


Room 206

by up_brendons_ass



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: F/M, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:35:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 49
Words: 63,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23307655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/up_brendons_ass/pseuds/up_brendons_ass
Summary: Daisy has been a straight-A student her entire life. She has a seemingly perfect life; good grades, a cute boyfriend, loyal best friends and an achievable goal to get into uni next year after she graduates. Unfortunately, her favorite English Professor had retired the year before, so she went back to school in the fall with rather bittersweet feelings.Daisy hates the new replacement professor. He's cocky, arrogant and their attitudes clash worse than anyone she's ever met in her life. She can't stand him, and she gets the idea that he can't stand her either. The last thing she wants to hear is her best friend fawning over him all day. Problems and stress start to practically eat her alive, and as her grades start slipping the Headmistress decides she needs tutoring lessons to get her grade back up. Guess who volunteered to help her?
Comments: 3
Kudos: 6





	1. Chapter 1

"Now remember to behave, we'll see you at Christmas," my mother said as she and my father kissed me on my cheeks before I boarded the train, my carry-on bag at my side as I looked around the car for my friends.

"Daisy!" I heard my name being called and I looked up, smiling brightly and my best friend Eleanor, her black hair looking perfect as ever around her small shoulders.

I made my way to sit with her, Eileen and Blair, my friends I'd been close with since year 7 when I first started school with them at the private school we all attended, miles away from my home in London with my parents. I'd gotten used to not seeing much of them over the school year, I was now in year 12 and this was my last year at this school.

"I wonder who the new replacement is going to be for Professor Henderson," Eileen said. "I reckon whoever it is will be great."

"Oh please." I rolled my eyes at the silly thought. "No one will ever compare to Henderson. He was the best English teacher in the world, no questions."

"Oh Daisy, I'm sure you'll change your mind about that eventually," Eleanor said.

I was about to protest but was jolted forward by the sudden movement of the train taking off to head to the school.

"Hi Alex!" Blair waved behind me and I turned and smiled at my boyfriend being me, clearly attempting to scare me but his plans had been ruined by Blair.

"Damn you, Blair!" he laughed, sitting on the seat next to me and wrapping his arm around my shoulders, giving me a kiss on the lips. "I was going to scare you."

"That doesn't surprise me," I said. "You know, one of these days I'm going to be used to it and it won't be scary to me anymore."

"You'll never get used to me," he smiled, nuzzling his nose against mine. "I'm full of all kinds of surprises."

"Oh would you two lovebirds get a room?" Eleanor said, attempting to push us apart.

"Yeah, I don't want to look at that!" Blair said. "I'm getting offended by my heterophobia!"

I stuck my tongue out at them both, Alex kissing me on the cheek.

"But really, Alex, I spent time with you all summer and I'll get to see you all the time this year," I said. "Go ahead and spend some time with your friends."

"Yeah, plus we're having girls' time right now!" Eleanor said. "Get your y-chromosomes out of here!"

"Are you sure?" Alex asked me. "The boys can wait--"

"I insist," I smiled. "I'll see you when we get to the school."

"Well, okay." Alex kissed me briefly again before he squeezed my hand and departed to a seat a few aisles down with his friends.

We spent the train ride catching up from our summer. We arrived at the school around noon and the girls and I got into a cart with our bags with Alex and his friends, taking us to our dorm buildings. We went up to our room, the same since year 7 up on the top floor.

I threw my bag onto my bed and chattered with the girls as we walked down to the dining hall for lunch and welcoming to the school.

We took our usual seats, watching the kids in year 7 looking around confused and sitting at random tables.

The headmistress, Mrs. Morris rang the bell at the head of the dining hall to get our attention.

"Okay, settle down everyone, settle down! Take your seats please!" she helped usher kids into seats to get started.

After a long welcoming speech about the curriculum and "purpose" of the school and information about getting our schedules, she finally introduced the new teacher.

"Lastly, I would like to introduce our new English professor for years 11 and 12," she said. "Professor Hemmings. He has replaced Professor Henderson's classroom in Room 206."

A very tall blonde man with glasses stood from the staff table and smiled a little, waving to everyone, and sat back down.

"Bloody hell," Eleanor muttered. "That man is quite the sight."

I rolled my eyes. "He's good looking but he's probably an awful teacher. I hope I don't have him."

"Alright, alright," Mrs. Morris settled the mutters of excited girls down. "Lunch is now served."

Over lunch, Eileen and Eleanor wouldn't shut up about the new Professor and how they hoped they had him for a teacher, and Eleanor even made a comment about failing his class purposely just to get extra tutoring time with a wink at Eileen, who giggled. Blair and I sat unamused, rolling our eyes at their comments.

"Let's go get our schedules guys," I said, standing after finishing my lunch and tugging Eleanor's arm.

Together, we walked to the table with schedules laid out. Many people crowded around it, searching for theirs. I found mine and looked over it, cringing to realize that I did in fact have Professor Hemmings as my English teacher in my last hour.

"I have him last hour!" Eleanor said to me excitedly.

"Me too," I groaned. "He better not think he'll ever be able to replace Professor Henderson."

"Oh Daisy, just relax," Eleanor said, putting her arm around my shoulders as we walked towards our dorm bedrooms. "I'm sure he's a wonderful teacher. This school is one of the best in England, they wouldn't have hired him if he wasn't."

"I suppose." I still wasn't convinced.

"How about we just go back and worry about it later," Eleanor said. "We have a couple other classes together don't we?"

We exchanged our schedules and classes, discovering we had half of our classes together. I met with Alex in the library and found that we had a few classes together as well.

I went to sleep that night hoping for the best for this year but having a feeling it wouldn't be a normal one.

Little did I know that it was about to be the furthest from normal I'd ever had.

A/N: just something quick here! descriptions of the girls will arise throughout the story but I just wanted it to be clear that Alex is supposed to be like a young Johnny Depp bc holy hot damn mm


	2. Chapter 2

Our first day of classes started the following Monday, and I was happy with the classes I'd had and the teachers I had--all except for English.

I rolled my eyes as Professor Hemmings wrote something on the board and I plopped down in a seat next to Eleanor and sighed heavily.

"Oh come on, just give him a chance," she said, nudging my arm.

I didn't want to give him a "chance." I was happy for Professor Henderson, I was happy that he was settling down and retiring with his wife and family. I wasn't happy that I no longer had my favorite teacher of all time, one that encouraged me to chase my dreams and the only one who seemed to share my love for novels.

I rolled my eyes. "Fine, but I'm not going to like him. I already know it."

"Hey Daisy," I felt a pair of warm soft lips against my cheek and I turned with a bit of a smile to see Alex sitting in the seat next to me, setting his bag down as well.

"Hi Alex," I leaned over and gave him a quick kiss and he asked me how my first day was going but we were interrupted by the bell ringing.

"Alright class." Professor Hemmings turned around and faced us, speaking with a funny accent. "I'm your new English professor. I know that if you are willing to cooperate, we are going to have a great year together."

I snorted and rolled my eyes, crossing my arms and leaning back against my seat. Eleanor kicked my foot.

"Is there something you'd like to say, miss?" Professor Hemmings turned to me and raised his eyebrow. "What's your name?"

"Daisy Williams," I said, staring back at him with the same look. "And you better remember it, because you're not going to hear the end of me today."

He furrowed his eyebrows at me. "Miss Williams, I am your professor. I deserve to be talked to with a little more respect than that."

"No one deserves respect until they earn it," I snapped back.

He glared at me and crossed his arms. "Do you really want this to be my first impression of you?"

"I don't give a shit what you think of me," I laughed.

"I'll be seeing you after class." He turned back to the class and I rolled my eyes.

"That's a new record for you," Eleanor whispered as he was talking about a lesson facing the board. "Detention on the first day."

I smirked at her and shrugged. "I guess I better make my last year my best huh?"

"Not by getting detention!" Eleanor said worriedly. "If you ever want to get into uni you can't get detention all the time!"

"Excuse me," Professor Hemmings said, startling Eleanor. "What is your name?"

"Eleanor Cooper," she said quietly.

"Do you wish to join Miss Williams in detention?" he asked.

"No sir," she shook her head.

"Then do not talk while I am trying to teach," he said.

Eleanor tilted her head down and didn't say anything to anyone for the rest of the class.

After a long hour of listening to Professor Hemmings drone on about novels we'll be reading throughout the year--all ones that I'd already read numerous times--and what he was going to do with the class in his shitty style of teaching and his weird ass foreign accent, the bell finally rang and he dismissed the class.

Alex looked hesitant to stand and leave but I waved him off.

"I'm fine. I'll meet you in the library afterwards," I said.

"Okay." He looked between Professor Hemmings and I and walked out the door with Eleanor.

I let out a heavy sigh and remained in my seat while Professor Hemmings approached my desk, pushing his black framed glasses up his nose with his long finger. He stood in front of me and I looked up at him, arms crossed.

"I would highly recommend you get your attitude in check, Miss Williams," he said.

"And what if I don't? Are you going to bend me over a desk and spank me with a ruler?" I asked. He was undoubtedly good looking but I had a boyfriend and I just wanted to push his buttons.

His cheeks flushed pink and he scowled at me. "That is an inappropriate comment I will not tolerate you making. Do you understand that I am your professor and you must listen to me or I'll be sending you to Headmistress Morris's office?"

"Nowhere I haven't already been," I smirked up at him, watching steam shoot out his ears.

"I could have you expelled, young lady."

"Well then I guess I better start behaving myself shouldn't I?" I stood from my seat and looked up at him. He was still towering over me when I stood.

"Yes you should."

"May I be excused, Professor Hemmings?" I asked, picking up my bag.

"No, you may not. You have a 30 minute detention," he replied, taking my bag from me and setting it back down on the ground.

I rolled my eyes and plopped back down in my seat, pulling out homework from another class I'd had. Professor Hemmings sat at his desk going through papers and occasionally pushing up those stupid fucking glasses of his and writing something out on paper. Why did such an annoying teacher have to be so pleasant to look at?

When my 30 minute detention was finally over with, Professor Hemmings dismissed me and I was tempted to flip him my middle finger and suck on it as I walked out.

I found my way down to the library in the familiar halls. I entered it and found Alex, sitting down next to him and pulling out my remaining homework.

"I think English is going to be fun this year," he said. "I'm excited to read the novels planned for us this year."

"I've already read all of them," I said, practically yawning.

"Well look at you," he smirked, leaning in and kissing my nose. "What do you think about the new professor?"

"I fucking hate him."


	3. Chapter 3

Thankfully, the week was short and I met up with Alex after he'd showered from his football practice. He walked with me to the town less than a mile away, which we were allowed to go to on weekends. It wasn't large, and it wasn't always entertaining but it was a nice outlet from the school.

We walked hand in hand down the streets, occasionally stopping to look at the little stores and even get some ice cream and walk down the road in the comfortable September air.

"How are you liking your classes?" Alex asked me, walking right beside me as we walked back towards the school.

"I like them all except English," I scoffed. "I hate the class, I hate Professor Hemmings and I hate his attitude."

"He can't be that bad," Alex said. "The only reason he gets so snippy with you is because you provoke him."

"Yeah, but he thinks he can just walk in and own the place like he's been teaching there for years," I said. "It's so annoying and his stupid accent makes me want to off myself."

"I think you're comparing him a little too much to Henderson," Alex said.

"I am not!" I protested, though I knew it was true. I was comparing him to Henderson but only because nobody would ever be as great as Henderson.

"I think you should give him a bit of a break though," Alex said. "I mean, it's his first week and I swear I can see him getting grey hairs because of you."

"Oh that is such a hyperbole," I rolled my eyes. "He's so young he might as well have a binky in his mouth while he teaches."

Alex laughed and intertwined our hands, leaning down to kiss my cheek.

"I don't want to talk about that jackass anymore," I said. "Its putting me in a rather sour mood."

"Well then let's talk about someone else," he smiled down at me. "How's Eleanor?"

-

At dinner, Eleanor and Eileen babbled about some boy in their science class and Blair told me about new songs she'd been learning on her guitar, along with a few original songs she'd been working on writing (which I of course made sure to bribe her into playing for us girls back in the dorms). I faced the opposite way of Professor Hemmings sitting at the staff table eating his dinner and instead occupied myself by admiring Alex's jawline from the side where he ate with his friends.

Back in the dorms, all of us girls brushed our teeth together like we usually did, washing our faces and getting into bed and talking about various things.

We all had our lamps on beside our beds and I was laying on my stomach, Eleanor sitting on my bed with me while we talked to Blair and Eileen sitting together across from us on Eileen's bed.

"I don't get it," Eileen said. "Everyone freaks out over how mean Professor Hemmings is. Is he that bad?"

"Yes," I said at the same time Eleanor said "no."

"Oh come on, Daisy, of course you'd say yes," Eleanor rolled her eyes. "You're the reason he's so mean! You make him angry!"

"I do not," I lied. "It's not my fault he gets offended at everything I say when I correct him or make sure he knows he's not as smart as he thinks he is."

"You don't have to be so harsh, Daisy," she said, nudging me. "Are you sure you don't like him and it's all just an act?"

Eileen giggled and I rolled my eyes. "No. I just like getting on his nerves because it's funny. I don't know why everything I do pisses him off so much."

"Oh my god, but it's so hot," Eleanor gushed. "His jaw does the thing and it makes me want to rip the buttons open on his shirt."

"You're gross," I laughed and Eileen and Blair laughed at Eleanor, who was shrugging and laughing with us.

"You can't deny you'd hop in his bed if you were given that chance," Eleanor said. "He's so tall, I'd imagine it's pretty big."

"It's not always about size you know," I said. "It's just about how good he is with it."

"Oh is that so, Daisy?" Eileen teased, reaching across the beds to nudge me and I just shook my head laughing at all of them "oo"ing at me.

"You guys sound like a bunch of monkeys," I said, ignoring Eleanor's comment about "how good Alex is with it."

"You're the one who made the comment," Blair shrugged.

"You guys don't have to take it so literally though," I said. "It's just an honest statement."

"Do you mean to tell us that Alex isn't that big but you try to make him feel better by saying it's not just about size?" Eleanor smirked at me.

"No," I huffed at them. "And not that it's any of your concern, but Alex isn't as tiny as you think he is."

The four of us bursted out in laughter, and as much as I liked to think we were different for being in an elite school for the gifted, I knew by the fact that we had conversations like this that we were just like any other group of teenage girls.

"How are things with you and Alex?" Eileen asked me.

"They're okay." I shrugged.

"What do you mean?" Eleanor asked.

"I mean, we're still together and we spend time together but we aren't really moving forward a whole lot. He's busy with football practice all the time and I'm busy with all my classes. We don't get a whole lot of time for each other much."

"You guys hung out today?" Blair leaned in and rested her head in her hand.

"Yeah and it was nice," I said. "I just wish we had more time together."

"I'm sure once school gets settled in better you guys will work something out to spend time together," Eileen said, smiling at me. "You guys seem happy together."

"Yeah, but we got out of the honeymoon stage about a month ago and we've gotten to the constant bickering stage," I rolled my eyes. "He gets so annoying sometimes."

"Boys." Blair rolled her eyes too.

Eileen giggled at Blair and we were interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Lights out ladies!" A voice called from outside the door.

We all got into our own beds and tucked ourselves in, saying goodnight to each other as I reached to switch off my lamp. I snuggled into my blankets and was haunted in my dreams by those annoying blue eyes behind those black framed glasses.


	4. Chapter 4

"Alright," Professor Hemmings practically slammed down his stupid white board pen after writing on the board and stood with his hands in his pockets in front of my English class Monday afternoon.

I clicked my pen in and out, annoyed with the boredom that came with coming to this class everyday.

"I want you all the read Macbeth until the end of Act Two, Scene Two and I expect an opinion formed on it because I will be asking for a few of you to share tomorrow in class when we reflect," he said.

"Macbeth," I mumbled. "How classic."

"Do you have something you would like to share with the class, Miss Williams?" Professor Hemmings turned to me all of a sudden.

"Oh no, sir," I smiled at him. "It's just that I've already read Macbeth at least twenty times."

"Well read it again." He turned around and I rolled my eyes, making a face at him.

I skimmed over the pages just to get a refresher in the library after class, spending an hour or two getting all my homework done and doing some studying. Alex joined me at first but had to leave early to go to football practice before dinner.

I packed up my books and pulled my bag over my shoulder, heading back to my dorms to put them away before heading to dinner. Alex wanted to sit with the girls and I at dinner, and Eileen and Eleanor had already left so Blair and I walked down to the dining hall together.

We were served our dinner and Alex showed up a few minutes late, but sat with us and still tried to get in on the conversation once he had.

"...And he smiled at me when he handed me pencil and said that my hair looked pretty today and I think we're going to be planning a wedding soon," Eileen sat practically with heart eyes as she talked to Eleanor about a boy in her science class who picked up her pencil for her when she dropped it. Alex laughed at them while Blair sat and rolled her eyes.

"Boys are gross," she said. "No offense Alex."

"None taken," he said. "I agree."

"Your love life sounds so boring, Blair," Eileen said. "There has to be someone you're not telling us about."

"Yeah, who is it?" Eleanor asked.

Blair sighed. "Okay, there's this girl in my world history class."

"Ooh, tell us more!" Eileen grabbed Blair's arm, getting excited.

"That's the problem! There is no more," she sighed, setting her fork down. "She's so out of my league."

"Oh come on, Blair you are so hot," Eleanor said. "No one is 'out of your league.'"

"I'm pretty sure she's straight anyways," Blair rolled her eyes. "Why do all the hot girls have to be either straight or bitches?"

"Tell me about it," Alex said. "Minus the straight part."

"Well what's she like?" I asked.

"She has blonde hair, really long, really pretty blonde hair," she said. "And she has the most stunning green eyes."

"Hey, you should ask her out," Alex said.

"I've tried!" Blair hit her hand against her forehead. "But she thinks I'm asking to hang out, not go on a date. And every time I tell her that she's cute she thinks I'm just being nice. No, you're cute and I want to date you!"

I laughed, imagining how hard it must be. I have to admit that if another girl told me I was cute I would just assume she meant in a friendly way.

"Maybe you should ask her if you can take her on a date," Alex said. "Then maybe she'll get the hint."

"I don't know," she said. "I need to grow a pair first. I am in no way ready to face humiliation if she tells me she's straight."

"Well you can always date me if things go wrong with her," Eileen winked at Blair, making us all laugh. They had the funniest friendship, a lot of times people would come and ask me or Eleanor if they were together.

I finished eating dinner and waited up a few minutes with Alex while the other girls went back to the dorms right away. We took a little longer than usual when he walked me to my dorm building, and when he kissed me goodnight it got a little heated before we decided to actually say goodnight before we got caught by some professor.

"Daisy, we hope you know the importance of using protection," Eileen said as she stood in front of the mirror in the bathroom, braiding her long wavy blonde hair.

"What?" I picked up my toothbrush and looked at her questioningly. She smirked and glanced over at Blair, who was brushing her teeth and had to spit in the sink because she started laughing.

"Eileen and Blair were making jokes about you and Alex sneaking off to go fuck in a broom closet somewhere a few minutes ago," Eleanor informed me as she entered the bathroom as well, pulling her black hair into a ponytail away from her face while she washed it.

I rolled my eyes at the girls. They had the dumbest sense of humor, I really didn't understand why they were laughing most of the time.

"Was he using it right?" Eileen asked, giggling as I shook my head and rolled my eyes.

"You guys are ridiculous." I brushed my teeth and climbed into bed afterwards. Alex was too paranoid to even do anything at school anyways.

"I'm pretty sure my parents would put a chastity belt on me and lock me in a closet until I'm 30 if they ever found out about what I've done, let alone what I've said," Eileen climbed into bed, still laughing about her and Blair coming up with her silly broom closet sex theories.

"Oh yikes, not a closet," Blair said. "I've already spent enough time in there and I never want to go back."

I chuckled a little at Blair's comment, but I was too tired to reply.

-

"Would anyone like to share their thoughts on Macbeth?"

I sat in English and did my usual staring at the ceiling or the floor until class was over.

Professor Hemmings called on a small girl who sat close to the back with a somewhat high pitched voice.

"Well, um... I think Macbeth was under a lot of pressure from Lady Macbeth and that killing Duncan wasn't something he actually wanted to do," she said. "Lady Macbeth was basically taunting him the entire time and he felt belittled by her and probably felt that in order to keep her respect then he needed to kill Duncan."

I snorted, earning a glare from Professor Hemmings.

"That is a very good point you are making," he said.

I rolled my eyes and raised my hand, something I didn't do very often in that class.

"Yes, Miss Williams?" he called on me.

"I think that's the biggest load of dog shit I've ever heard," I said. "Macbeth wasn't afraid of losing respect from his wife. Obviously if she was pressuring him into killing Duncan by taunting him and telling him he wasn't a man if he didn't do it then she doesn't even respect him in the first place. He should have told her no, turned the bitch in and waited to become king himself. If the witches said it would happen, then it would happen and he didn't have to induce it."

"Language please," Professor Hemmings said.

"But the only reason he did become king was because he did do it," the girl replied to me. "The witches said it would happen, and had he not done it then it wouldn't have happened. They foresaw him killing Duncan and knew it was going to happen."

"If your fate is to become king, then it will happen," I said, turning to face her. "I wouldn't listen to what the witches said anyways. They clearly went against what Hecate wanted them to do in the first place, so Macbeth was never even supposed to know."

The girl didn't reply to what I said and I turned back around and looked at Professor Hemmings, who appeared to be watching us thoughtfully.

"Any other thoughts?" he asked. No one raised their hand or said a word.

"Very well," he said. "Turn to page 394 in your textbooks."

Class ended and I walked out with Eleanor and Alex, and he kissed me goodbye before heading off to football practice.

"Oh my god," Eleanor said, watching him go. "Daisy, you are so lucky."

"Why do you say that?" I asked, though I knew why as I checked out his ass while he walked the opposite direction.

"The entire time you were arguing in class it's like he had hearts in his eyes watching you," she gushed. "God, I wish I had a boyfriend who loved me that much."

"Love?" I stopped in my tracks. "Eleanor, we've only been together a few months."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to drop that word there," she said. "But he is so infatuated with you, God you guys are so cute."

"It's just him," I smiled, nudging her while we walked to the library. "He's the cute one."

"Well I'm not going to argue that you did excellent at picking a good looking one," she winked and I laughed, interlocking my arm with hers as we walked into the library to sit and do our homework.


	5. Chapter 5

"Go Alex!" I yelled from my seat as I watched him Saturday morning pass the ball to one of his teammates, who kicked it into the goal and I jumped up and cheered.

Alex smiled at me from on the field, pushing his hair off of his forehead and walking back to his position on the field.

I sat and watched the remainder of the game, screaming and cheering for him when he kicked the ball into a winning goal and the game ended. I ran out onto the field into his arms and kissed him, proud of him for playing so well in the game.

He and I walked into the building together, and I saw out of the corner of my eye that Professor Hemmings was in the stands watching us the entire time. I walked into the building with Alex and waited for him in the foyer while he got cleaned up.

"Miss Williams." I heard a familiar voice say and I rolled my eyes before I turned around and put on my best fake enthusiasm.

"Hi Professor Hemmings," I smiled.

"I was quite impressed by your interpretation of Macbeth in class this week," he said. "Not many students can read and comprehend to an understanding of yours on their own. I also was impressed by your strong and well-thought opinion on his actions."

"Thanks," I said awkwardly.

He stared down at me with his piercing blue eyes for a moment before he turned and walked away without saying another word.

Within a couple minutes, Alex had exited his dorms and held my hand, walking with me outside.

"I heard we're dissecting frogs in my science class next week," Alex said. "I can't decide if I'm excited for it or if I'm going to be too grossed out by it."

"I love dissecting things!" I said. "I dissected a lamb's heart last year, oh it was so fun."

"Gross," he laughed. "Wouldn't blood get everywhere with a heart though?"

"Not if all of the blood is drained from it first, silly," I said, his hand finding mine as we walked.

"The idea is still so gross and slightly haunting," he said. "That heart was once beating and supporting a lamb and now it's dead and you're cutting it apart to see what's inside."

"I suppose," I said. "But it's not like I was hurting it since it was already dead."

"I still don't think I'll enjoy it," he said. "My forte isn't in science, it's in maths."

"Yeah, you maths nerd," I teased.

"You're the one who always corrects the professor in English!" he laughed. "Who are you calling nerd?"

"We're both nerds," I said. "That's why we're in a nerd school, isn't it?"

"I prefer the term 'elite school for the gifted.'"

"Well whatever floats your boat I guess. Anyone in the world would call us a bunch of nerds."

"You're annoying," he laughed, stopping and leaning down to kiss me as we reached the little town streets.

"Do you want to get something to eat?" I asked. "I'm rather hungry and you've got to be starving from the game."

"Sure," he said. We walked towards the little restaurant in town and sat down waiting for our sandwiches to arrive.

"I don't have any other classes with you other than World History with Professor Clifford," Alex said. "I wish we had more classes together like we did last year."

I shrugged. "At least we get to see each other. I heard there's a girl in our year who has a boyfriend back home that she hardly ever gets to see."

"Yeah, you're right," he said. "I guess I just get a bit greedy sometimes."

"It happens when you're a spoiled white rich kid," I smiled, knowing that everyone's parents in this school had a lot of money to even get into this school, and it rarely gave scholarships.

"Hey, we all are," he smiled back, our sandwiches arriving at our table with us.

We ate in a comfortable silence, able to appreciate each others' company. I was secretly admiring his jawline and cheekbones and lips and basically his entire face while he ate and looked at the pictures on the wall.

"How are your classes going?" I asked as I finished the last couple bites of my sandwich.

"They're going fine," he said. "It's a bit hard juggling practice with homework and what not but I'm sure it'll get better as the year progresses."

"I hope I don't burden you," I said, taking a drink of my glass of water to wash down the remainder of my sandwich.

"No," he said. "It's actually nice having someone so pretty to distract me from all the stress."

I felt my cheeks flush and I smiled at him, honored by his compliment.

"What about Professor Hemmings?" he asked. "Anything better with him?"

I literally cringed at his name. "Don't even get me started."

"He's really not that bad," he said. "You're the one who makes him out to be Satan."

"Because he might as well be," I said. "He's such a fucking dick, why am I the only one who sees this?"

"Maybe because you're the only one who thinks that?"

"I guess I'm the only one who knows what a good professor is," I rolled my eyes, pushing my plate away and standing up.

"Daisy..." Alex reached for my arm but I pulled away.

"Don't 'Daisy' me," I said.

"You're just mad because Professor Henderson retired and you want him back but you can't have him," Alex snapped at me.

"Why do you all think it's so bad that I miss having an old teacher?" I snapped back at him. "You all act like I'm not entitled to dislike someone and their shitty way of teaching."

Alex sighed and rubbed his head, and I grabbed my jacket off of the back of my chair.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"Back to my room," I glared at him, pulling on my jacket and grabbing my purse.

"Let me walk you back," he said.

"No." I turned to walk out the door and didn't look back at him.

-

After telling Eleanor about everything that happened with Alex back at the dorms, and her assuring me it was just a minor argument that would pass over, I relaxed the rest of the day and ignored Alex and everyone else outside of our room.

In church on Sunday, I sat with the girls and leaved almost immediately after. I barely even looked at Alex and spent Sunday studying in my room.

I didn't care if I was being hard on Professor Hemmings. No one would compare to Henderson no matter how hard everyone tried to make him be better.


	6. Chapter 6

"So the guy from science asked me on a date," Eileen said as she sat down with us at breakfast excitedly.

"Just now?" Eleanor asked, and Eileen nodded, smiling.

"He wants to go get lunch on Saturday!" She said as she took a bite of her oatmeal.

I was happy for Eileen, but I was still a bit bummed out from my argument with Alex on Saturday. We hadn't said anything to each other since, and it was now Monday morning and he was still sitting at the table with his friends and hadn't even looked at me.

I sighed and ate my own oatmeal, not bothering to look in his direction anymore.

"He'll get over it," Eleanor said to me, rubbing my shoulder as she ate her oatmeal.

As if on cue, I felt a large warm hand on my shoulder and I turned to see it was none other than Alex himself looking down at me.

"Can we talk?" he asked.

I stood from my oatmeal and followed him a little bit away from the table and he let go over my shoulder and turned to face me.

"I'm really sorry about Saturday," he said. "I was being a total dick the way I was talking to you, and I was being extremely insensitive to your feelings."

"I'm sorry too," I said. "I snapped at you and got really defensive for no reason and you didn't deserve that."

"Let's both be more sensitive to each other?" he said.

I nodded. He pulled me in for a hug, and I relaxed in his warm embrace.

I told myself to also be a little less harsh on Professor Hemmings, but my mouth seemed to have a mind of its own once I got into English and once again ended up with detention.

"I am really getting sick of your attitude, Miss Williams," he said to me after class. I crossed my arms and titled my head down.

"Pouting is not going to get you anywhere," he said. "I suggest you start showing me respect or this will become a regular thing."

"Yes sir," I mumbled, humiliated.

He walked back to his desk and I started on my homework that I had. He left me alone, and I trudged back to my room when I was done, still pouting.

"Look who's finally back!" Eleanor giggled, throwing her arm around me as I walked in the door. I sighed and sat down on my bed. All of the girls were way too wound up for me at that moment.

"How was detention?" Eileen teased, winking at me.

"It was awful, like always." I kept it short and laid on my bed, closing my eyes maybe in hopes to take a nap but also maybe in hopes to make them leave me alone.

"You know what I think?" Eleanor whispered. "I think she's secretly in there fucking Professor Hemmings and not telling anyone about it." All of the girls giggled at her comment.

"How could you say that?!" I snapped at her, sitting up and facing her.

"Whoa, Daisy calm down," Eleanor said. "I was only kidding."

"Well it wasn't funny!" I stormed into the bathroom and slammed the door shut, deciding to let myself steam by taking a shower.

I was in way longer than I intended because I'd been thinking about everything way too much. I stepped out into the bedroom to see that none of the girls were there. Looking at the time, I realized this was because I was already 10 minutes late to dinner.

I hurriedly dried my hair enough so I wasn't cold and got dressed, rushing down to the dining hall and accidentally running right into someone in the foyer.

I stumbled and fell on the ground, looking up to see it was Alex, who was looking down at me in concern.

"Daisy, are you okay?" he asked me, holding his hand out to help me up but I stayed on the ground as I burst into tears.

"Whoa, what's wrong?" he asked, crouching down on the floor next to me and wrapping his arms around me while I cried.

"I just snapped at the girls because they made a joke and now I feel like shit because of it," I cried. "I got way too defensive and I wanted to apologize but they're probably mad at me now."

"Hey, it's okay," he said. "It's not that big of a deal. You've all been friends for years, I'm sure it's nothing."

I sniffed and wiped my tears away with my sleeve. Why was I even crying anyways?

"I think I'm supposed to get my period soon," I cried even more, dreading the fact that I now had that to look forward to.

Alex laughed a little, taking my hands to pull me to my feet and wrapped his arms around me in a real hug.

"Why don't you sit with the boys and I for dinner tonight to let them cool off if they're angry?" he offered. "And you can talk to them when you go back to your room."

I nodded and wiped my tears away again, following him into the dining hall to the table he usually sat at with his friends.

I didn't enjoy myself during dinner at all because they all talked about sports and maths and I ate my food quietly, Alex's hand resting on my thigh for a bit of the dinner.

He walked me back to my room after dinner, giving me a kiss goodnight and telling me it was going to be just fine before I went into the room to see the girls.

"There you are!" Eleanor said, sitting up from where she was laying on her bed. "We didn't know where you were during dinner!"

"I was eating with Alex and his friends," I said. "I'm sorry for snapping at you guys. It was only a joke and I got way too defensive over it."

"We're sorry too," Eileen said. "We shouldn't have made that comment. It was crossing the line a little too much."

"Do you forgive me?" I asked them.

"Of course we do!" Eleanor and the other two came over and all gave me a group hug.

"I really just want to sleep now," I said, entering the bathroom to brush my teeth. "I want the day to be over."

I passed out almost as soon as I was in bed.


	7. Chapter 7

I spent the entire week trying to stay on Professor Hemmings' good side. The last thing I needed was to get detention again and end up in Headmistress Morris's office. I was basically pouting all week in English, biting my tongue from making a smart-ass comment to everything Professor Hemmings said even though it was so tempting and he left himself wide open for so many insults.

I also spent the week hanging out quietly with the girls, not seeing much of Alex because of his practices and my homework and studying to do. Basically I spent the entire week having my own pity party because nothing seemed to be going my way even though nothing was really going wrong either.

"Miss Williams, will stay for a minute please?" Professor Hemmings asked me as class ended on Friday afternoon while I packed up my belongings.

I stopped and held my bag over my shoulder, walking to his desk as a few of the last few students left the classroom.

"I couldn't help but notice that you have been rather quiet this week," he said as he stood and erased the board from his lecture of the day.

"That's pretty observant of you," I said.

"Though you clearly haven't lost your mouth," he replied.

"I wouldn't be able to talk or eat or suck dick without one," I shrugged.

He turned and glared at me, turning back to the board as he finished erasing.

"You really have no filter," he said, putting the eraser down and turning back to me. "Which is why I was surprised that you've kept your comments to yourself this week. Or have you simply run out of your disrespectful remarks?"

"Oh no, I still think them all throughout class," I informed him. "I have just learned my lesson that speaking out in class is rude and if I want to get into uni then I better stay on your good side."

"More like get on my good side," he said. "I am still watching you very closely, Miss Williams. No funny business."

"Oh, I wouldn't dream of it," I smiled and turned around, walking towards the door with a little bounce in my step.

"Wait a minute," he said. "I had one other thing I wanted to talk to you about."

I turned around and faced him, walking forward when he motioned for me to come closer as he shuffled something around on his desk.

"Next quarter there will be an advanced English class," he said. "I think--as painful as it is for me to admit it--you are very intelligent and you would do well in this class."

"I am very intelligent, thank you for noticing," I said, smirking at him and he rolled his eyes.

"Anyway, think about it," he said. He handed me a paper. "This has more information about it."

I took the paper and stuffed into my bag. "Am I excused now, sir?"

"Yes." He watched me as I turned and exited, heading towards the library to do my studying and homework for the week, then stopped and remembered I had other plans with someone else for the night and headed back toward my room instead.

I honestly wasn't refraining from mouthing off to Professor Hemmings for the sake of wanting to get into uni and get on his good side; I was holding myself back because I was just sick of getting detention all the time. Plus it was more fun to be quiet during class and mouth off to him outside of class just to keep him on his toes. He didn't seem as irritated with me anymore, and he was beginning to get used to my vulgar language despite the fact that my parents raised me to be prim and proper. I'll sit with my legs crossed and raise my little finger while I sip my tea but when they're not watching, hell if I'll be that same good little princess they see all the time.

And honestly, what the fuck about the "advanced English class"? I am aware that I am intelligent but I don't understand why he was encouraging me to do these things when I clearly despised him? I guess it's his job as a teacher to encourage his students but you'd think he hated me too much to do that.

I walked into my room and set my bag down, intentions on finishing my homework later. I changed into jeans to be more comfortable than my school uniform.

"Oh, Daisy," Eleanor walked in while I was pulling on my sweater and winked at me. "What did you do with Professor Hemmings after class there?"

"Very funny," I made a face at her and sat down to put my shoes on. "He was asking me why I was so quiet in class and then gave me this stupid thing about an advanced English class next quarter."

"And then did he fuck you on his desk?"

"No!" I swatted her arm. "God, why don't you just go do it yourself?"

"I was just wondering why you're changing your clothes on a Friday afternoon," she said. "You usually get in your pajamas and watch movies with us girls."

"Alex and I are going out for a little while," I informed her. "He feels he's been neglecting me all week and wants to make up for it."

"Oh I see, " she wiggled her eyebrows at me. "You have condoms right?"

"Eleanor!" I yelled, but I was laughing and so was she. I lowered my voice a little. "Even if I wanted to have sex with him, he wouldn't do it so close to the school grounds. He's a little bitch when it comes to being paranoid about someone walking in on us."

"That's too bad," she shook her head. "You must not get it very often."

"I don't," I said. "But it's okay because we are focused on the romantic part of our relationship more than the sexual part."

"BOR-ING!" she yelled, throwing her pillow at me and I laughed, throwing it back at her.

"Stop distracting me!" I giggled. "You're going to make me late."

"Sorry!" She ran to her dresser and pulled out her pajamas while I grabbed my jacket and walked towards the door. "Don't suck his dick too hard!"

I rolled my eyes at her, opening the door and walking out and down the hallway to the stairs that led into the foyer where I was going to meet up with Alex.

Alex was waiting for me and I approached him as I pulled my jacket on my shoulders and reached for his hand.

"Sorry I'm late," I said. "Hemmings kept me after class and Eleanor was being very distracting."

He frowned for a moment but then chuckled a little. "She's a bit of a goof."

"You have no idea," I rolled my eyes. "Anyways, where do you want to go first?"

"I'm really craving something sweet today," he said. "I think we should go to that little candy shop to see what they have."

"I only want chocolate," I said. "But we can go there and see."

"They have lots of chocolate, believe me," he said, beginning out the door and down the little gravel trail that led into the town.

-

An hour and a half later, we were walking through the town with chocolate, not eating it yet since we didn't want to spoil our dinner walking back towards the trail that led back to the school to make it to the dining hall in time.

"We hardly got any time together this week," I said. "I'm so glad we got some today."

"Me too," he said. "I feel like it's hard to make time for each other now."

"You know what we haven't done in a while," I turned and stopped him.

"What?" he asked.

I reached up and brushed a few strands of hair from his eyes. He took my hand from his face and I pulled him with me between two buildings in the street, into a narrow alley that concealed the view of others and he backed me into the brick wall behind me.

His lips met mine and I pulled him by the collar of his shirt closer to me, his hands grabbing onto my waist and pulling me against him more.

My hands traveled down his shirt, grabbing the fabric in my hands while his own large hands slid under my shirt, one grabbing the top of my jeans and the other reaching up and cupping my bra. I tilted my head to the side and let his lips kiss against my neck and his teeth bite down on it, sucking on my skin. I pulled him even closer as his hands rested on my waist, his hips grinding against mine. I ran my fingers through his hair, tugging on it slightly while he continued to suck on the spot against my neck.

"God I've missed you," he said in a low voice in my ear and pulled my ear between his teeth and released it, letting me melt under his touch. His fingers dug into my sides as he kissed me again, his hand wandering down to my ass and grabbing it.

"Please Alex," I pulled away from our kiss long enough to whisper, but he pulled away slightly and rested his forehead against mine.

"Where would we even do anything?" he asked softly. "It's too easy to get caught."

I sighed, knowing he was right but disappointed. I shouldn't have hoped for something to happen when I should have known how it was going to end.

"I'm sorry Daisy," he said, his forehead still against mine. "I want to but I don't want to get caught and us both end up getting expelled."

"I know," I said. "I understand. Let's head back to the school before we miss dinner."

-

"So how was it?" Eileen asked me, jumping on my bed after dinner in our room.

"It was boring," I said. "We finally got to at least make out a little and it ended pretty much as quickly as it started."

"Lame," Blair said. "Are you sure he's not gay and that's why he won't do anything with you?"

"I don't know," I said. "But I'm honestly so disappointed. I know I'm probably being a little greedy but I'm just so bored."

"You wouldn't be bored with you fucked Hemmings," Eleanor said, smirking at me from her bed across from me. 

"Would you shut up about him?" I rolled my eyes. "He's not even that cute when you look at him for an hour and a half straight."

"Oh yes he is," she said. "I bet you'd change your mind if he bent you over his desk."

Eileen laughed while I scoffed and climbed under my covers. "You're annoying."

"I know." The girls moved to their own beds, climbing in while I shut off my lamp and we all said goodnight. I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep as soon as I could.


	8. Chapter 8

Saturday afternoon I went with Blair to get some ice cream after we ate lunch in the dining hall since it was free there and we didn't want to spend extra money. During our walk there, she asked me about Alex but I was disappointed to tell her that nothing was new; our relationship seemed to be at a standstill.

"It's such a shame," she said. "You'd think that such a good looking and outgoing guy would be fun and exciting." 

"He usually is," I sighed. "I don't know, he's probably just under a lot of stress from football practice and all the classes and homework he has. He doesn't get a whole lot of free time, but we're trying to make it work as best as we can."

"But what about in bed?" she asked. "I've never slept with a guy, it fascinates me how they must be in bed."

I blushed. "I don't know, I told you guys already we haven't done anything in over a month because he's too paranoid about getting caught at school."

"Interesting." We moved forward in our line to get ice cream. "Is it weird to go from being able to do it almost anytime you wanted over the summer to just nothing at all now?"

"A little." I laughed at the awkwardness of this conversation, and I knew my face was as red as a tomato.

"Sorry, I'll stop asking so many questions," she laughed too, and turned to the cashier and ordered her ice cream. 

Blair and I sat down with our ice cream cones, eating them and chatting away about our lives at school. The two of us didn't have many classes together, so we mostly caught up on that.

"What about the girl from your World History class?" I asked. 

"Oh, Karen?" she asked. "Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Still in the friendzone."

"Why haven't you talked to her?" I asked. "Why don't you flat out tell her that you're into her?"

"Speak of the devil and he shall arrive," Blair looked at the door with wide eyes, shoving her head down and licking her ice cream cone as a group of three girls walked by.

"Which one is she?" I asked, leaning over to get a better view of them.

"Don't be so obvious!" Blair hissed, swatting my hand and I looked at her, laughing a little.

"Who is she?" 

"She's the one with the blonde hair. Blue jumper." I turned and looked, and saw a thin girl with a blue jumper, dark jeans and long, straight blonde hair going down her back.

"Go talk to her!" I gave Blair a little shove towards the walkway.

"Are you mad?!" she turned to look at Karen, then back at me. "She's probably as straight as her hair!"

"But if she's not, you're really missing out," I said, leaning over to check out the girl's ass. "I'm straight and even I would want some of that."

"You have your own!" Blair whined, laying her forehead against the table.

"You need to go talk to her or you'll miss your chance," I said. "She walked in here while we were here. It must be fate."

"She'll probably think I'm such a loser!" she said, sitting back up and looking at me, then turning back to Karen, who was walking with her other two friends with their ice cream to sit at a table. 

"No she won't! Get your cute little patoot over there and talk to her right now!" I ordered, and Blair finally stood and took a deep breath.

She walked hesitantly in the direction of the girls' table and looked back at me, and I nodded encouragingly, giving 2 thumbs up for emphasis. She turned back around and walked up to the table with confidence.

I saw Karen smile up at her, the other two friends leaning over and giggling with each other. Karen nodded up at Blair, reaching into her purse and grabbing a pen, talking to her while she wrote something down on a napkin sitting on the table.

Karen waved goodbye to Blair, and Blair walked back over, sitting down with me and smiling big.

"Well?!" I prompted.

"I got her number!" she practically squealed.

"That's how it's done!" I high-fived her across the table.

-

The entire walk back to the dorms, Blair wouldn't shut up about Karen and how happy and excited she was to have gotten her number. She walked into our dorms, gushing to Eleanor and Eileen about what happened, both of them of course being excited for her.

I sat on my bed, watching the excitement buzzing through the room with a smile on my face when I heard my phone ringing, and I almost rolled my eyes when I looked at the caller ID.

"Hey Alex," I said into the phone.

"Hey Daisy," he said. "I was just wanting to know if you wanted to go do something before dinner."

"No," I said. "I mean, you should spend some time with your friends. We went out last night anyways."

"Are you sure?" he asked. "I felt kinda bad about--"

"Don't worry about it," I assured him. "Just go have some fun with the boys and I'll see you at dinner."

"Well okay," he said hesitantly. "I'll see you at dinner."

I hung up and took my books down to the library to work on the homework I didn't do Friday night since I was out with Alex. I got started right away, working away and then reading when I finished to pass the time. 

I practically jumped when I noticed the time and scrambled to get my books together before I missed dinner. I made my way down to the dining hall just in time to be served, sitting with the girls.

"I heard that there's going to be this autumn dance they're holding," Eleanor said. 

"Where did you hear that from?" Eileen asked.

"Everyone is talking about it!" she said. "I wonder who everyone is going to ask."

"Well I hope I get asked by the boy in my science class," Eileen said, smirking.

"You have to ask Karen!" I said to Blair, who blushed at the mention of her name.

"Maybe... I don't know."

"She gave you her number! She has at least a little interest in you," I said.

"Well I personally hope I get asked by Professor Hemmings," Eleanor said, her voice hushed as she giggled after saying it.

"Oh stop it," Eileen giggled too, swatting her arm. I rolled my eyes at my goofy best friend.

"We all know Alex is going to ask Daisy, so that's not really a question," Eileen said, smiling at me and I smiled a little back.

"Hopefully he doesn't get sick of me and break up with me by then," I said back playfully, us girls laughing and enjoying our easygoing dinner.


	9. Chapter 9

As I was walking with Eleanor to our last class of the day on Tuesday afternoon, I felt a buzz of excitement through everyone in the hallways. I sat down in my usual spot next to Eleanor and Alex came and set in the seat next to me, greeting me with his usual kiss to my cheek. 

Professor Hemmings was writing on the white board until the bell rang, setting down his pen and calling the class to his attention as a couple last minute students who were always late scrambled for their seats before he took attendance.

"Okay, class settle down," he said. "I have a few things I need to talk about before we get started."

The silence finally settled over the class and Professor Hemmings held up a paper, readjusting the glasses on his nose. "I have a message from Headmistress Morris that I've been asked to share with you."

Everyone already knew what it was; the word had been slipped the night before at dinner and everyone was already buzzing with excitement at what was to come.

"There has been a scheduled Autumn Dance for the students here exactly three weeks from this Saturday," he said. A bunch of kids started whispering anxiously throughout the class, and Professor Hemmings held his hand up for silence. "Students are allowed to leave town on Saturdays to shop for outfits for the dance but only with the accompaniment of a professor here at the school. The dance will be free to students, but if you do not wish to attend the dance you will either be supervised in the library by a professor or in your dormitories." 

The students in our class all started talking among each other, probably beginning to make plans but Professor Hemmings, again, silenced everyone.

"You can make plans for shopping for your dress or asking others to the dance later," he said. "I have a class to teach and the next person to interrupt my teaching with talk about this dance will earn themselves detention. Now, please open your books and turn to page 987."

-

"I knew there was going to be a dance!" Eleanor said, her elbow linked in mine as we walked to the library after class to do our homework. "I'm so excited, I'm going to get the most beautiful dress!"

"I never doubted there was going to be a dance anyways," I said. "We have them every couple years, the last time we had one was Year 10."

"Oh yeah, we did didn't we?" She said. "Wasn't that the time that one guy asked you and you went with him? Wasn't he one of Alex's friends too?"

"Ick, don't remind me," I said. "There was a reason I never dated him again after that night."

Eleanor laughed, bringing her voice down so only I could hear her. "Well I know that Alex is going to ask you, but I'm certainly hoping for Professor Hemmings to ask me to follow him to his office."

"You are such a whore!" I whisper yelled at my best friend, who only giggled loudly as we walked into the library, earning an obnoxious "SHHH!" from the librarian, spit flying through the air in front of her.

"Sorry!" Eleanor whispered loudly, pulling me to sit down at a table, though we were both still giggling as we pulled our books out to begin our homework.

Before long, we were joined by Blair and Eileen, who were both talking about the dance when they joined us as well. 

"You have to ask Karen!" I said excitedly to Blair, who turned pink at the mention of Karen's name.

"I don't know, I just met her," she said. "She transferred from another school and I still don't know if she even knows that I'm not just trying to be friends with her."

"But you two have been on a couple 'study dates' haven't you?" Eileen said, using air quotations around the words "study dates."

"What do you mean by that?" Blair asked defensively.

"We all know you've just been flirting with her the entire time," Eleanor said, nudging her and making her turn even more pink.

"Okay, okay fine!" she groaned, rolling her eyes. "I'll ask her."

"I on the other hand, am not concerned about having a date because I do not need a date to have fun at a dance," Eileen said with an air of superiority. 

"I'm sure there'll be plenty of boys to dance with that have been ditched by their own dates or are going dateless that we can dance with anyways," Eleanor said. 

"Or we could dance together!" Eileen suggested.

"Or we could sneak off together with Hemmings and have a three-way in his office," Eleanor wiggled her eyebrows at Eileen.

"Oh, I like the sounds of that even more," Eileen winked back at Eleanor, and Blair and I rolled our eyes at them. 

"Either way," Eileen said. "I'm just excited to find an elegant dress and hopefully be able to do you girls' makeup?"

"Of course!" I said, smiling at Eileen and the joy it brought her to hear it from not only me, but then Blair and Eleanor as well.

We finally got to our homework, but I'd been falling behind in one class so the other girls finished before I did. 

"You guys go ahead, I'm just going to finish up my philosophy homework," I said.

"Are you sure? We can wait for you," Eleanor said.

"I'm fine, really," I said, smiling at the girls. "I'll see you guys at dinner."

As I was finishing up the last of my homework and packing up my bag, I saw a familiar face approaching me.

"Hi Alex," I smiled, taking my bag and pulling it over my shoulder. 

"Hello Daisy," he smiled back, reaching and taking my bag from my shoulder and pulling me in for a hug. "The girls told me you were still at it."

"Yeah," I rolled my eyes. "Professor Irwin really doesn't understand the concept that I do have homework from other teachers."

"That's okay." Alex interlaced his fingers with mine and walked out of the library still carrying my bag. "Dinner is in less than 10 minutes so I'm sure the girls are already in the dining hall."

"Probably," I said. "Eleanor likes to be first served."

Alex chuckled as we walked the corridor to the dorm buildings for me to drop my bag before we headed to the dining hall.

"Well listen, Daisy, there was something I wanted to talk to you about," he said as we walked up the stairs to my floor. 

"Oh," I said, frowning as my stomach turned over, wondering what it could possibly be.

"No, it's nothing bad," Alex assured me, laughing a little at my anxiety. "It's good actually."

"Oh, okay," I sighed of relief a little bit. "Well what is it?"

"Well, you see, there's this Autumn Dance coming up in a few weeks," he said, smiling at me as we stopped in front of my dorm. "And I was wondering if you would be my date for it."

"Me?" I said back, playfully shocked as his question. "Why would you want to go with me?"

"To be completely honest, it's because I know you're kind of a loser and I felt bad," he shrugged, though he was still smirking and I could see the playfulness in his eyes.

"Hey!" I swatted his shoulder, though I was laughing at our banter as well.

Alex leaned in and pressed a short, soft kiss to my lips.

"Yes, I would be delighted to be your date for the Autumn Dance," I smiled, pulling out my key to unlock my dorm.

"Well I'm delighted that you said yes!" Alex said, waiting patiently as I stepped inside and set my bag down on my bed, then walked back into the hallway with him.

"Well I'm delighted that you asked me!" I giggled, walking with him towards the dining hall.

"Well I'm delighted that they decided to have a dance so that I could ask you!" Alex replied.

"Well I'm delighted that--"

"Enough!" he laughed as we approached the dining hall.

"Fine," I sighed and rolled my eyes, but we were still smiling at each other.

"Will you see you before you head to your dorm after dinner?" he asked as we stopped outside the dining hall.

"Of course," I smiled, leaning up and giving him a quick kiss before we turned the corner and walked inside, parting ways to go to our separate tables.


	10. Chapter 10

By the end of the week, Alex and I had decided that the color we wanted to match at the Autumn Dance was emerald green, and Eleanor and I signed ourselves up to go dress shopping on that upcoming Saturday. My parents mailed me money to get a dress that week, which arrived in a small black envelope on Friday. I recognized my mom's round cursive writing with my name written on it in silver ink, a pen I'd watched her use countless times that never seemed to run out of ink.

As Eleanor and I walked through the mall we'd been escorted to and looked at different dresses, my philosophy teacher, Professor Irwin was our chaperon. He hung out behind us, not really interested in our conversations and was more into conversation with Eleanor's history teacher, Professor Clifford.

"I am just so glad we didn't get stuck with stupid Professor Hemmings," I said as we headed towards the store with all the party dresses. "He'd probably make some stupid sarcastic comment about how lame school dances are just to make himself feel superior to everyone around him, as always."

"Well I'm only glad he didn't chaperon us that way he wouldn't see the dress I'll be wearing the night of the dance," she said, nudging me with her elbow and I quickly turned to make sure Irwin and Clifford didn't hear. Thankfully, they were both too wrapped up in their own conversation to pay any attention to ours.

"Oh stop being so paranoid and loosen up, Daisy," she said. "Have you been spending too much time around Alex?"

"Probably," I said, laughing a little at my silly paranoia. Who cares if they heard anyways? I'm pretty sure they've both had affairs with students at the school too. All the young teachers have.

"So what color are you and Alex looking for?" Eleanor asked as we walked into the store, immediately overwhelmed by the beautiful dresses all around us.

"Emerald green," I informed her. "What color are you looking for?"

"I'm thinking burgundy," she said. "It's such an elegant, autumn color."

"I think you would look great in it," I nodded. She flipped her black hair off her shoulder dramatically, turning to look at dresses lined up perfectly next to us.

After a good fifteen minutes of looking, Eleanor finally found a dress to try on and another five minutes, I found one for me. We both headed to the fitting rooms and tried on the dresses, seeing how they looked on each other.

Eleanor walked out of the stall, looking stunning as ever in her strapless burgundy dress, which was fitted in the top with a sweetheart collar and swept out past her hips, complimenting her small frame perfectly. The deep burgundy was such a stark contrast against her pale skin that it just made her look even more gorgeous, she was literally glowing.

"Eleanor, that dress is perfect. You have to get it," I said. 

"You could say the same for that one!" She said. I looked in the mirror at my own fitted emerald green dress. It had a simply collar of the solid emerald green, but a sheer green layer over the top and up to my neck, covering my cleavage and the rest of the dress laid the same as Eleanor's, except that hers was more silky and mine had the sheer cover on all of it. 

"Then it's settled!" I said excitedly, hurrying back into the dressing room to change into my other clothes.

I browsed around and found a shirt in Alex's size with the same color as my dress and bought that for him since that's all he really needed new. When Eleanor and I were finished, we headed back to the dorms to be met with Eileen and Blair practically pouncing on us to model our dresses for them.

They were hooting and hollering so loud when we came strutting out of the bathroom together, I'm sure the girls in the dorms around us probably thought there was a zoo in our room. Eileen and Blair were going to shop for dresses during the next weekend because all of the professors had been reserved for this first weekend already, despite the large number of girls that didn't go because they were waiting to be asked before they went shopping with their dates to find a dress.

"I can't wait for the dance! It's going to be so much fun!" Eileen practically squealed, bouncing on her bed while holding her teddy bear. 

"But I have really great news to share with you guys!" Blair said. "I already told Eileen while you guys were gone because I couldn't hold back and wait!"

"Well spill it!" Eleanor said, jumping onto Blair's bed with her.

"Okay..." she stopped, building a dramatic pause before Eleanor and I practically screamed at her.

"Okay!" she giggled. "I asked Karen to go to the dance with me and she said yes!"

"Yes! I knew she would!" I yelled, Eleanor and I both tackling Blair into a hug.

"Okay, yeah, yeah, I know you were right," Blair rolled her eyes at me. "But I'm so excited!"

"You should be!" Eleanor said. "But let's go be excited at dinner, because it starts in 10 minutes and I'm hungry!"

There seemed to be an excitement everywhere we walked all weekend. There wasn't a single student in the school that wasn't excited for this dance.


	11. Chapter 11

Mondays have never been my thing, just like most people. And even with all the excitement from the Autumn Dance buzzing through the air, nothing could get me out of my bad Monday morning mood, even by the afternoon and the final class of the day, where my bad Monday morning mood had turned into an out of patience rampage that Professor Hemmings was my main target for.

He stood in front of the class teaching, and I was so fucking annoyed by him. His stupid blue eyes and those stupid glasses he wears, and his stupid arms and the way he rolled up his stupid sleeves and the way his stupid shirt fit tightly against his stupid chest. I hate him. I hate everything he does.

"What about you, Daisy?" he suddenly called on me, pulling out of my annoyed trance with picking at every single little thing he did wrong, ever.

"What about me?" I asked, almost rolling my eyes.

"What was your opinion on Macbeth, now that we have finished the entire play and have taken a test?" he asked, clearly just trying to pick on me because I wasn't paying attention.

"Macbeth, what a wonderful tale of a man with a lot of ambition and a little shitty luck," I rolled my eyes. "He was stupid for thinking he could get away with any kind of murder in the first place, and it got to his head. And then he went crazy from guilt. He should have just let the fate seek itself out, but no, the dumbass had to go and try to force things to happen by--"

"Okay, that is enough," Professor Hemmings said, cutting me off.

"But I wasn't finished," I said, crossing my arms and glaring at him.

"Your use of language was strong enough, now if you talk back to me once more you will have detention."

"Don't ask for my opinion if you can't handle it," I mumbled.

"30 minutes after class, Williams."

I rolled my eyes and picked up my pen, scribbling in the margins. Eleanor giggled next to me, obviously amused by my quick wit but Alex on the other side of me looked rather unhappy.

The class dragged on and on, and I kept my mouth shut for the remainder of it simply because I didn't want to spend Monday evening with this asshole and then on top of that spending longer than necessary in the library doing homework.

When the bell rang for class to end, Alex quickly got up and left without looking at me. I frowned, wondering why he'd left so quickly and didn't say goodbye or anything like he normally does.

"Work on your homework, Miss Williams," Professor Hemmings said once the class was empty, erasing the lecture from the board like he normally does. "And sit in the front row, please."

I rolled my eyes even though his back was turned to me and silently moved my belongings to the front row of the classroom, plopping down and staring at my book and notes in front of me.

I sighed, trying to focus on what I was reading but distracted by the thought of Alex being upset with me. I didn't know what I did. Was it because I got detention? Did he think I was too outspoken with my opinion? He told me he loved my confidence in calling people out and putting things blunt, so why would he leave like that without any explanation?

"Daisy, why aren't you doing your homework like I asked you to?" Professor Hemmings interrupted my thoughts, standing in front of me and seeming to tower over me.

"I am doing my homework, Professor Hemmings," I said, gritting my teeth.

"Then why are you still on the first page of the reading, there is nothing written on your paper and you have been sitting there supposedly doing your homework for 10 minutes already?" He crossed his arms in front of me.

"I work at my own pace, thank you very much," I snapped, slamming my book shut.

"You might want to watch your attitude with me or you'll be here all night," his face was turning a little pink and I knew I was making him mad.

"I'm so sorry that you can't handle someone knocking your ego down a few notches so you don't walk around acting all superior to everyone else just because you think you know it all," I snapped back at him, watching smoke practically shoot out his ears.

"I have authority over you, Daisy and I will not tolerate you speaking to me this way," his voice sounded calm but I knew better.

"Authority based on what? The fact that you're my teacher?" I scoffed. "I am not just any silly student taking this class. I happen to have the highest grades out of anyone in my entire year, I'm pretty sure I have some authority based on the fact that I'm intelligent and know that more than half the garbage you teach us is complete bullshit and Professor Henderson knew that and didn't pretend that this was all actual useful information!"

Professor Hemmings stared down at me for a moment, then leaned forward over me, close to my face. I leaned back slightly in my chair from his closeness, my heart pounding in my chest. I could feel his warm breath fan over my neck as he peered over his black framed glasses with his piercing blue eyes and spoke to me with a voice that sent chills down my spine.

"I am not here just for the pay, Daisy," he said calmly. "I am here because what I am teaching is in fact useful information and if you took a second to listen and pay attention to what I have been teaching rather than sit with your stubborn attitude and defy me the entire class, you might have a clue what I am talking about. Now I suggest you sit down like the good little straight-A student that you are and do your homework before I fail you and ruin any chance you have at getting into uni."

He calmly stepped back, opened my book back up to the page with the reading, used his long index finger to push his glasses up his nose and turned around to walk back to his desk and sit down.

I looked down at the page, looking back up at Professor Hemmings scribbling on papers he was grading and turned back down to the book, beginning to read the first paragraph.

-

My detention seemed to last forever since Professor Hemmings decided to restart my detention after our argument and I ended up frantically searching for Alex before dinner, trying to find him to talk about why he walked away without saying anything earlier.

When I had about 5 minutes before dinner was to be served, I gave up and quickly dropped my books in my dorm before I headed down to the dining hall. I saw Alex sitting at his table with his friends but chickened out and avoided eye contact before I sat down with the girls and waited to be served.

The girls mostly talked about boys in their classes while Blair told them about how Karen sat next to her in science now so she got to flirt with her even more, and I tried to engage in the conversation but couldn't muster the enthusiasm.

"What's wrong?" Eleanor asked me when Eileen and Blair were arguing about whether boys or girls were cuter.

"What do you mean?" I asked, trying to smile.

"You've hardly said more than 5 words this entire conversation and you keep picking at your food. Tell me what's going on," she said.

I sighed, knowing I couldn't hide it from my best friend. "I think Alex is mad at me."

"What? Why would you think that?" she asked.

"I don't know. He left without even looking at me after English and he ignored my texts earlier when I was trying to look for him."

"What would he be angry about?" she asked.

"I don't know, it all started in English. We were fine yesterday and even this morning and before class."

"Well, you need to eat more than that, first of all," she said. "And then you should go talk to him after dinner to see what he's really upset about."

I sighed, knowing she was right. I ate as much as I could before my stomach refused to handle any more food.

I stood and met with Alex at the door just as he was leaving with his friends.

"Alex, can we talk?" I asked and he turned around to face me, then turned back to his friends and told them that he would meet them in their dorm.

"What is it?" he asked, walking with me outside the dining hall to section of the hallway farther away from all the students around us that were heading up to their dorms for the night.

"Are you upset with me?" I asked.

"Why do you ask?" he asked me.

"You ignored my text earlier and didn't even look at me after English," I said. "There's something wrong and I want you to be honest with me and tell me."

"Are you being honest with me?" he asked, suddenly turning on me.

"What? Of course I am, why wouldn't I be?" I said.

"There's nothing you're hiding from me?"

"Of course not, what would I have to hide?"

"Oh I don't know, something with Professor Hemmings?" he said, clearly a little irritated.

"Excuse me?!"

"It seems a little suspicious, Daisy," he said, bringing his voice down. "You are always getting detention in his class, and you never seem to learn from it and keep doing it over and over again."

"Maybe because he's an annoying asshole?" I said, appalled that he would accuse me of something like that.

"I don't know, Daisy." He looked away from me. "People are talking."

"About what?!"

"You. They all think you're fucking Hemmings."

"Why would I?!" I crossed my arms. "And you're believing all of those rumors about me?"

"This isn't just about you, Daisy," he snapped. "I get the reputation as the piece of garbage that you're 'dating' to cover up what you're actually doing with your fucking English professor."

"Oh, so now you're worried about your reputation?! How could you say or even think all of these things about me?! Do you think I'm not happy in this relationship I thought we had?"

"Daisy, I didn't mean it like that--"

"Oh, save it!" I felt tears coming to my eyes. "I can't believe you really think I'm that kind of person!"

"Daisy!" I turned and hurried away from him, his hand wrapping around my wrist but I wiggled out of his grip and lost myself in the crowd of students as I hurried away from him and into my dorm.

I wiped my tears away before I stepped inside my dorm, but I wasn't fooling any of my friends. They all immediately pounced on me, asking me what happened. I brushed them off and said I didn't want to talk about it right then and just wanted to go to bed.


	12. Chapter 12

I wasn't ready to deal with Alex drama Tuesday morning when I walked into the dining hall, knowing I looked like shit. Concealer can only do so much about the dark circles under your eyes, and mine were unfortunately worse than any amount of makeup I could put on.

I sat down without even looking at Alex, waiting to be served. The girls were chatting quietly, and I kept my mouth shut and ate my breakfast without saying much. I was mostly just listening to the conversations around me and trying to keep my mind off of my fight with Alex. I was clearly not anywhere in the wrong; he was the one making assumptions about an inappropriate and nonexistent relationship with my teacher. It was simply pathetic that he thought I was cheating on him, especially with some asshole like Professor Hemmings.

Of course, he ignored me all throughout breakfast and I went to my first class without speaking a word to him. I actually went the entire day like this and kept quiet when I walked into English. Alex sat in the front, away from where he usually sits next to Eleanor and I. I rolled my eyes at how immature he was being even though I was actually hurt that he was still convinced of me whoring around with my teacher.

I kept my mouth shut in English and Professor Hemmings didn't call on me for anything. Eleanor and I walked to the library together after class to work on our homework while I knew Blair was helping set up this guy who was planning on asking Eileen to the Autumn Dance. The thought of the dance made me sick to my stomach knowing that my date thought I was cheating on him.

"What happened last night?" Eleanor asked me after we'd been working on our homework for a little bit, quietly gossiping about these girls in our English class who were always trying to get Professor Hemmings' attention by hiking up their skirts and loosening the buttons on their shirts to show cleavage. Those girls were clearly trying to get something from him, yet I'm the one who has rumors going around about fucking Hemmings?

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You came into the dorms last night and you had clearly been crying after you went to talk to Alex," she said. "What was that about? Did you guys break up?"

"I don't know," I sighed. "It's all so stupid."

"What went wrong?"

"He thinks I'm fucking around after class during detention with Hemmings." I rolled my eyes. "Like, he tried to tell me that there were rumors going around about it and that it was affecting HIS reputation, like he cared so much about his reputation and not about our own relationship and standing up for the fact that he should know I'm not like that?"

"I don't know, Daisy," Eleanor said.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked, my stomach dropping.

"I mean, yeah it was kind of a dick move for Alex to complain about his reputation being ruined but he does have a point," she said slowly.

"What the hell are you talking about?" I asked, getting upset. "You don't seriously think that I'm actually doing that?"

"You just get detention so often." She looked down. "I mean, he's right, Daisy. People are talking, especially knowing the reputation you have and the fact that he's a new, young teacher."

"My reputation?" My jaw dropped. "Are you calling me a whore?!"

"No, Daisy!" She sighed, trying to reach for my arm as I packed up my bags.

"Don't." I yanked my arm away from her hand and she looked hurt.

"Daisy, I didn't mean to infer that you were a whore."

"Well next time, don't infer it, just fucking tell me if that's really what you all think of me," I snapped, slinging my bag over my shoulder and storming out of the library.

-

I ignored pretty much everyone all week.

I didn't say a word to Eleanor or Alex after our fights. When I was served for meals, I took my food and sneaked into the bathroom, sitting in the stall and eating it. I sat in the very back away from anyone else in all of my classes. Professor Hemmings left me alone all week, thankfully. Eleanor tried to text me asking to talk but I deleted her message without even reading it.

It's not like I went sleeping around with just anyone. In fact, I hardly ever actually did anything with anyone, and if I did I was committed to them, like Alex and I were. I hadn't actually had sex with that many people before either, just Alex and another guy I dated the year before. I went to a party the summer after Year 10 and got a little messed up and made out with some girl, but that was all I'd ever done. I couldn't believe that Eleanor would be calling me out on my "reputation" when it wasn't my fault that girls just hated me because their boyfriends all have a crush on me so they felt the need to spread rumors about me.

Friday evening, I was in a corner of the library concealed from view of people walking in working on my homework so no one would try to come and talk to me. I planned on still ignoring all of the girls all weekend and probably Alex too, just to spend time by myself and not worry about people thinking I'm such a whore.

However, my plan for becoming a recluse was executed when Eileen came into the library and sat next to me where I was doing my homework.

"Hello Daisy," she smiled at me, giving me a small side hug.

"Hey Eileen," I said, sighing and setting my pen down from my homework.

"I've noticed that you've been kind of down in the dumps all week," she said. "And I would really be happy if you would come dress shopping with us tomorrow. I can put your name in our group still."

"I don't want to--"

"Come on, Daisy," she said. "Eleanor won't be there so you can work things out with her later. Blair and I both want you to come along, we both agree you need a day away from everyone and everything you've been stressing out about all week."

I sighed again.

"Please?" She batted her long eyelashes at me, smiling and laying her head on my shoulder.

"Fine," I said. "But only because I don't want to run into Eleanor or Alex this weekend."

"Yay!" she clapped happily and the librarian sitting behind the desk shushed her, and she whisper-yelled a "sorry" back to her.

"Come on, bookworm, I'll eat with you in the bathroom for dinner."


	13. Chapter 13

I had to practically drag myself out of bed Saturday morning to go with Eileen and Blair to get their dresses with them. I walked with them to the train we were taking into town and engaged as best as I could in their conversation.

"So, Karen said that her favorite color on me was that plum jumper I wore last week," Blair said. "And she she said she thinks royal blue compliments it well and wants to get a royal blue dress for hers."

"Well I can certainly help you out with that," Eileen said. "I'm so excited that Bryan asked me to the dance, I was honestly hoping he would."

Eileen continued to gush about the boy from her science class that she'd been flirting with a lot lately and I was honestly happy for her, I was just still a bit "down in the dumps" about Alex.

As we were shopping, Blair tried on a few different dresses but Eileen and I agreed that the best one was a short fitted plum dress with a sparkly strap that went around the top of the breast. It complimented her curves perfectly and it looked amazing on her.

"Come on, Daisy, you've got to spill and tell us what keeps bothering you," Eileen said as we made our way to another store to look for Eileen's dress.

"I'm just worried," I said. "Alex seemed so mad about something that didn't even happen, and looking at dresses is only making me feel worse. I'm afraid he's going to break up with me and call off all our plans for the Autumn Dance."

"I'm sure he won't do that," Eileen said.

"Honestly, I think it's total bullshit that everyone is spreading those rumors about you," Blair said. "And I can't believe that Eleanor and Alex both think that you would actually do something like that."

"And if Alex is truly worthy of your love, he will come to his senses and realize that this is all just a silly mistake and that he shouldn't believe just everything he hears," Eileen said. "If he doesn't realize that, then he's honestly just not worth your time."

"I suppose you're right," I said. "I'm just afraid."

"Well you know that Blair and I are both here for you," Eileen said, putting her arm around my shoulder and Blair's. "And I'm sure once El realizes that she's horribly wrong she will be too."

"I hope so," I said. We had entered another store and my eyes caught this gorgeous light blue dress. "Oh my god, Eileen you have to try on that dress."

Eileen excitedly ran for the dress, pulled it off the rack and ran to a fitting room to try it on. She stepped out, the cute strapless party dress puffed out slightly around her hips like a cute tutu.

"Eileen, that looks so perfect with your eyes," I said, honestly meaning the compliment. The blue matched her eyes and made them pop.

"I think this is the one, girls," Eileen giggled, spinning around a little in it. "I want this one."

"It looks fantastic on you," Blair said. "You have to get that one."

Once Eileen bought her dress, we headed back to the school on a train. I decided that although I had fun with Eileen and Blair, I still wanted the afternoon to myself. I went to the cafe in the town next to the school and bought myself some tea and sat down to read a book I'd checked out from the library. I was ready to forget my own problems and just submerge myself into another life where I didn't have to worry about my problems with Alex or Eleanor or Professor Hemmings.

I'd only just gotten into the first few pages of my book when someone sat down in the chair across from me. I looked up to see none other than Alex himself sitting across from me.

I looked down at my book again before he asked, "Can we talk?"

"About?" I peered up from my book at him, wondering what he could possibly want to talk about.

"I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry," he said. "It was completely wrong for me to accuse you of cheating on me, especially with your teacher and I should have known better than to think that you'd do that. I guess I was just too in my head to realize that I really am lucky to have you and I know that you'd never cheat on me, especially not with your teacher."

"Thank you for finally realizing that and apologizing to me," I said.

"I want you to know that I'm really sorry for the way I acted out and I want us to go back to normal," he said. "I really am a lucky guy and I should appreciate my beautiful girlfriend more."

"Well when you put it that way," I smiled, blushing a little.

"So the boys wanted to go do something but I think I owe it to you to spend the afternoon with you instead," he said. "Do you want to go get some ice cream or something?"

"I would actually really like that," I said, standing up and sipping the last of my tea.

Alex took my hand and walked with me toward the ice cream shop in town, a little relief lifted from my chest about the entire situation.

-

Once I'd gotten home from spending time with Alex, I was in a much better mood than I was before.

I sat with our table again at dinner, feeling a bit more social than before. I sat with Eileen and Blair because I still hadn't made amends with Eleanor, but that would come in time.

I made my way up to my dorm after dinner and heard someone calling my name.

"Daisy! Wait up!" I turned around and saw Eleanor rushing up the stairs to meet me.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey, listen Daisy I'm really sorry," she said. "You were right, and I'm a horrible best friend for even inferring that you were anything like that."

"You aren't a horrible best friend, El," I said. "I forgive you."

"What I did wasn't what a best friend should do," she said. "I'm sorry and I want us to be back on good terms."

"We can be," I put my arm around her shoulder. "I forgive you. Alex and I worked things out too."

"I'm really glad to hear that," she said. "And I'm sorry I wasn't there for you this week when you needed me."

"Let's leave that in the past," I said. "I just want to focus on the future."

"Okay," she said. "I'm right there with you."

I made it to my room, laying in bed feeling much better. I was feeling so much better that not even Professor Hemmings could make me feel unhappy at that point.


	14. Chapter 14

Although I'd made up with Alex and Eleanor, it didn't change how nervous I was about everything now. Now that I knew people were talking about me and saying ungodly things about Professor Hemmings and I, I walked on eggshells around everyone. Honestly, I didn't care what anyone thought about me most of the time but this was way overboard. I had a reputation as being a few different things that probably weren't ideal, but I wouldn't tolerate having the reputation as "the girl who is fucking her English professor that she pretends to hate."

The thing is, I didn't pretend to hate Professor Hemmings. I truly hated him. He was a dick and acted like he knew everything. Despite the fact that I loathed him and wanted to pick at every little thing he did wrong, I kept my mouth shut after I made up with Alex and Eleanor. And let me tell you, it was hard to filter myself like that.

On the Friday afternoon before the Autumn Dance was going to be held on Saturday, the bell rang signaling that my final class of the day was over and that I could go to my dorm and relax or perhaps going into the neighboring town with Alex for some ice cream or watch a movie with the girls. I sighed and gathered my books, happy to finally be leaving this class.

"Daisy, could I speak with you for a moment?" Professor Hemmings said, taking my attention away from Alex, who was talking to me.

"I'll meet up with you by my dorm in a few minutes, you can go ahead and put your stuff away," I informed him.

Alex looked between Professor Hemmings and I, and I almost glared at him and bitched him out for thinking there was actually something going on, but he smiled at me instead.

"Okay, love," he leaned in and gave me a quick kiss. "I'll see you in a bit."

I walked up to Professor Hemmings, who was shuffling some papers around on his desk. He looked up at me, then at the students leaving his class and pushed his glasses up his nose like he always does.

"I couldn't help but notice a significant change in your attitude again, Miss Williams," he said, tapping a stack of papers on his desk to straighten them out before putting a paper clip on them and setting them down, looking me directly in the eye.

"You are certainly correct about that," I said in a monotone voice, biting back a sarcastic comment rising in my throat about how it's the only thing he's correct about.

"I have also noticed that this change in attitude has been somewhat consistent," he continued, still staring me right in the eyes.

I nodded, saying nothing more to him but keeping his intense stare.

"I suppose I am just trying to say that I greatly appreciate it and would like to see it continue," he said. "I think now that you've stopped making those comments of yours that you have been doing quite well with the classwork."

"Thank you, sir," I said, my voice still monotone. "Am I excused?"

He stared at me for a second. "Yes." He said it almost as if he were questioning my answer or my responses to him. I turned around and walked out the door without saying another word, feeling his eyes on me the entire way out.

-

The following night, I managed to relax while I let Eileen do my makeup, turning my face into a canvas of artwork. She also insisted on doing my hair, so I let her do that as well, and actually enjoyed myself laughing with the girls as we all got ready together.

Once we'd all put our dresses on, excitedly gushing over how pretty we all looked, we headed down to the dining hall to meet up with our dates for the dinner to start right before the dance.

I spotted Alex and started walking towards him when I saw him before he noticed me. When he turned from laughing with his friends, he stopped and looked at me, his eyes going up and down my body.

"Wow," he said when I reached him. "Daisy, you look beautiful."

"Thank you, Alex," I said, blushing under his compliments.

I sat with him for our dinner, where the girls were also sitting with their dates and laughing and eating. Alex looked so good in his dress clothes I almost had to loosen my dress because of how hot and flushed I felt.

Once the dance had started, everyone was having fun messing around with each other. We were all dancing like a bunch of idiots, none of us were actually any good at dancing so we were all laughing at how dumb we looked together. I took a break from my own dancing and headed off to the punch table.

Alex followed me, out of breath from all the dancing too but had a big smile on his face.

"I'm having so much fun!" I said, taking a sip of my punch and offering some to Alex, who also took a sip. "I don't think I've ever enjoyed looking an idiot so much in my life!"

Alex laughed, wrapping his arms around and I reached and wrapped my arms around his shoulders as well. I leaned in and kissed him, a few seconds long and then pulled away as he leaned his forehead against mine before leaning in for another kiss, this one a little longer.

"Come on, lovebirds," Eleanor pushed through the two of us and reached for a cup of punch and I laughed at her cock-blocking. "Please, if you're going to reproduce find a room to do it, not in the middle of the punch table."

"Oh shut up," I laughed, Alex laughing with me as his cheeks flushed a little.

"Come on, let's go dance more," Alex said, taking my hand and pulling me back into the crowd of people dancing.

After another round of idiotic dancing, a slow song came on and everyone in the crowd started to slow down their dancing, a few moving out of the crowd completely, probably the ones without a date.

I looked around and saw that Eleanor's date had already pulled her in to dance and Eileen's date was taking her hand. I smirked at my friends and thought "get some" to them as Alex reached for my hand and pulled my close to him by the waist.

They have a rule that you're not allowed to be closer than 30 centimeters, but Alex pulled me close to him anyways and, not to be cheeky but I'm pretty sure we'd already been the closest you can get with someone so it was no big deal for us. I rested my arms around his shoulders and neck as he held me around the waist and looked down at me.

"I thought this dance was going to be really lame, but I'm actually having a lot of fun," he said, smiling a little at me.

"So am I," I said. "But I knew it was going to be fun."

The slow song was over before long and the punch seemed to go right through me when it was. The next song that came on wasn't very dance-able anyways, so I excused myself from Alex to use the restroom.

I walked in and saw Eileen was attempting to fix Eleanor's smudged eyeliner, who was laughing so hard she had tears coming from her eyes.

"I'm sorry Eileen!" she said, laughing still. "Just give me a second and I'll be fine!"

"What's so funny?" I asked, laughing at my goofy friends.

"Eleanor is about to pee herself because her date fell on his ass a minute ago," Eileen explained, though she was giggling a little herself. "In fact, that's the reason she came in here in the first place. She literally was about to pee."

"And now I'm just crying a little," Eleanor said, gently catching the tear falling from her eye, taking a deep breath. "Okay doctor, I'm ready to be fixed."

Eileen giggled a little as I stepped into the stall to pee, finishing up and walking to the sink to wash my hands afterwards.

"So how is it going with Alex?" Eileen asked, wiggling her eyebrows at me suggestively.

"We're both having loads of fun," I said, rinsing the soap off of my hands.

"Is someone going to get laid tonight?" Eileen winked at me and I sighed.

"I wish, but not likely," I said. "It's okay though, we're having fun without that sort of thing anyways."

"Well you keep enjoying yourself, doll," Eileen said. "El and I will be back out in a few minutes once I fix this wing."

I laughed at my friends again, heading out the door of the restroom with intentions to be met with my wonderful date again. What I saw, however, made the smile I had on fall right off my face.

My date, my fucking boyfriend, was sitting at a table nearby with some skanky blonde bitch sitting next to him so close she might as well have been on his lap. She was leaned in close to his face, her hand on his chest and the other around his shoulder. He sat looking slightly uncomfortable but didn't appear to making any effort to push her off.

I stood gaping at what was in front of me. I blinked a few times to try and see if I was imagining what I was looking at, but no matter how hard I blinked they were still in front of me, making my blood boil. I was hurt, angry, so upset I couldn't hardly move. I felt a couple hot tears fall from my eyes and was only pulled from my paralyzed state when Alex looked over and saw me, his face then full of concern and stood, pushing the girl off of him and heading towards me, when I turned around to head towards my dorm.

"Daisy!" I heard Alex's voice behind me and I made it all the way to the hallway that lead to the dorms before I turned around and faced my boyfriend.

"What the fuck, Alex?!" I yelled, pushing him back by his shoulders. He stumbled a little, but caught his balance and looked at me surprised that I'd turned around and pushed him.

"What the fuck?!" I yelled again. "I leave to go to the bathroom for less than 5 minutes and some bitch is practically giving you a lap dance!"

"Daisy, listen to me, please," he said, keeping his voice down, though he looked frantic. "Just let me explain."

"Oh, this ought to be good," I scoffed, crossing my arms.

"Listen, I'm so sorry," he said. "I didn't want that, I swear it wasn't my idea--"

"What do you mean it 'wasn't your idea'?!" I yelled, getting angrier and angrier at the image of the two of them that close to each other burned into my retinas.

"I'm really sorry, Daisy, I didn't want to go through with it," he said. "One of the boys, they said they still thought you were hiding things from me because they thought you were being really distant with me and you weren't even interested in me anymore. And for a while, I kinda believed it so he said he was going to send a girl to come make you jealous at the dance, and this was all planned way before we were having so much fun, I promise I never meant for that to even happen, I even texted him and told him not to send her over because I knew--"

"What the fuck?!" I screamed for what felt like the millionth time. "I can't ever do anything to please you, can I?! If I'm trying to be myself, you think I'm fucking my English professor but if I try and be careful and walk on eggshells around you, you think I'm not interested anymore and want to try and test the damn theory by sending some skank to come and get all over you while I'm using the bathroom!"

"Daisy, I swear, I didn't want that to happen--"

"Then why didn't you push her off of you?!"

"I didn't want to hurt her feelings, and he told me to let her do what she was going to because he said he made her promise to not do anything would classify as 'cheating' on you--"

"It doesn't matter if it 'counts as cheating' if you're not pushing her away in the first place!" I turned around, not wanting to even look at Alex anymore. I was so angry, all I wanted to do was scream and cry.

"Daisy, please--" Alex reaching and grabbed my hand but I jerked out of his grip.

"Leave me alone!" I yelled and ran down the hallway into the girls' dorms, practically falling up the stairs trying to get to my own dorm.

I burst through the door, startling Blair, who jumped off of her bed and looked like a deer in headlights at the sight of me coming in, her makeup smeared all over her face.

"Blair--" I stumbled into her arms and we both held each other and cried for a few minutes, before I pulled away and asked her why she was in there crying.

"At the slow dance," she said, sniffling as she wiped away some of her tears. "I asked Karen if she wanted to dance but she said she didn't like me that way. I can't believe I invested so much time and effort into a girl that didn't want me as anything more than a date to some stupid dance!" She continued to cry more, reaching for the tissues next to her bed. "Why did you come in here?"

I explained to her what happened with Alex, and after a while we both managed to stop crying.

"Guys and girls are both stupid," I said, sighing as my last few tears came out and I wiped them away with a tissue.

"Agreed," Blair sniffled, blowing her nose. "Do you want to watch some sappy movie to get our minds off of the horrible night we're both having?"

"Yes," I said, throwing away our pile of tissues before laying next to Blair on her bed after she put a movie in the DVD player and we watched it on the screen.

We weren't 10 minutes into the movie when Eileen and Eleanor came into the room, looking extremely worried.

"There you guys are!" Eileen said, rushing towards us and turning on the light. "Oh dear, what happened?! Blair, you've been crying too?!"

Eleanor and Eileen both came to comfort Blair as she told them what happened with Karen as well, and Eileen helped her to the bathroom to help clean up all the makeup that was everywhere on her face.

"Daisy, you've got to go talk to Alex," Eleanor started.

"No," I shook my head.

"Daisy, he's so frantic out there, he doesn't know what to do and he hasn't stopped calling you," she said. "I've never seen him like this before, he's so distraught."

"Good," I said, crossing my arms stubbornly. "He should be for making an asshole move like that."

"Daisy..."

"No, Eleanor," I said. "I am not talking to him tonight and that is the final word."

"Okay," she sighed. "Can I at least help you get all that makeup off your face?"

I nodded, feeling empty as her cold hand wrapped around my fingers and walked with me into the bathroom to join Eileen and Blair in the removal of tear-ruined makeup. What was supposed to be a perfect night had turned into a complete disaster.


	15. Chapter 15

"Daisy, you've got to speak to Alex," Eleanor said as I pressed ignore on yet another call from Alex.

"No," I said, staying stubborn like I had been all weekend. "I'm not going to talk to him over the phone and I don't want to look at him right now. If he really cares that much about me then he'll show it."

Eleanor sighed and left our dorms and I continued to sit and finish doing my homework that I hadn't done due to the dance the night before.

Monday morning at breakfast, I still sat down without looking at Alex. I think he finally got the hint to leave me alone because he didn't approach me at all before I walked to my first class of the day.

I took my new usual spot in the back on the classroom away from everyone in English, struggling to pay attention and follow all that Professor Hemmings was saying. I saw him eyeing me a few times but luckily left me alone again like I'd wanted.

I'd managed to avoid Alex all the way until I was sitting in the library doing my homework before dinner like I usually did. I finished up the last of it, putting my books into my bag and walking into one of the aisles to find a new book to read since I'd finished the last one.

I felt my phone buzz in the pocket of my bag, so I pulled it out and looked at the message, which was from Eleanor asking if I wanted to watch a movie with her and the girls after dinner. I was about to respond when I walked right into something tall in front of me.

"I'm sorry--" I started to say but stopped when I looked up at the person in front of me. "Actually, no I'm not."

"Daisy, will you please listen to me?" Alex asked in a hushed voice since we were in the library, stepping forward and almost cornering me against the bookshelf behind me.

I sighed, finally giving in and just listening to whatever he had to say. "Fine. Speak."

"I never meant to hurt you, Daisy," he said. "I promise, that was never what I wanted. It's just that I feel there's a wall between us. I feel like you've just been distant with me and I don't want that."

"Well I feel like you don't trust me," I said. "You thought I was screwing around with my English professor and then thought I wasn't interested anymore because I was trying to be cautious of what I was doing so that would stop."

Alex stayed quiet, closing his eyes and resting his hand against his forehead.

"Maybe this just isn't working anymore," I said.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I mean, maybe we should break up."

"No, Daisy please, we can make it work," he said. "We've worked everything out before, we can work this out too."

"I don't know," I said.

"We haven't been communicating our feelings with each other well enough," he said. "That's all it is. Now you know how I feel and I know how you feel."

I looked down, unsure of what I should actually do. I felt Alex's warm hands against my face, tilting my head up to look at him.

"Please, Daisy, I love you and I want this to work out between us," he said. "I'm so sorry, I promise, no more distrust in each other, and no more games with my friends sending girls to make you jealous. Just give me one more chance, please."

I hesitated, and when I saw the pain in Alex's face I felt for a second like I was making the wrong decision. What if Alex truly did care about me and I was about to throw all of that away?

"Okay," I whispered.

He relaxed a little, leaning down and pressing his soft lips to my forehead, then down to my own lips to kiss me.

"I promise, I won't let you down this time," he said quietly before kissing me again.

"Come on, we're going to be late to dinner," I said, allowing him to take my hand and walk out of the library with me.

-

"You seem a little more relaxed," Eleanor said as I walked into the dining hall and sat next to her.

"I am, a little," I said.

"Did you work things out with Alex?" she asked.

"Yeah," I said. "We're okay now."

"That's good," she said. We spotted Blair and Eileen walking into the dining hall then, looking as though they were arguing about something.

"That can't be good," I said, both of us watching as they approached our table.

"But you know, Blair, there was a time in your life when you were extremely confused and didn't know what you wanted either," Eileen was saying. Blair looked a bit distressed.

"What's going on?" I asked.

Blair sat down without saying anything, slumping against her hand once she'd sat at the table.

"Karen talked to Blair and apologized for what happened Saturday night and explained that she just didn't know how she felt about Blair yet," Eileen explained.

"Oh, screw her!" Eleanor said. "Don't waste your time on her if she 'doesn't know how she feels yet.' You're not going to spend your whole life waiting around for her when you have clearly admitted your own feelings for her."

"But Blair of all people should know how difficult it can be to figure out things about yourself and how you feel about other people," Eileen said. "And I think she should give her a fair chance and see where it goes."

Not forming my own opinion on the situation, I began consuming myself in my own thoughts, leaving it to the girls to decide what Blair should do about Karen.

Alex said goodnight to me before I headed to my dorm, where the girls were putting a movie in for us to watch, but I fell asleep less than 20 minutes into it.


	16. Chapter 16

"I want you guys to open your books to page 497 and read those first three paragraphs and then we'll have a class discussion," Professor Irwin, my philosophy teacher said as he walked towards the phone ringing at his desk.

"Hello?... Yes... Yes, she'll be on her way in just a minute." He hung up almost immediately, looking right at me once he did.

"Daisy," he smiled. "Headmistress Morris would like to see you in her office."

The immature class around me made a collective "ooo, someone's in trouble," which I rolled my eyes at and stood from the class and headed out into the hallway.

Professor Irwin was decent. I didn't mind having him teach my philosophy class and I actually enjoyed him as a person a lot. We got along well and I laughed at his awful dad jokes. He was also a pretty young teacher, only in his late twenties, and I know many girls had gone into his office alone with him many times before but I couldn't blame them. He's a very good looking guy.

I wondered as I walked down to the Morris's office what she was calling me in for. The thing that sucked was that my parents kept in close contact with her and were always keeping tabs on me through her, so she was always watching me like a hawk. This was probably something my parents decided to ask her about and now she was going to get on my case about.

I knocked on the door, which was ajar and she called out "come in."

I stepped in quietly, sitting down at the desk in front of her. She was writing something on a piece of paper and then turned and looked at me.

"Good morning, Miss Williams," she smiled. Although she was constantly on my case, she was a very sweet lady.

"Hello," I said back quietly.

"Do you know why you're here?" she asked.

"I'm afraid not, ma'am," I said back, beginning to worry about what it could possibly be.

"It appears that your grade in English has been slipping pretty badly," she said, looking through her papers at my transcript. "Do you know why this might be?"

I stared at her blankly, not saying anything back. She turned away from the papers and looked at me over her glasses.

"Very well," she sighed. "Your parents called me this morning, and I've made a decision that is meant entirely to benefit you and I hope you understand that."

"What is it?" I asked, my heart pounding and my stomach turning over.

"Your parents suggested you go in for tutoring twice a week with your English professor to catch up in the class," she said. "You're falling behind quite a bit. You have Professor Hemmings, correct?"

"No, please don't make me," I said, shaking my head and beginning to panic as though I were at a disco. (Hahaha I'm so funny.) "I'll study more and I'll get my grade up, I promise, anything but that!"

"I'm afraid I've already told your parents that's what I'm going to have you do," she said. "I've also talked to Professor Hemmings and he said he would be delighted to tutor you."

Of course he did. Fucking prick.

"I will do anything but that, please," I begged one last time, though I knew that once Morris had made up her mind, that was the final say.

"I'm sorry, Miss Williams, but this is what I've already decided," she said. "You may go back to class."

I frowned and got up, trudging into the hallway and heading back down to my philosophy class. I almost wanted to cry like a big baby. This was going to be a living nightmare, I already knew.

-

"Hey Daisy, do you want to paint our nails after class tonight?" Eleanor asked me at lunch when we were eating. Well, I was picking at my food, they were eating.

"I can't, I've got this huge test coming up that I have to study for," I lied. I didn't want to admit to Eleanor that I was close to failing my best subject.

"Bummer," she frowned, clearly believing my excuse. "What class?"

"Philosophy," I said. She didn't have the class or the teacher so that one had to be safe.

"Well maybe sometime later this week?" she asked.

"Of course," I smiled, hiding the annoyance I'd been feeling all day at what I knew was going to come after class.

I met Eleanor in English, sitting between her and Alex. The entire class period I spent quietly doing my work, getting well into the passage I was reading and all the notes I was taking.

I kept working when the bell rang, and Eleanor left after wishing me luck on my studying for my philosophy test. I thanked her and also told Alex I had to study for my philosophy test before he tried to approach me.

"Okay, I'll see you at dinner," he said, kissing me on the cheek as he left the classroom.

I only began to put away my notes and book once the classroom had emptied, dreadfully moving my belongings to the front of the classroom.

"Have a seat right there, and I will be finished with this in just a moment. Go ahead and get your book out again." Professor Hemmings was erasing the board like he usually does, shuffling his papers around on his desk. I plopped down on the seat he pointed to, pulling out my book and crossing my arms to pout.

Professor Hemmings sat in the seat next to me, scooting close enough to look at what was in front of me. "Let's start with tonight's homework."

I opened the book to the assignment he had given us for that night, staring down at the page with a scowl on my face.

"I want you to read the first paragraph out loud to me," he said.

"Excuse me?" I looked up from the book to Professor Hemmings.

"I said, I want you to read the first paragraph out loud to me," he repeated.

"I am not going to read it out loud," I said. "I am not in Year 1."

"Daisy, this is not going to work if you are not going to cooperate with what I asked you to do," he sighed, probably annoyed with my attitude coming back after being gone for so long. Serves him right for thinking I'd actually stop mouthing off to him.

"I will cooperate once you stop treating me like a child," I snapped.

"I am not treating you like a child, I am trying to work on your reading comprehension," he said. "Now, will you please just read the paragraph so we can get through this?"

"I am not reading it out loud," I said, crossing my arms.

"Fine, just read it please," he said, rolling his eyes.

I huffed and looked down at the first paragraph, already dreading how horrible these tutoring sessions were going to be.

-

I packed up the last of my things, leaving the classroom and peeking around to make sure no one saw me. I left, turning the corner and bumping right into El, who appeared startled to see me exit Professor Hemmings' classroom.

"Daisy?" she stopped, looking between me and the classroom I'd just walked out of. "You told me you had a test to study for, what the hell?"

"Listen, Eleanor, please keep your voice down." I said, beginning to panic again. "Let me explain."

She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow at me skeptically, but let me proceed talking.

"Headmistress Morris called me into her office this morning and told me that I have to take tutoring sessions with Professor Hemmings after class on Tuesdays and Thursdays because I'm close to failing," I said. "I swear, I would have told you but I'm just so embarrassed, English is my strong suit and I'm on the cusp of having to retake it and not graduate on time." I started crying, and Eleanor immediately pulled me in for a hug.

"Aw, Daisy, you don't have to be embarrassed," she said. "I'm sorry I kind of jumped to conclusions just a minute ago. You know you could have told me and I wouldn't have thought anything of it."

"I know, it's just so embarrassing," I said, letting her continue to hug me. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"It's okay, it's okay," she said, pulling away and wiping my tears away for me. "Let's get back to the dorms and we can hang out with Eileen and Blair for a bit, they're being so goofy and I know they'll make you feel better."

I wiped my cheeks with my hand, nodding and going with Eleanor to the dorms, a little glad I didn't have to hide it from her but still extremely angry that I had to even have the tutoring sessions in the first place.


	17. Chapter 17

November seemed to fly right by despite my exhausting tutoring sessions with Professor Hemmings. Alex and I began to bicker more and more everyday and I tried to just relax and not stress out too much with my annoying pain in the ass boyfriend and my even more annoying, even more pain in the ass English professor. Eventually, Professor Hemmings and I began to get along a little bit better, and I'd occasionally make a few jokes that he'd laugh at, even some of my crude ones.

I pretty much distanced myself from all of the girls as much as possible. I sat with them at meals everyday and kept tabs on their relationships, but stayed in my own world most of the time. I just felt so off and unhappy all the time, and I couldn't figure out why.

After Alex's football game that he won, I congratulated him before he told me he was going to celebrate with the boys and get some ice cream. As I was walking back to my dorm, Eleanor caught up to me and stopped to talk.

"Hey Daisy, do you want to go get some lunch together?" she asked. "We haven't had a real day for us in a while."

"Sure," I said, hiding the fact that I honestly only wanted to lay in my bed and sleep. I smiled and walked with her out of the school grounds and we started the walk into town.

"Blair still doesn't want to get into a relationship with Karen, and she told us that Karen is losing interest and has been talking to other people," Eleanor said. "So she's a little bent out of shape about it and Eileen is pep talking her and convincing her that she doesn't need to be with a girl who can't make up her mind anyways."

"That poor girl goes through so much," I said.

"Yeah, I wish she would stop letting people take advantage of her kindness so much," Eleanor said. "Either way, I think Karen will be out of the picture soon enough and we'll get our good old Blair back."

"That's good," I smiled. I loved Blair, she had an attitude much like mine and I hadn't seen much of it lately.

Eleanor and I walked inside the little restaurant and sat down, waiting for a waitress to come take our order. She picked up a menu and looked over it, trying to decide what she wanted.

"I feel like I always just get a sandwich or salad here," she said. "I think since it's so cold outside I'm going to get some soup."

"Me too," I said, honestly just too lazy to actually look over the menu.

Eleanor put down her menu and sighed, looking at me across the table. "How have your tutoring sessions been?"

"Alright, I guess," I shrugged. "A little more tolerable maybe."

She nodded. "I've noticed you don't tend to mouth off to Hemmings as much in class. Do you guys get along better now?"

"I mean, we're not constantly arguing, if you want to call that 'getting along,'" I said. "He's still an asshole though and I still hate him."

"Outside of the classroom setting I'm sure he's a very nice guy," she said.

"Yeah, well I don't see anything outside of the whole classroom setting so he's a prick," I shrugged. "How have your classes been?"

"They've been fine," she said. "I want to graduate, yesterday."

"Me too," I rolled my eyes. I was so done with this dumb school, I just wanted to go to uni already. Of course, that might not happen with my English grade the way it is.

"Has your grade in English at least gone up?"

"Hardly," I said. "Less than 2%."

"I mean, any improvement is better than no improvement," she offered.

"Yeah," I sighed. "I just want my grade to get back up so that I can just end these stupid tutoring sessions."

Eleanor sighed, a waitress finally coming by to get our order. After she left with our menus, El turned back to me.

"Okay, enough about Hemmings," she said. "How are things with Alex?"

I literally rolled my eyes. "I don't want to talk about him either."

"What happened?" she asked, disregarding my comment. I mean, she is my best friend, she has a right to do that.

"We just never stop bickering over the stupidest things," I said. "I swear, we can't go less than 4 hours without getting into some minor argument and getting annoyed with each other. And he's always asking for time to spend together when he knows I'm busy with tutoring and it just makes me even more anxious about literally everything."

"I'm sure it's just a phase," Eleanor said. I knew she was just trying to be positive for my sake.

"I've been thinking about calling it quits with Alex," I said, taking a sip of the water that had been placed in front of us. "I have too much to think about right now."

"I'm worried about you, Daisy."

"I'm fine, I swear," I said. "I'm just really really stressed right now is all. I'll be fine."

Eleanor didn't look convinced, but she dropped the issue anyways and I was grateful for that.

I felt bad because the rest of the lunch we had together I tried to make fun and be enthusiastic but I couldn't find the energy. I went to bed early that night, wanting to change one too many things.


	18. Chapter 18

Before I had even realized it, Christmas break had come and I was heading home back to my parents and away from Professor Hemmings and all of my problems for a little while. My parents were excited to see me, and hounded me for a few minutes about my English grade but overall tried to make Christmas a fun break for me, and I needed it a lot.

I went back to the school for New Years with Alex and the girls just a few days before school was supposed to start up again. They always do a party that usually goes until about 2 in the morning when all the teachers are grumpy about partying teenagers, which gives the perfect opportunity for some students to sneak into empty classrooms and get laid because all the teachers are too tired to go around monitoring anything.

Considering there weren't many students there when I first got back anyways, the teachers that were there were still watching everyone like a hawk, and unfortunately Professor Hemmings was one of them. The afternoon I got back, he stopped in the hallway to stare at me for a moment before offering to carry my bag up to my dorm for me. I said yes but only because I didn't want to lug it all the way up the stairs.

"Hey Daisy," Alex pulled me in for a tight hug when I met up with him at dinner that night, considering we hadn't seen each other in about a week and a half. He gave me a quick kiss on the lips and sat with me since the girls were supposed to get back the following morning.

"Do you want to go get breakfast tomorrow morning?" he asked me as we sat and ate our dinner, chatting a little and for once not arguing.

"Sure," I said. "What time?"

"Does 9 work?" he asked, and I nodded.

"Perfect," he smiled, leaning in and kissing my cheek.

-

I spent a little extra time in the bathroom that morning, making sure my hair looked nice before I went to meet up with Alex. I walked out and made my way down to the main hall, where we decided we would meet up before we walked out to breakfast together. He held my hand as we walked, in a good mood already, which put me into a better mood.

"How did you sleep?" he asked me when we sat down and had ordered our food. I ordered pancakes of course, I'm surprised I'm not fat because of how much I love pancakes.

"I slept really well, actually," I said. "I've had a lot of trouble sleeping lately but I fell asleep right away and I slept right through the night."

"That's good," he said. "Are the tutoring sessions with Hemmings getting any better?"

"I don't want to talk about him," I said. "He's such a dick, and he isn't important. This is about you and I right now."

"Okay," he smiled. "Well, how about I talk about how cute that sweater is on you. Is it new?"

"Yes," I said, looking down at it. "My parents gave it to me for Christmas."

"I like the color," he said. "It brings out your eyes."

I felt my cheeks heat as I smiled at him across the table.

The majority of our breakfast went like this, plus a whole lot of laughing and having a genuinely good time together, which we hadn't done in a really long time. I was laughing and really happy for the first time in what felt like years, and I even had to wipe away a few tears from laughing so hard. I had just finally had the faith restored in our relationship that I'd been needing, and it felt so amazing until once again something had to stand in the way.

"Hey Alex," a girl with shoulder length hair that honestly looked a little bit like me except that her hair was brown, not red, came and stood at the table looking between Alex and I. His jaw immediately set and I grew confused at what was going on.

"Who's this?" she asked, pointing to me and looking at him curiously. "Is this Daisy? The girl you told me about?"

"Jessica, go away," he snapped, and I was taken back by his rudeness. Alex has never in his life been so rude to a girl.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Nothing is going on, Jessica needs to leave," Alex said, glaring at the girl that was still standing there. I grew even more confused and expected an explanation pretty soon.

"Oh, does Daisy not know?" Jessica asked. "You haven't told her? I thought you would have by now."

"What are you talking about?" I asked her, and she turned to me and smiled, then turned back to Alex.

"Alex, would you care to explain to Daisy what I'm talking about?" she said.

"Jessica, I swear to God, if you don't leave--"

"Alex stop!" I snapped. His face went pale just then and Jessica smirked at him. "Are you going to give me an explanation for what's going on?"

"I asked Jessica to leave," he said, his face turning a little pink, and I knew he was getting angry.

"Why does she need to leave so badly?" I asked.

"Because he doesn't want you finding out," she said.

"Doesn't want me finding out what?" I asked. "Alex, just tell me. I'm not hiding anything from you, why are you all of a sudden hiding things from me?"

"Yeah, Alex, why don't you just tell her?" she said. "Put the poor girl out of her misery."

This couldn't be good.

"Alex." I used my stern motherly tone with him and I saw him frown and look as though he was going to panic, but I knew I'd gotten my way.

"I went to a party a while ago," he said. "That week that we weren't speaking because I thought there was something between you and Hemmings."

Oh god no.

"And Jessica here, was at this party." He stopped and looked down at his hands on the table, Jessica smiling at him. He had a severe scowl on his face. "And she sort of, kissed me."

My stomach dropped.

"Continue," she said.

"There's more?!" I practically gasped. Alex put his hand on his forehead. I felt like my heart rate had picked up to an unhealthy speed and as though I might throw up my breakfast.

"Oh yeah, there's a lot more," she said. "Go on, Alex."

"And so then we made out," he said. "For like only a couple minutes, and then I told her to leave me alone because it wasn't going to happen because I wasn't interested. It took me a while to realize you're the one that I wanted, Daisy, and nothing about that has changed."

"Are you fucking serious?" I stopped, Jessica smirking before she blew Alex a kiss, said a very insincere "sorry" to me and walked away.

"Daisy, I swear, it only happened once and it's not going to happen again."

"You're right," I said, standing up.

"I'm so glad you understand that I'd never cheat on you," he said, trying to stand and take my hand too.

I pulled away. "You're right. You'd never cheat on me because I'm not yours."

"What?" his face fell back into concern again. "What, you're breaking up with me?"

"This was the last straw, Alex," I said. "I did nothing wrong that week! You took yourself an entire week and I thought it was you sorting out for own shit but you were lip locked with some bitch the entire time!"

"But it wasn't like that," he insisted. "I swear, Daisy, I never meant to hurt you and I never meant for anything like that to happen. And it won't happen again."

"I already told you you're right," I said. "It's kinda impossible to cheat on a girlfriend you don't have."

I got up and took my purse, Alex seemingly giving up on trying to convince me. If he knew me well enough, he'd know that when I decide something, my mind is made up for good.

As I walked back to my dorm, I was fuming with anger. I didn't know what else to do, so I just sat on my bed and stared at the ground for a minute before I stood and punched the wall, which was a big mistake.

That's when the tears came. I looked down at my hand that was beginning to swell up but I felt nothing in my hand. The pain was all in my chest.


	19. Chapter 19

New Year's Eve morning, I woke up and noticed I had awful dark circles under my eyes, so I tried to cover it with concealer but nothing could make me look better no matter how much I piled on my face. I went into the infirmary about my hand once my adrenaline had calmed down and told the nurse that I smashed my hand in a door (she clearly didn't believe me but didn't really question me) and luckily I hadn't broken anything, it was only bruised and would be fine within a couple weeks. I trudged to Professor Hemmings' classroom for a tutoring session that Headmistress Morris had insisted on and he was already sitting at his desk, probably preparing some shitty lesson for us to have the day we get back from our break.

"Good morning, Miss Williams," he smiled at me, and I tried to smile back but managed to not roll my eyes for once. It definitely was not a good morning but if that's what he wanted to believe then I wasn't going to be the one to spoil it for him. I didn't have the energy to make some sarcastic remark.

"How has your break been?" he asked me as I set my notebook and textbook on the desk, eyeing my wrapped up hand that I was trying to hide from him.

"Fine," I shrugged. "Yours?"

"It has been well," he said, sitting down next to me and flipping my book open to some practice lesson in the back that he never used in class but always used for these dumb tutoring sessions. I ripped out a piece of notebook paper to write on; this had become a regular routine for these tutoring sessions.

I tried to focus on the lesson and what he was trying to explain to me, but I had to reread things over and over again because I couldn't get the image out of my mind of Alex lip-locked with that bitch while I sat crying over him ignoring me all week. And the fact that he went so long without telling me, hiding it from me and pretending that nothing happened. I wondered how long he had actually been lying to me. He probably was lying about it being the only time, too. He was probably cheating on me for so long.

"He has distaste in the idea of the death penalty," I said, trying to sound like I understood the passage that I'd just read about 20 times but still had no idea what it said.

Professor Hemmings sighed, taking off his glasses and resting his hands against his face. I am hopeless. (Not that I cared that I was stressing him out.)

"Okay," he said. "Let's start with a shorter and more simple passage instead."

Thank god.

He turned a few more pages and I stared at the paragraph long passage that was in front of me. I could read this and interpret it with no problem.

The very first sentence of the paragraph talked about these trees and a forest and I immediately thought back to a time over the summer when Alex took me hiking through this wooded park and we jumped off a waterfall and went swimming, then took me for a drive through all these back roads on the way home, listening to some dumb Indie music that I wasn't actually into but seemed perfect at the time. The night ended in me going home to my parents to tell them I was home but as soon as I was in my bedroom, sneaking Alex through the window and making out, which led to other things that hurt to think about. He probably did those other things with that skanky bitch that was all over him at the Autumn Dance and then with the girl that he was making out with over that week that we weren't talking to each other.

I got through the end of the paragraph and realized I hadn't been paying attention to anything I was actually reading.

"Have you finished reading it?" Professor Hemmings asked me.

"Yes." I read it, but I didn't absorb any of it.

"Okay, what is the author comparing the tree to throughout the entire paragraph?" he asked.

"Um..." I put my hand on my forehead and tried to quickly skim over the paragraph in hopes of finding some bullshit answer that would work. "His first love?"

"Okay." He reached forward and shut the book, folding his hands on the table and sighing.

"I was right?" I asked, turning to him hopefully.

"Daisy, what's going on?" he asked.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, something is wrong," he said. "You are never this unfocused. Please tell me."

"It's none of your business," I snapped, but I burst into tears halfway through my sentence.

I dropped my head down onto the desk, my tears seeming to just pour out of my eyes. Why am I crying in front of Hemmings? This is the most pathetic thing I have ever done. I have officially hit rock bottom.

I felt a warm hand against my back, rubbing my shoulder as I folded my arms around my head, not allowing him to see me in such a vulnerable state. I was supposed to express my dominance over him and there I was crying all over my work like a little bitch.

"What happened, Daisy?" he asked me.

"Alex cheated on me," I sobbed against the paper that was now covered in my snot and tears, my voice probably completely muffled. I didn't even care anymore that I looked like a little wimp, it hurt too much for me to care.

He pulled me up so I was sitting up, reaching over to his desk and handing me a box of tissues. I wiped my eyes and blew my nose, explaining the whole situation to Hemmings, how I went to breakfast with Alex and the girl that was taunting him and how he admitted to making out with some other girl and even my theory about it not being the only time because he had been lying to me for that long then there was probably so much more that he was lying to me about.

"Daisy, you deserve so much better than that," he said quietly as I leaned against his shoulder and cried more, not caring how pathetic I seemed to him at all anymore. He held me against him as I cried, and for the first time I realized how nice he smelled, like a clean cologne but not too overpowering, and it made me even more sad because I hated him and he smelled nice too, he doesn't have the right to that.

Hemmings held me and even rocked me back and forth a little while I cried, calming me down a little in his tight embrace. I eventually stopped crying and closed my eyes, letting myself be comfortable with him for a few minutes, somehow knowing that after this we would probably be at each other's throats again.

"I don't expect you to finish the lesson today," he said quietly, letting me pull away from his embrace as I looked down at my tear-soiled paper.

I sighed, feeling exhausted even though it was hardly noon and stared at the nearly untouched work in front of me.

"I suggest you go spend some time with Eleanor for New Year's Eve and try to get Alex off of your mind," he said. "I know you two are very close and she would do well at putting you in a better mood."

I nodded, knowing he was right (for once). Eleanor was supposed to be back today, and I honestly couldn't wait to see her.

"You are excused," he said, standing and taking my paper to throw away as I put my books into my bag and thanked him quietly before leaving his classroom and heading back to my dorm.

I walked in and Eleanor was already in there, her face bright with a smile when she saw me but immediately fell when she saw I'd been crying.

"Daisy!" she said, running over to me. "Jesus Christ, what happened to you?! What happened to your hand?!"

I sat on my bed next to Eleanor and explained to her everything that happened, excluding what had just gone on during my tutoring session with Professor Hemmings. She listened carefully the entire time, hugging me and telling me it was going to be okay when I finished.

"What a fucking prick," she said, shaking her head as she stood and walked with me to the bathroom to help me clean my makeup-ruined face. "Here I was thinking he was a great guy and he was cheating on you!"

"Whatever," I said. "I don't want to talk about it anymore. I want to spend New Year's Eve with you and the girls and not make it about Alex."

"I understand," she said, nodding as she took a cotton ball and put some makeup remover on it and gently wiped my face with it. "When Eileen gets here I'll tell her to do your makeup for you and we're going to have a swell time tonight without He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named."

"Voldemort?" I said, chuckling a little.

"Yes, exactly," she laughed with me, helping to make light of the situation and I was so grateful for that.

"You don't need him in your life anyways," she said. "You are perfectly fine without him."

I nodded, trying to tell myself the exact things she was telling me in her pep-talk. Before long, all of my makeup was gone and sure enough, Eleanor had me laughing again. Eileen and Blair showed up around noon and met with us for lunch, and Eileen immediately agreed to doing my makeup for New Year's Eve.

I let myself have a good time with the girls that night, trying to forget about Alex and focus on the future instead.


	20. Chapter 20

Although the pain from Alex was initially close to unbearable, it got more and more tolerable as the weeks passed by, much like the pain in my hand from punching the wall. Before long, I was doing much better and I wasn't even thinking about Alex, trying to focus more on school than some stupid boy that was only causing me more stress. If I wanted to get into uni, I'd have to be way more focused and get my stupid grade up in English.

As for Professor Hemmings and I, nothing changed at all after the moment we had when I broke down during the tutoring session. It was as if both of us had completely forgotten that it'd happened, which I wasn't sure how I felt about. I should have been happy because it was pathetic as fuck but I was a little butt hurt that he literally just blew that off like it was nothing. Those were my feelings and it was as if he didn't even care. Who am I kidding? He didn't care, because I hate him and he hates me.

"Miss Williams, would you care to answer?" he asked as I sat and stared at the notes on my paper. Why did he always pick on me when I wasn't paying attention?

"I'll pass," I mumbled.

"That is not an option," he said. "It was more a statement rather than a question. There was no choice, what is the answer?"

"I don't know, Rime of the Ancient Mariner?" I scoffed.

Professor Hemmings' jaw set and he crossed his arms. "Daisy, I know you know the answer to this. Would you please put some actual thought into your answer?"

I stared down at my paper and slumped against my arm, my hand tangling in my hair. "Shakespeare wrote Julius Caesar in 1599," I mumbled.

"Thank you," he said. "If you keep playing games with me like that, you will land yourself a VIP pass to detention."

"Sounds like a pleasant place to me," this snobby, slightly skanky new girl sitting next to me mumbled. Hemmings didn't hear it, and I found myself thankful of that and also annoyed that she made that comment.

I felt a snide comment rising in my throat but I swallowed it back down, knowing that I had to watch myself with detention now more than ever. Since Alex and I were no longer together, he had all the dirt on me that he could spread rumors around that I was fucking Professor Hemmings and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

Surprisingly, I managed to push my way through the rest of the class, grateful that it was Monday and I didn't have tutoring with Hemmings that day. Although my grade was improving and I was doing a lot better in the class, my parents were not going to be satisfied until my grade was back up to a solid A. Ever since Alex and I broke up, I found it easier to not stress out over anything and it was easier to focus on my work rather than worrying about some argument I'd been having with him.

I made my way to the library, working on the homework I'd been assigned that night. None of the girls were there with me, so I figured they didn't have much homework or were procrastinating again.

I made my way to the dining hall with the girls after I'd put my stuff away and found them in the dorm giggling about various things while Eileen finished up the last of her homework. Eileen and Eleanor were both really riled up and giggling about literally everything.

"And did you hear about Jason and Chelsea?" Eileen said, her voice a little hushed as we were walking down the hall. "The ones in Year 11? Professor Hood caught Chelsea giving Jason a blowjob in some closet in the hallways and they both got expelled!"

"I wonder how their parents reacted to that!" Eleanor said, giggling. "I bet they got in so much trouble!"

"My parents would ground me for eternity," Eileen said, nodding. Blair looked uncomfortable, and I sympathized for her.

As we sat down to eat, I saw Eileen and Eleanor checking out Professor Hemmings while he sat down, admiring his ass as he bent to sit into his chair. Eleanor giggled and turned to me.

"Daisy, I love having you in my English class with Hemmings because whenever you say something to piss him off, he does the jaw thing," she said. "And it's just so hot, and everyone enjoys it."

I scowled. For some reason I was extremely annoyed with all the girls in our class fawning over Hemmings and almost rolled my eyes at the thought of it.

"I would be honored to get detention from him," Eileen winked at us, and I scowled even more.

"He is just so attractive," Eleanor gushed. "I do not ever get tired of looking at him. I want him to bend me over his desk and spank me with a ruler."

"How are things with your love life, Blair?" I asked her, and she looked up from where she was slurping up her noodles as if I'd startled her with my question.

"Oh," her face turned bright red. "Um, nothing."

"Blair, I know when you are lying!" Eileen said, leaning forward and Blair looked extremely put on the spot. "Tell us everything now!"

"Okay, okay," she sighed, setting her fork down. "So you guys remember Karen right?"

"Duh," I said, encouraging her to continue.

"Well, we started talking again a couple weeks ago," she said. "And we're trying a relationship."

"What?!" Eileen squealed, grabbing her arm. "Why didn't you tell me?! That's so exciting!"

Blair shrugged. "I don't know, you guys are always talking about Hemmings and it's kind of annoying."

Tell me about it. Only I am allowed to piss him off and then be pleased with my work.

"Because no one else has any juicy relationship stories!" Eleanor said. "Oh my god, you have to keep us up to date on everything with her!"

"Okay, okay," she laughed. "Well, we're going out this Saturday. I mean there's nothing much to do as far as dates go in that little town but we're going to spend some time together."

"Ooh, get some," Eileen nudged her and she smiled, still blushing a little bit.

As I was walking back to our dorm, I walked behind the girls a little bit, my brain clouded with thoughts. I wasn't sure what I was thinking about, but it was taking a lot of my focus.

I went to bed without saying much, either, feeling a little distanced from the girls and their nearly endless chatter. My bed was welcoming I was glad to be in it.

Though I dreaded the tutoring session I had the next day, I was somehow looking forward to getting on Professor Hemmings' nerves.


	21. Chapter 21

It had only been about 10 minutes that I had sat down with my homework to get working on it when I saw someone from the corner of my eye. I figured it was just another student in the library doing homework or checking out a book.

However, I was horribly mistaken when the person tapped my shoulder and I looked up from my work.

I rolled my eyes and stood up, prepared to move my books to a table far away before I had to deal with any of this bullshit.

"No, Daisy please listen to me," Alex said, stopping my arms from picking up my books. I folded them across my chest and scowled at him.

"I have nothing to say to you," I said. "I am much happier this way, without worrying about every single little thing I do wrong."

"Listen, Daisy," he said. "I just wanted you to know that I really am sorry for what I did to you. I have no excuse and you did not deserve that."

"You're very right," I said. "I deserve better than that. Now may I continue my homework?"

He sighed. "I just wanted you to know that I really am sorry. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it for weeks, and it's been eating me away inside knowing that I did that to you. I just want a chance to--"

"We are NOT getting back together, Alex," I said, unfolding my hands and moving them in front of me in case he tried anything.

"No, that's not what I was getting at," he said. "I know you wouldn't want to be with me again. I was just wanting to be friends. I don't like the harsh distance between us."

I thought for a minute. Did I really want to just forgive him? I mean, he's not trying to get back together with me, and being friends isn't going to hurt anything.

"Sure," I said.

"Really?" he smiled.

"Yeah, but don't push it," I said. "We aren't getting back together."

"I know, I know," he said. "Well I have homework I should get to so I'll see you around."

I waved awkwardly at him and sat back down, continuing to do my homework and trying to shake my head from the thoughts of Alex.

-

"I just love when he is grading papers and he focuses on the work he's doing," Eleanor was talking about Professor Hemmings again and I was annoyed again.

"Yeah wow, watching him suck the life out of people by grading them harshly just really gets me off, El," I rolled my eyes.

"It's just the way he chews on his bottom lip and ugh." She hugged her books against her chest. "I need to stop. I cannot believe I have a crush on my teacher."

I found myself annoyed with the idea of Eleanor and Hemmings being together and pushed the image out of my head. "What about that one guy you went to the dance with?"

"Brad? He's too flamboyant. I think he might be gay," she whispered the last part.

"So it's just not happening?"

"Nah," she said. "I'd rather not be involved in any relations with other people at the moment anyways. Besides, it is so easy to get caught fucking your teacher and it would never happen anyways, he always picks on you in class and hardly even notices I even exist."

"Yeah he picks on me because he's a dick," I said, though I don't think I'd enjoy the class as much if he didn't pick on me.

"Or because he wants to fuck you on his desk," she whispered, giggling. Unlike all the other times, I got a funny feeling in my stomach thinking about it.

"Come on you hoe," I said and she laughed, wiggling her tongue between her index and middle finger. "I'm hungry and want to be served first."

-

"Okay, now Daisy this time will you please read the passage and answer the questions without some smart aleck remark," Professor Hemmings said, clearly getting frustrated with me about the English tutoring sessions.

"Why do I have to do this?" I said. "I am way too smart for this, it's just a matter of whether or not I want to focus."

"Well first can we prove your ability to focus by showing that you can focus right now?"

"Hmm," I thought for a moment. "Maybe."

I smiled, biting down on my lip when Professor Hemmings' jaw set again, and I was beginning to see what Eleanor and Eileen were talking about when he gets angry, he really was very attractive. When he looked at me I noticed for the first time how blue his eyes were and how much those big glasses took away from the brightness of them. I looked back down at my work, pretending to read again but when I looked back up I saw his beautiful jawline and how perfect it looked now that I'd gotten him slightly agitated.

"I think I'm just gonna call it a day," I said, attempting to close my notebook but Professor Hemmings stopped and opened it back up.

"I am the one who dismisses you, Miss Williams," he said, clearly my attitude was annoying him and that's exactly what I was going for.

This continued for a while until I decided enough was enough and I needed to get my work done. I breezed right through it of course, and before long I was heading back to the dorms with a little bounce in my walk, feeling like I'd accomplished something great.

"Why do you look so smug?" Eleanor asked me, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively when I entered our dorm to put my stuff away before dinner.

"Oh nothing," I lied. "I just irritated Hemmings and made him angry at me because I corrected him on something and am proud of myself for it. The usual."

"Of course," she rolled her eyes teasingly, interlocking our elbows as we walked down to the dining hall.

I found myself watching Hemmings at dinner, admiring his smile when he talked to the other professors. I realized I hadn't seen him smile very much before. He's usually angry at me (oops). His smile was very pleasant and despite the fact that I enjoyed making him angry, I almost found myself wanting to make him smile and laugh more.

As I laid in bed reflecting on everything, it occurred to me that this wasn't happening because I was learning to respect him or anything.

I was catching feelings for my English professor.


	22. Chapter 22

El and I walked to English Friday afternoon and I was looking forward to it. I was ready to start immediately getting on Hemmings' nerves and see what kind of reaction he would have towards me for that day.

I should really be afraid of getting detention all the time, and the effect it was going to have on my chances at getting into uni. The thing was, I didn't care because now that I'd realized that I had feelings for Hemmings, there was no going back and I'd already built myself this reputation with him. If I stopped now, no one would be there to keep him on his toes.

"And Shakespeare then wrote--"

"Hawthorne," I interrupted him, my chin in my left hand as I scribbled on my notebook. Though I had my head tilted down and he couldn't see me, I was smirking at the pause he took and the exasperated sigh I got in return.

"Hawthorne and Shakespeare were two completely different authors," I said. "How could you possibly get them mixed up like that?"

He practically rolled his eyes. "Watch it, Miss Williams, or you'll get detention. As I was saying before I was interrupted, Hawthorne wrote The Scarlet Letter because--"

I stopped listening, already knowing all of these things. I knew all this because I was always reading Hawthorne. Aside from Shakespeare, he was one of my all time favorite authors and I'd read so many of his novels so many times.

"If you want something a little bit more modern, I would suggest maybe reading some Mark Twain," he said, when I finally started listening again.

"Modern?" Someone scoffed. I almost laughed.

"Yes, modern," Hemmings blinked. "His novels are far less difficult to read than Shakespeare and Hawthorne."

"Mark Twain was born in the early 1800s," the student continued. "Professor, do you realize that was almost 200 years ago?"

I rolled my eyes.

"My grandma is older than Mark Twain's novels," I interrupted. "They are a piece of cake to read." 

Hemmings scowled at me, and I looked back down at my notebook, smirking again. I heard El giggle a few seats away from me, probably silently cheering me on to keep roasting everyone.

"Williams, one more comment and I'll give you detention," he sighed, clearly frustrated but knowing that I was right and not wanting to admit to it.

"Yes sir," I said, imagining calling him that while he bent me over his desk.

He was obviously flustered all throughout class. He seemed on edge and quite distracted for how he usually is. I wondered if he was stressed.

Hmm, I know a good solution to that.

Daisy, stop.

"Miss Williams? A word please?" he said after class when he'd finally dismissed everyone and we were packing everything back up. I told Eleanor to go ahead and I'd meet her in a few minutes.

"Yes, Professor?" I approached his desk and looked up into those bright blue eyes I found myself not getting tired of looking into.

"I would greatly appreciate it if you would stop correcting me all the time and let me teach my own class," he said.

I nodded. "Okay."

"I am the professor, I know how to teach these students of mine and although you are highly intelligent, as painful as it is for me to admit and boost your ego--" I smiled sweetly at him. "--it would really make my job easier if you'd back off and let me do the talking and teaching."

"Of course, Professor Hemmings," I said. "May I be excused? I have a best friend waiting on me."

"Yes," he said, watching me as I turned around and walked towards the door. I had a feeling he was watching my ass as I walked and I was glad for it.

-

Eleanor insisted that the girls and I go out for ice cream because she felt that I'd been acting more like myself and they were happy to have the "Old Daisy" back.

The girls were goofy and rowdy as always and I laughed so hard my stomach hurt and I almost couldn't even finish my ice cream. I was enjoying myself and I felt good not to be crying over Alex anymore and finally enjoying myself doing other things with my friends that I needed to be around.

The weekend came and went just like any other, and before I even knew it, it was Tuesday afternoon and I was once again in my tutoring session with Hemmings, getting on his last nerve.

"I think I know that he's being sarcastic in this passage," I said, correcting him once again. "I--of all people--know exactly what it's like when someone is speaking sarcasm."

"Wow, I never would have noticed." His jaw was set and I smirked at him, honestly so turned on by how incredibly sexy he was capable of being without even realizing it.

"It's my first language," I said. "I don't know why I'm so good at English when I clearly excel in sarcasm much more."

"You'd be at the top of the class, just like you are in this one, wouldn't you?" It's about time he gave me back what I've been dishing out to him all year.

"Technically I'm not at the top of this class considering I'm sitting in this hell-hole doing shitty work with you to get my grade up, but I mean there is something else I'd like to be on top of." My smirk deepened as his cheeks flushed.

With one motion, the books sitting in front of me on the table were now on the other side of it as I sat, Hemmings leaning across the table over me without the book barrier between us.

"Why are you smirking?" he asked, his breath fanning over my face as his eyes drilled into mine.

I merely shrugged, appearing not fazed or intimidated by him seeming to tower over me but actually internally screaming.

"I've about had it with you, Daisy," he said, backing up from the table, slightly startling me by the use of my first name considering he always refers to me by some sort of "Williams" fashion. I crossed my arms as he stood and loosened his tie, clearly frustrated with what I'd been doing. Fuck, I have him wrapped around my finger now.

"You walk into my classroom doing all of this." He started pacing back and forth slightly, and I watched in amusement as he appeared to get even more frustrated as the seconds passed. "You walk in here like you own the damn place, practically strutting down the aisles before you sit down in that same spot every single day." He stopped and turned towards me, walking closer to me. I still sat and waited patiently for what was coming because I knew it'd been on it's way for a while.

"You come into my classroom with the audacity to correct me and what I'm teaching," he said, placing his hands on either side of the chair I was sitting in and my heart rate picked up now that I was suddenly cornered by him. Fuck.

"And then to top it all off, you walk around the school and flaunt yourself around like a little tease and know that everyone wants you but very few actually get you," he finished off his speech, taking his hands back but standing in front of me still, crossing his arms.

"You act like there's something wrong with being comfortable in my own skin," I said, looking up at him innocently, standing to my feet.

"I think you're a little more than comfortable," he said, moving towards me and backing me up against the table behind me. Oh Jesus take the wheel.

"I don't know, this table is pretty hard but I think over against your desk might be a little more comfortable," I said, daring to take my chances.

Hemmings placed his hands on either side of me, my head tilted up to face him as he stared down at my with so much intensity I almost couldn't handle it.

"Are you sure you want to play these games? You have no idea what you're getting yourself into," he said in a low voice, almost gravelly.

"I think I do."

"Do you?" He raised an eyebrow at me and I couldn't take it anymore. I reached to his tie and yanked his head down to be level with mine, my lips practically slamming against his. He wasted no time in kissing me back, taking my legs and lifting me onto the table almost effortlessly as he stood between them and dug his fingers into my back, his large hands around my waist.

"Fuck," I breathed out, disconnecting our lips only for a moment as he leaned back in and kissed me forcefully once again. I wrapped my fists around the fabric of the front of his shirt as his fingers effortlessly popped open the top button of my white-button up shirt, then the next, and then the next. The skin of my chest now exposed, he moved his lips down my neck and to my chest, biting down on my skin and sucking harshly, leaving purple-red marks in his wake.

My hands reached up to his head, wrapping my fingers around strands of his hair and tugging on them, his hips responding by grinding them against mine. I practically fell back against the table as he climbed over me, continuing his assault on my chest as his hand slid up my skirt and slipped into my panties. I practically whimpered, his cold fingers against my heat causing an exotic contrast.

"Fuck, did I do all this to you?" Hemmings said in my ear, taunting me as his finger swirled around my arousal that seemed to be collecting more and more by the second. "Are you sure you really know what you're getting yourself into?"

I groaned and lifted my hips against his hand, desperately needing more from him but he pulled away and climbed off of me.

I sat up, dazed and a little frustrated. "What the hell?"

"Your lesson for the day is over. You are dismissed." He placed his finger in his mouth, sucking on it and then turned and walked into his office and slammed the door shut.


	23. Chapter 23

I didn't tell any of the girls about what happened between Hemmings and I on Tuesday after I buttoned up my shirt and quickly left his room and headed to the dorms. The girls were all preoccupied with gossiping and I was grateful for that.

It's not that I wanted to be hiding anything from the girls. I didn't want to lie to them in any way, especially not Eleanor. But I knew that if I told them what happened that they would all think I'd been lying this entire time and who knows what they'd think of me then.

So I played it cool, and I just kept my accomplishments to myself as I was hanging out with the girls. Blair was talking about how her and Karen were planning to see a movie soon and how she was hoping it would end in a makeout session instead of actually watching the movie.

I walked with Eleanor to English and into the room with her, her laughing at something witty I'd said. I locked eyes with Professor Hemmings as I walked in, his cheeks flushing and him quickly looking away. I sat down in my usual spot and Eleanor sat down next to me, pulling out her notebook while she chattered away. I listened half-heartedly as I looked at the table where we usually did our tutoring sessions, which had been organized since we'd made out on it the evening before.

Class had started before I realized it and Hemmings was going on and on about something boring that I already knew, and I sat and scribbled ugly flowers in the margins of my notebook as I took notes literally from my own knowledge like I did everyday.

"If you're looking for a more modern author to read from since someone in here complained that Mark Twain was not modern enough, I would highly recommend John Steinbeck," he said. Of course he's a Steinbeck kind of person, he certainly acts like one.

I sighed, resting my chin in my hand.

"Now he's about to go on about Of Mice and Men and probably mention Grapes of Wrath," I mumbled to Eleanor, who raised an eyebrow at me questioningly.

Hemmings stopped talking and glared at me, then sure enough continued his lecture.

"Steinbeck believed that literature should open your eyes to reality, not necessarily entertain," he said. "You've all probably read Of Mice and Men, as you were required last year. It is certainly an excellent novel..."

"Told you," I whispered.

"And Grapes of Wrath," he said. "Is there anyone who has read Grapes of Wrath?"

I raised my hand, practically rolling my eyes. No one else in the class did.

"As I expected," he sighed. "Very well. I would recommend all of you read it, and Miss Williams, I know you will probably read it again, as you've already read it countless times, I presume?"

"You know me so well."

He scowled at me again, but continued speaking. Normally he would have dropped the detention threat by now.

"Anyway, John Steinbeck is the author we'll be learning about next," he said. "Please open your books to page 468 and read the introduction about him."

I flipped my book open to the page and read through it, and it was all mostly things I'd already known. I tapped my fingers on my desk impatiently as the class continued to drag on.

I gave him so many opportunities to pick on me, yet he didn't. He just kept scowling at me all class and he didn't once threaten detention. I was annoyed at this point, and confused at what exactly was going on in his mind. By this point I'd made so many snide comments that I'd have an entire evening's worth of detention, yet I hadn't even received a warning.

"Class is dismissed," he said as the bell rang, and I hardly even realized what time it was because I was so focused on this weird shift.

"I'll catch up," I said to Eleanor. "There's something I need to ask him about Steinbeck."

"Okay, you nerd," she giggled, giving me a little shove and walking out the door.

"Professor Hemmings?" I said as I approached his desk. He tensed from where he was standing facing the whiteboard that he was erasing.

"Is there something you need, Miss Williams?" He asked. "We don't have tutoring sessions today."

"I know." I waited for the last couple people to file out of the classroom and he finally turned around and looked at me, standing where he was in front of the whiteboard.

"What are you here for, then?" He asked.

"I'm confused," I said.

"About what?" He asked. "You clearly knew all about Steinbeck in class--"

"I think we both know I'm not talking about Steinbeck." I looked at him directly in the eyes and he turned away.

"It was an inappropriate mistake," he said flatly. "It can not and will not happen again."

I stood in my tracks, stunned at the answer I'd received. I opened my mouth to speak, but I was cut off before I even had a chance to make a sound.

"Get out of my classroom."

-

I texted El and let her know that I was heading right to the library to work on my homework by myself. I sat in a corner and got right to work on it, channeling my emotions into just working through it all really quickly.

I sat "reading" for a while, but I was just holding the silly book in front of me and not reading a single word on the page. There's a requirement that you have to have something to do in the library and I wanted quiet time to think, so I sat and pretended to be reading this book.

Really, I was thinking about Hemmings. I was thinking about what had happened the evening before and how he was so cold and distant with me in class and how things seemed to quickly change from the moment he pulled himself off of me and stormed into his office without saying a word the day before.

Who does he think he is? Does he think he has a right to fuck with my feelings like that?

I sat and fumed over it for a while, feeling an odd sense of hurt and betrayal. The fucking prick had his hand in my panties and he thinks I'm going to act like nothing happened?

I know just how I'll get back at him. Soon he'll realize that he's not the one I need to watch out for. I'm the one he needs to watch out for.

He really has no idea what he's getting himself into.


	24. Chapter 24

As I sat in English the following afternoon, I was still pouting about how he reacted but I knew that my plan for revenge was going to surely get back at him. I was just waiting for class to be done and over with.

I kept my mouth shut this time, not mouthing off to Hemmings anymore because I knew he was going to give me detention. I know Eleanor was confused because even she knew there were plenty of openings where I could have made some snide comment but didn't.

When the bell finally rang, I watched as some students filed out the door. I reached down to my socks and pulled them further up my legs, so they were barely covering my knees. When the last student was finally heading out, I pulled my skirt up a little higher on my waist, standing and grabbing my books to head to the table we usually did our tutoring sessions at.

Hemmings walked to the door to close it, and I found my perfect opportunity to start my plan.

"Whoops." I bent over in front of him to pick up my pencil that I'd just "dropped."

When I stood back up, his cheeks were pink but he didn't say anything as he sat down at the table. "I only have 2 passages for you to read today."

"Okay," I sat down with my hand on the collar of my shirt that I was "messing with," and discreetly popped open the top button as I sat down.

I looked at the passage in front of me and started to read it. I finished it in no time and understood it perfectly. I leaned back against my chair, another button of my shirt coming loose that I'd opened while I was reading.

"Finished?" He asked. I nodded.

"Okay, so what is the author's purpose?" He asked.

"He's just trying to inform the reader of the events that happened on Bloody Sunday," I said. "It leads you to believe that it's narrative writing but if it were, it would be written in a narrative form. A in effort of trying to trick me."

He stared at me, as if trying to read my thoughts. He turned to the page to look at the next question, and my hand slipped up and opened one more button on my shirt, showing full cleavage.

"What rhetorical strategy is he using in the first few sentences?" He asked.

"Hmm." I leaned forward to "look" at the passage again. I already knew the answer. I made sure I'd tilted myself down a little. I glanced up at Hemmings, who was looking down my shirt, just like I'd hoped. He appeared nervous, his cheeks pink again. I almost smirked to myself.

"Anaphora and parallelism," I said.

"Okay," he said. He still was trying to focus on the lesson but I knew by the apparent frustration in him that it wouldn't last long.

I stretched as he asked me the next question, then leaned back in to continue my work and discreetly scooted closer to him. My knee touched his under the table as he read the next question off to me.

"I've already found all the instances of metaphors," I said.

"Highlight them," he said.

"Okay, let me just get my highlighter," I said. My bag was sitting on the other side of him, so I leaned across his lap. He leaned back against the chair, clearly startled by my actions. As I reached into my bag with one hand, the other brushed over his lap. As I expected, his pants were rather tight around his crotch. I smirked to myself and knew my job here was done. I pulled the highlighter out and leaned back to my chair, but I ended up further back against it than I'd originally planned. Hemmings pushed me back against my chair and sat with both hands on either side of me.

"What are you playing at?" He said, his nose brushing mine. I won.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Professor," I said softly, my hand reaching up to his pants. He grabbed it and held it down against the chair. He leaned in closer to me, his lips brushing my ear.

"Are you trying to get fucked?" He asked in a low voice. His other hand crept up my skirt.

"Maybe?" I answered. My legs subconsciously spread apart as his cool finger hooked around the top of my panties.

"This is what you want, isn't it?" He said. "You've been asking for this haven't you?"

"Yes," I whispered. His fingers dipped down into my panties and touched my core, collecting my arousal already on his fingers. He moved his fingers up further to rub against my sensitive bundle of nerves, my heart pounding against my chest. He rubbed circles against me, watching me as I leaned back against the chair and let him, finally getting exactly what I wanted.

My hips lifted off of the chair against his hand, desperate for more.

"Eager?" He asked. He pulled his hand out of my panties and I was about to whine and complain but before I could, they were completely off of my legs and on the floor in front of me.

His hands wrapped around my legs, pulling me to the edge of my seat. It crossed my mind that the door probably wasn't locked but I didn't even care.

He pushed my skirt up my legs, exposing my skin. Before I could react, he was on his knees in front of me and his head dipped between my legs. I gasped as I felt his warm tongue against me with no warning, swirling around that one sensitive spot. My fingers tangled in his hair, feeling his head move with his tongue as he bore no mercy on me and the intense pleasure that seemed to wash over my body more and more every second.

"Fuck," I managed to breathe out, tugging on his hair. He moaned against me, the vibrations from his low, resonant voice sending yet another wave of pleasure through me. Not once did he remove his mouth from me, continually sucking and licking at the spot that I needed him most. A feeling in the pit of my stomach began building up, causing me to tug harder on his hair, which led to him moaning against me again and more feelings of ecstasy taking over my body.

Just when I thought I couldn't handle anymore, he reached up with one hand and dipped 2 fingers inside me with ease, becoming too much for me to handle anymore. My legs shook as he brought me to my high and sent me through my release, my fingers in his hair tugging relentlessly and a moan escaping my lips. He gradually pulled out his fingers and pulled away from me, letting me come down from it and stood up in front of me. I reached down and grabbed my panties to pull back on as I pulled my skirt back down to cover myself again.

"Your lesson for the day is over," he said quietly. "It seems that you are getting better at mastering the material I put in front of you."

He walked back into his office again while I gathered my books and hurried out the door, stopping by the restroom to make sure I didn't look like I'd just been eaten out by my English professor before I hurried back to my dorm with the girls.


	25. Chapter 25

I stayed quiet in English.

Out of the ordinary for me, I know. But I knew by the way Hemmings looked at me when I walked in that I was walking on thin ice with him. I sat down in my usual spot, immediately pouting.

Eleanor had no idea, and she didn't seem to be catching onto my mood, but I was grateful for that. I didn't want to explain it to her and have her think some negative thought about me fucking around with my professor when it had already been rumored before and now it was true.

Hemmings didn't pick on me at all during class. I didn't give him an opportunity to give me detention because I kept my mouth shut and took notes. The flow of my usual sarcastic and snide remarks had seemingly stopped completely; my mind was too wrapped around the worry of what bomb Hemmings was going to drop on me this time.

Whatever his response was going to be, I knew it wouldn't be a corny fairytale ending. It never is. 

"Miss Williams, a word?" Hemmings asking me to stay after class surprised me but didn't at the same time.

"I'll catch up," I said to El, who nodded and left as I approached his desk.

"Go wait in my office please." He didn't even look at me.

I walked into his office, shutting the door behind me and sitting down at the chair in front of his desk. By now, I knew what was coming.

A few minutes later, he walked in and didn't even sit down. He paced the room a couple times, then stopped and leaned against the desk in front of me, crossing his arms and looking down at his feet. I smacked myself in my face mentally for noticing how good he looked today just like every other day, but knowing that this time I wouldn't be getting my way.

After a few minutes of silence, I couldn't take it anymore.

"I know what you're going to say," I said quietly.

Hemmings looked up at me from his feet finally, questioning me.

"You're going to tell me it was a mistake and that it won't ever happen again," I said. "That you can't have that type of relationship with a student and that what I did was wrong and that I deserve to be punished for it, and not in a sexual way."

He sighed, and when he didn't say anything back was when I shed my first tear for this prick that I'd somehow managed to get strong feelings for over the school year that I swore I wouldn't.

"And you know what the worst part is?" I continued. "I know you have feelings towards me too. Maybe not as strong as mine towards you, but I know they're there. And believe me, what I did was wrong, but you shouldn't have let it happen. You should have just send me to Headmistress Morris's office and ended it there instead of playing with my feelings."

He still said nothing to me, so I stood and grabbed my bag, walking out of his office without saying another word. I used the sleeve of my cardigan to wipe my tears from my cheeks, and stopped by the bathroom before I went to the girls again.

I stared at myself in the mirror. I wiped my eyes one more time, swore I'd hold myself together and put on a fake smile for the girls.

-

I found myself in the library on Saturday studying instead of hanging out with the girls. I felt bad about turning them down but the last thing I wanted to do was go out with them and pretend to not be sulking in my mistakes and misfortunes.

How could I have been so stupid? Of course he couldn't have something like that with a student. I'm a silly little eighteen year old with raging hormones that just wants to hop on everything that walks, or so they say. Sure, I enjoyed what happened between Hemmings and I but fuck if it didn't hurt now.

I flipped through my philosophy notes absentmindedly, finding a page that I'd taken a few weeks before. I stopped and stared at it for a minute. I put all my notes away and grabbed my bag, heading to Professor Irwin's classroom.

I knocked on the door even though it was a Saturday and he probably wasn't even in there. It never hurts to try.

To my surprise, I heard his familiar voice call out, "come in."

I opened the door and he was sitting in his office with the door open at his desk, grading papers. I walked in and sat at the chair on the other side of his desk, and he smiled at me over his brown framed glasses. "Hello Daisy."

"Hello Professor Irwin," I said. "Am I interrupting you?"

"No, no, it's okay," he said. He set his pen down and stood from his desk to the teapot on the other side of his office. "Tea?"

"Yes please," I said. He poured us both a small cup and sat down again, taking a sip and sighing.

"Is there something you need?" He asked me.

"Actually yes, but not in a way that you might be expecting," I said.

"I was going to ask, because you have well over 100% in my class," he said. "Top student in all of your year, actually."

"Yeah," I sighed. "I haven't been feeling so significant though."

"Listen, I know your English grade isn't the best, but Daisy you are so intelligent, you shouldn't be letting that--"

"No, no, professor, it's not about that," I said, shaking my head and cutting him off. "It's been improving a lot. The tutoring sessions with Hemmings have definitely been helping." My stomach turned over.

"Well I'm glad to hear that," he said. "But, might I ask, what has gotten you so bent out of shape lately then?"

Where do I even start? How do I word this so he doesn't catch on that I'm talking about Hemmings?

"Have you ever found yourself in the position where you are just so attracted to someone, and you know they're attracted to you too, but for some reason the universe said 'no' and you can't be with them?" I said. "Or you just can't find the midpoint, where you just feel like being annoyed with each other is your favorite part of your relationship or whatever is going on between you even if that's not healthy?"

"Daisy," he looked at me and I stopped and stared back and him expectantly.

"I'm not going to be one of those adults that tell you that love doesn't happen at a young age because it certainly does," he said. "And I think you already know to focus on your grades and school more than your romantic relationships so I'm not going to lecture you on that either."

"I just don't know what to do," I set down my tea after taking a swig of it and burning my throat. "I feel so pathetic for having to move on from someone I was never even with."

"That's not pathetic," he said. "I'll tell you what I think. I think that the universe didn't necessarily tell you 'no.' Perhaps the universe only told you 'not right now,' and you're just taking that as a no. Maybe this person that you feel this connection with just isn't meant to be yours right now and you're just jumping the gun a little bit."

I was almost afraid for a moment that he knew who it was, but I couldn't be that obvious. And he would turn me in if he knew.

"I think maybe you should spend some time with your friends, Daisy," he said. "Eleanor love spending time with you."

"What makes you say that?" I asked, though I smiled a little because I knew it was true.

"Well, she is certainly a lot less crazy in my class than she is when she's around you," he said, chuckling to himself a little, probably at all the batty things she does around me. "She's very quiet and reserved in class, but she turns into a wild animal with you. A very intelligent one, she is."

"Yeah she is." I smiled and took another sip of my tea. Eleanor is such a nut but she is so smart and sweet and cute. I love her to death.

"And whenever you figure out whatever is going on with this frustrating other half of yours, I wish you the best with whatever does happen," he said. "And just remember that everything is for a reason."

"Thank you, professor," I said, standing up. "I think I'm going to take your advice and spend some time with my bonkers best friend."

"Don't forget to enjoy yourself," he took my now empty cup of tea with his own to clean. "Have a wonderful rest of your weekend, Daisy. I'll see you in class on Monday."

I left his office feeling as though I should have felt more at peace with the whole situation knowing that maybe someday it would happen. But for some reason I didn't.


	26. Chapter 26

The weekend ending was bittersweet for me. It was too short because I had to go back to face Hemmings again, which I wasn't ready to do. But it was too long because all weekend I spent crying while the girls weren't looking and faking smiles and pretending to have fun when they were. I think Eleanor saw right through me but fortunately she didn't push the issue.

I didn't say a word or even look at Hemmings at all when I entered his classroom. I walked to my usual spot in the room and sat down, pulling out my notes and reading over them even though it was clearly never necessary for me. I waited for the tardy bell to ring before I even looked up from them at all, and when I did it was only to check what he had planned for today, which was written on the board. I looked up from my notes only once all period, and when I did I locked eyes with Hemmings. I looked away as quickly as I could so I couldn't see a single emotion in his and he couldn't see any in mine. I wanted this to end as quickly and painlessly as I possibly could considering it already hurt to sit and listen to his voice, knowing what it sounded like, soft and low in my ear things that no one else heard him say.

Or was I even the only one? What if he did this with other students? No, it couldn't be. He wouldn't keep pushing me away like that if he were with others. I knew I made myself irresistible to him and if he weren't hesitant about it due to the circumstances then maybe we would've had a chance. But I tried mine, and they definitely weren't what I was hoping for.

When class was dismissed, I left quickly and said nothing, didn't look at Hemmings or even wait for him to call me back in. I wouldn't ever expect him to but even if he did I wouldn't turn back. It was easier this way and it would hurt me less in the long run.

"Daisy," I heard Eleanor call my name from behind me as I made a bee-line out of the classroom. I stopped outside the door and waited for her, and she caught up to me quickly and walked next to me.

"Hey," she gave me a small smile and put her arm around my shoulder. "Is everything okay?"

"Yes," I smiled back at her.

"Are you sure? You've just been so quiet lately," she said, frowning. "Daisy, you know you can tell me anything."

"I'm okay, I promise," I said. "I'm just tired and stressed out. It's that time of year you know."

Eleanor didn't look convinced at all. "Daisy, I'm a little worried about you."

"Don't worry about me, I'm fine." I wasn't sure I was ready to tell Eleanor just yet so I decided that lying was easier.

"Well okay," she said. I was grateful that she wasn't going to push the issue. "I'm going to the library to work on my homework, are you going to join me?"

"Of course," I smiled for my best friend even though it hurt. I didn't want to weigh her down with my misfortunes and I certainly was not ready to admit to the sins I'd committed.

Maybe I just need to go to church more often, Jesus Christ. I wouldn't be in this mess if I were a good Christian.

-

This process repeated itself for a couple weeks. I kept my mouth shut in English and avoided any kind of conversation, eye contact or anything in class. During our tutoring sessions, I kept my mouth shut and did my work. I breezed through it all, now that I was able to focus and do it. It sucked sitting next to him while I worked, being able to smell his sweet scent and force myself to not look at him and admire his eyes or the muscles in his arms that showed through the thin button-up shirts he wore everyday with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Whenever I had to look at him, I just looked at his glasses because there was nothing captivating about them. In fact they took away from the brightness of his eyes.

I was doing well at avoiding him. I still wanted to mouth off to him in class whenever he got something wrong. He started figuring out when he made his own mistakes and began correcting himself considering I wasn't beating him to it anymore. I felt sluggish everyday, and I felt like the life was being drained out of me more and more every time I went into English now. I hated it; English was my strongest subject and because of this asshole that I'd grown infatuated with it was my most dreaded class of the day.

"Miss Williams." I stopped dead in my tracks one day after class when Hemmings called me that name that he always did when we were around the other students, my stomach turning over.

I approached his desk cautiously, stopping and readjusting my bag on my shoulder. "Professor, it's Wednesday. We don't have a tutoring session today."

"I know," he said. He put the eraser for the board down as the last couple students filed out of his classroom. "I have a question for you."

"You know that I already understand everything in the class. The only reason I still have those tutoring sessions with you is because my grade is still at a B- and my parents won't let me stop until it's back up to an A." I couldn't think of any other reason he'd be holding me after class to discuss something with me. This certainly made avoiding him a bit harder.

"I know you do," he said. "I just can't help but notice a change in your attitude."

Shouldn't he have noticed that before? Why wouldn't my attitude change?

"Why have you stopped correcting me and making snide remarks?" He asked.

"It's inappropriate." I used his own words and turned around and walked out of his classroom without looking at him.

-

Blair for some reason seemed insistent to get coffee that weekend with me and I knew it was because Eleanor and Eileen sent her to talk to me. I still wasn't going to open up.

The conversation was light and fun and I laughed with her and was actually enjoying myself at first, and then she asked a question that confirmed my suspicions about El and Eileen.

"Daisy, we all have noticed a bit of a change in you again," Blair said. "I don't want to be up in your face about it, but I promise you can tell me anything and I won't judge you or anything."

I shook my head. "It's really nothing. I just made some mistakes that I'm trying to move on from is all."

"We're here for you and we want to help you," Blair frowned. I felt bad because she was so small and innocent and I knew she only wanted to help me. But there was no way I could tell even Blair what happened.

"I don't want to bother you guys with my personal problems," I said. "Really, it's nothing and I'd rather not talk about it or get into it. I'm sorry Blair."

"Okay." She sighed.

"Tell me about you and Karen," I said.


	27. Chapter 27

By the end of January, everyone was talking about an upcoming Valentine's Day dance they were going to have, including all of the girls. I was annoyed enough as it was with all the talk considering my love life was in shambles and I was still ignoring and avoiding Hemmings on the daily. The girls still had no clue about anything that had happened between us and I intended on keeping it that way.

At dinner I was zoning out while the girls continued to talk excessively about the stupid dance. I was thinking about how angry I was with myself for still thinking about Hemmings and his stupid blue eyes when Eleanor grabbed my attention by saying my name and waving a hand in front of my face.

"What?" I asked.

"You should come dress shopping with me tomorrow," she said. "We haven't had much time just for the two of us in a while and it would be fun."

"I'm not going," I said. "There's no point in getting a dress I'll never wear."

"Please?" She said. "It'll be fun and it will be fun. Its our last year here and we should spend it doing things we'll remember forever."

I sighed. I really did not want to go and create a memory of myself sitting around being bummed out because a teacher wouldn't date me, but I felt bad for Eleanor.

"Fine," I gave in and she smiled at me.

"We are leaving at noon tomorrow to go shopping."

-

I kept my pity party about going until Eleanor finally was being too goofy and I laughed at her a bit, and I was able to loosen up and enjoy myself. I was still pretty salty about the whole dance situation so I didn't put much effort into the dress I picked for myself. It was quite a simple dress actually, just a short grey dress that I'd actually wear on any normal day but I wasn't trying to impress anyone. Eleanor looked at me questioningly when I pulled it off the rack, knowing my style but didn't say anything.

"So tell me how things have been," she said. "I know that you're going to keep telling us all that nothing is wrong but you can't keep from me forever, and now is the perfect time away from all of the girls to tell me."

I sighed.

"Look, if you're still upset about Alex, you are so much better than that," Eleanor stopped and took my hands in hers and I laughed before she even had a chance to finish.

She looked at me confused, probably wondering why I was laughing while she was trying to be serious.

"It's not about Alex," I said. "I'm over it, done with him, and into a new chapter of my life." Not a pleasant one but a new one.

"Well then what is it?" She asked. "You can tell me anything, Daisy, nothing has ever stopped you before."

I sighed again, knowing she was going to drag it out of me eventually.

"Okay fine but this stays between you and I, no one else. Not even the other girls," I said.

Eleanor nodded. "You have my word."

"And you have to trust me when I tell you that this only happened recently and not at all while I was with Alex," I said. "I would never do that to someone."

"Oh my god." Eleanor looked at me in disbelief.

She knew. I covered my face in embarrassment.

"No, you need to tell me. I need to hear you say it," she said.

"Well, during one of our tutoring sessions we kinda made out for a while," I said. Eleanor leaned in to make sure she got all the details, smiling excitedly at me. "But then he got all cold and distant with me and told me it was an inappropriate mistake, and you know me. I didn't take that well so I decided to get back at him and long story short I teased him until he couldn't resist me anymore and then some things happened--"

"What things?!" She grabbed my arms and pulled me to an aisle away from the elderly couple that was walking nearby us.

"Well..." I lowered my voice. "He kinda... Went down--"

"Oh my god!" She practically squealed. "How was it?!"

I shushed her. "It actually really hurt." I was referring to my emotions but I forgot that Eleanor and I weren't on the same page and she looked at me weird.

"I mean--let me explain." I sighed and prepared to relive what he said to me. "He told me the next day that he couldn't have that kind of relationship with a student and that it was another inappropriate mistake. Well I mean, he didn't say it. I said it for him but I know that's what he was thinking because he didn't deny it or correct me."

"Daisy, oh my god I'm so sorry," she said. "I can't even imagine how hard it must be to sit and hear Eileen and I babble about him constantly."

"Yeah."

"Daisy you deserve the best."

"It's my own fault," I masked my emotions and tried to brush it off even though my chest was tight. "I should have known that wasn't going to happen and I should have put a stop to it before I developed all these feelings towards him. And I certainly shouldn't have made so many advances on him." I walked to another aisle and Eleanor followed me.

"You never know, Daisy," she said. "He clearly has feelings for you. The way he looks at you in class everyday and the way he picks--well used to pick on you--it's just so obvious. Maybe someday you guys will be together. Or if you don't end up together then I know you'll find someone who will be perfect for you and make you forget about any heartbreak you've ever experienced."

I stopped pushing the clothes around the racks that I was doing to cover up my anxiety. "And that's also the reason I don't mouth off to him in class anymore. He kept telling me it's inappropriate so I stopped."

"Daisy." Eleanor turned me to face her. "Everyone was so entertained by that. You have to at least make him look dumb again. For me?"

I laughed and shook my head, my best friend pulled me into her arms for a hug.

"It's going to be okay," she said, rubbing my back. "We are going to have fun at this dance and we are not going to think about any stupid boy--or man--that has broken our hearts."

"Okay." I tried to stay enthusiastic for Eleanor's sake.

"Now come on, I need you to help me pick a dress and you are not getting that one." She took the grey one out of my hands and put it on a random rack, dragging me through the store. I laughed at my goofy best friend, grateful that at least someone wanted me to be happy.


	28. Chapter 28

By the time the Valentine's Day dance had finally come around, I had lost my initial excitement that Eleanor's pep talking had given me. It made me excited at the time and finding this gorgeous red dress that looked phenomenal on her was fun, but now that I was sitting at the dance with my chin in my hand slumped against a table I was no longer having fun.

I saw Alex hanging out with his friends, and I was surprised he hadn't moved onto some other hoe by now. I avoided eye contact with him so he wouldn't come and ask me to dance. I also avoided looking at Hemmings at all, who didn't appear to be anywhere in sight anyways. All the couples slow dancing in front of me made me want to gag. I was so tired of romance and the drama that comes with catching feelings for someone. I just wanted to go back to my room and sleep.

"Daisy come on," Eleanor pulled on my arm but I didn't budge. "You can't just sit here and mope all night."

"You're right," I said, getting up and a hopeful smile spread across her face. "I'm going to go sit in our room and mope all night instead. At least in there I can be comfortable and cry while I watch a sappy chick flick."

Eleanor's smile melted and she rolled her eyes. "Daisy come on. This is our last year, don't you want to make the most of it?"

"I'm sorry Eleanor." I sighed. "I just don't have it in me right now."

She frowned and I knew she understood. "Let me walk you back?"

"No, I'm fine." I said. "Go ahead and have fun, don't worry about me. I'm just gonna go back and sleep."

Eleanor gave me a hug and I began trudging back to my room slowly, accenting on how sluggish and done I felt.

As I turned the corner to go down the hallway that led past Hemmings' room and into the dorms, I stopped at a tall blonde figure in front of me.

I stared up at Hemmings himself, but then decided I didn't need this tonight. I stepped to the side to continue walking but his hand caught my arm.

"What?" I snapped, turning back around and facing him.

"Can we talk?" He asked, and I almost wanted to refuse him and tell him that the last time he asked to "talk" he didn't even say shit and that I didn't want to waste my time, but the part of me that was still infatuated with him and those haunting blue eyes let me follow him into his room and into his office.

I sat down in front of his desk, unsure what to say. I looked down at the neatness, how there was nothing but a few pens and a calendar sitting on it, and a stack of papers that I'm assuming he'd finished grading while he was in here. An uncomfortable silence settled over us as he sat down at this desk, folding his hands in front of his face and closing his eyes.

Just as I was about to ask if he was actually going to start talking, he said, "I am so sorry Daisy."

As another silence settled over us I realized he was either going to waste all my time taking forever to get it out or that's all he had to say. My impatience got the best of me and I let out an exasperated sigh.

"That's it?" I gaped. "That's fucking it? You takes weeks to finally say anything at all, and when you finally grow a pair and do, all you say is 'I am so sorry'."

He looked up at me, still not saying anything but looking as though he wanted to.

"I cannot believe I came in here and wasted my time for this," I scoffed, getting up to leave and go back to my room like I'd originally planned.

"No Daisy, I'm not done." He stood and moved in front of the door and looked down at me.

"Well then spit it out," I said, crossing my arms.

"I just cannot stop thinking about you," he said, tangling his fingers in his hair and pulling his glasses off. "It kills me to look at you everyday and know that I hurt you the way I did. I know it was all my fault and I know that I have no one to blame but myself for the way that you walk around keeping quiet now and your friends are worrying about you. I knew you were special from the first day you walked into my class and snapped at me, and the way every day after that, you knew everything about everything I was going to talk about. And fuck do I miss your attitude, and the way you correct me when I'm wrong and tell me that I don't know what I'm talking about. I care for you Daisy, and in a way that's way more than a teacher ever should for a student, especially one that's always mouthing off and getting detention."

I couldn't tell if I was shaking because I was angry or because I was shocked that he'd actually said it all to me. "I won't believe it until you prove it."

It was a lie because I knew it was true, but I wanted to know just how much he really meant what he said and I knew it was true when he stepped forward and took my face in his hands and pressed his lips against mine. As angry as I was that he took so long to finally admit these things to me, I couldn't stop myself from kissing him back; I wanted and needed this for too long and I couldn't wait any longer for it.

He backed me into his desk and the back of my thighs hit the top, and he lifted me slightly to put me on top of it while he kissed me. My legs wrapped around his waist and he pushed the stack of graded papers and his pens and calendar onto the floor next to it, laying me back against his desk. Our lips never disconnected as his hands moved to the back zipper of my dress, tossing it onto the floor with the papers.

"Are we really doing this or are you about to shove yourself off of me?" I asked and he shook his head.

"I'm not making that mistake again." His lips attached to my neck and I loosened his tie, pulling it off of him completely and unbuttoning his shirt. I pushed it off his shoulders and he wiggled out of it as my hands went for his pants, a prominent bulge around his crotch. I reconnected my lips with his, desperate for his touch and ran my fingers through his hair, tugging on it while he his lips worked against mine. His pants fell down his knees and he kicked them off, his shoes going with them as he climbed over me in his underwear and socks.

I bit down on his neck as his hips pushed against mine and I whimpered at the sudden contact. "Professor Hemmings, please."

"Just call me Luke," he whispered in my ear as he reached behind my back and unhooked my bra, letting it fall from my shoulders as one of his hands moved up to massage one of my now exposed breasts. My head fell back against the wood of his desk and he hooked his fingers around the waistband of my panties.

"I missed touching you," he said softly, running his hands over my stomach and thighs, the roughness of his hands a stark contrast against my delicate skin. His teeth bit down on my chest and sucked harshly, moans falling from my lips. He moved his hand to gently cover my mouth and stop me from making too much noise as he used his other hand to finally pull my panties off of my legs.

I reached up and pulled his own down, pulling him over me in a desperate attempt to get him to do something sooner. He used his hand to brush over my face, pushing my mess of hair out of it as he leaned down and kissed me again, my fingers digging into his sides as I tried again to pull him closer to me. I'd had enough teasing already.

I lifted my hips but he stopped me, pulling away and I groaned, my first instinct being that he was going to step away from me and tell me that I needed to go back to my room and forget that any of this was even happening. I almost threw a fit and started crying until I realized he was rummaging through his things and then finally stood up and held up a shiny foil packet.

"Not that I was expecting anything to happen... My mom always taught me to carry one with me all the time just in case," he blushed.

"Just get on with it," I huffed impatiently, not interested in his childhood stories at that moment. He wasted no more time in putting the condom on, and then finally laid me back on the desk and kissed me again, then slowly eased himself into me.


	29. Chapter 29

I opened my eyes and looked around to observe I was in my bed, still in my dress from the dance. I sat up quietly and wiped the sleep from my eyes, looking at my fingers to see smeared mascara and eyeliner that I knew I was going to regret not washing off the night before.

I quietly made my way to my dresser to get leggings and a sweater for the day, then went into the bathroom to take a shower, careful not to wake the sleeping girls.

Memories from the night before flooded my mind. It had actually happened. I looked in the mirror as I removed my dress at the lovebites that Hemmin--Luke had left on my chest, the scratches on my back and the smeared makeup from the sweat that had formed on my face during it. I reluctantly took a shower, washing away all of last nights images while I prepared myself for the questions I knew the girls were going to hound me with when I got out.

When I did step out of the bathroom, Eleanor was awake and Eileen and Blair were stretching in their beds, appearing to have just waken but they all jumped on me, as I was expecting, when they noticed I was up.

"Excuse me!" Eleanor said, grabbing my arm and dragging me to her bed. "You have a lot of explaining to do to your best friend! You told me you were going to bed but when I got here 2 hours later you weren't here! You didn't even come back at all last night did you?!"

"No, I did!" I said. "I promise! I just got in really late."

"Well that doesn't explain where you were that you got back so late from," Eileen nudged me, while they all 3 stared at me expectantly.

"Okay." Here goes. "Some unexpected things occurred last night."

"Where were you?!" Eleanor practically screeched.

"Okay just let me explain everything," I said, trying to get them out of my face. "As I was walking back to our room, thoroughly bummed out from the dance and just wanting to sleep, I ran into Hemmings in the hallway--"

Eileen gasped. "Oh my god, Daisy!" She laughed a little, swatting my arm. She had no idea.

"There's more," I held my finger up and she covered her mouth, waiting patiently. "So I was going to just walk by, but then he took my arm and asked if we could talk, and I was going to bitch him out for the last time he wanted to 'talk' but I followed him into his office instead--" Eileen's jaw was still dropped open. "--and basically he just said he was sorry and when I got angry, long story short he confessed his love to me, we started making out and then we fucked on his desk."

"And then what?!" Blair tapped on my arm expectantly.

"Well, then we sat and talked for a while. We talked for a long time, I don't know, I was half awake when he walked me back here. I just know it was really late and no one was even around in the hallways anymore. And then I passed out, got up and showered and here I am."

"Oh my god, Daisy you guys fixed things!" Eleanor said excitedly. "I knew you would!"

"Fixed what?" Eileen asked. "Daisy am I missing something?"

Eleanor's eyes widened. "Oh shit. Daisy I'm so sorry!"

"It's okay, they were going to find out anyways," I said.

"Find out what?!" Blair pressed, and I sighed.

"This wasn't the first time," I admitted. "I mean, it was the first time we flat out had sex, but we made out before, and then we made out again and that time he also went down on me."

"Why didn't you tell us?!" Eileen gaped.

"I don't know, I was kind of ashamed of it and he rejected me and student-zoned me anyways," I said.

"But now you guys are fine!" Eleanor said excitedly.

"I don't actually know," I said. "We'll see I guess."

"Well I have faith that it will work out," Eleanor said. "Now I want to see any marks he left on you because I know he did."

-

Monday had rolled around before I even knew it, and I hadn't actually seen Hemmings since Saturday night/Sunday morning. I walked into his class and sat in my usual spot, the first time in a while that I didn't walk in and pout first thing.

He had of course gone off on some rant during some lecture he was giving of some novel I'd read that nobody else had and was comparing it to another. Something that I absolutely hated when he did because every novel is different and special in its own way and comparing them to each other just drives me up a wall.

"It's a bit of a difficult read," he said. "But it's definitely worth all the time and effort put into figuring it out."

"Sounds familiar," I coughed.

"That'll be one seat in detention for you, Miss Williams." I looked up at Hemmings facing the board and writing something on it, and even though he was facing the other way I could see the hint of a smirk on his face from the side view. "For your constant inappropriate interruptions during class."

"My bad." I tilted my head down to use my hair to cover my own smirk.

Eleanor looked at me concerned when she left the room but I waved her off and insisted it was fine. I would explain to her later that being on good terms or not, we were always going to be at each other's throats. It's just how we worked.

"It's nice to see that your attitude is back," Hemmings--who was now Luke to me--said as the last student left the classroom and I waited patient at my desk.

I stood from my seat and walked towards his desk, knowing by his playful tone what was going to happen next. "You know I just like to keep you on your toes, Professor."

He walked quietly to the door, letting it shut and lock before he turned around and pulled his glasses off of his head, rolling his sleeves further up his arms. Holy shit I was lucky. "My name is actually Luke to you now."

"Is that your way of trying to get me to say your name? Because I could think of a few other, more effective methods." I backed away from him even though he kept closing in on me, pushing me against his desk.

"You're being very misbehaved, Daisy." His fingers reached forward and trailed against my arm ever so slightly. "I think I need to punish you."

"You know I'd be honored to take any punishment from you, Luke."

He reached down and took my face in one hand to kiss me, the other pulling my skirt up further on my waist, pushing me up on top of his desk now, standing between my legs to kiss me. I went to wrap my legs around him and tangle my fingers in his hair but he swatted my hands and legs away, flipping me around and bending me over the top of his desk.

"What was it that you said to me the first week you were here?" He asked, reaching into one of his drawers while he held my hands behind my back.

"What?" I asked, slightly distracted by his words. I heard the drawer shut and he leaned down close to my ear.

"Oh yeah, I remember. Was it--" something cold and hard came down on my behind, making me jump and moan a little. "--spanking you with a ruler over my desk?"

"Fuck," I moaned, his hot breath against my ear adding to the sensation.

"I don't even know how many times I have to make up for, all the times you've had detention." Another swat came down on my ass and I let out another moan.

"Don't be too loud," he whispered. "You wouldn't want the other students to know about how I treat you behind closed doors. It wouldn't be fair if they knew you were my favorite."

After one more swat against my bottom, I heard his belt buckle coming undone. I laid against his desk in anticipation, waiting for what was coming next.

His cold fingers yanked my panties down my legs quickly, pulling them down and off my feet entirely before he pulled me closer off of the desk.

"Remember not to be too loud."


	30. Chapter 30

I began to realize this relationship that Professor Hemmings and I had after a couple weeks. If I felt like getting some action, I would just mouth off to Hemmings a few times and he would give me detention and then instead of actually making me sit and do my punishment we would fuck around in some sort of way.

Of course, I didn't tell any of the girls about that. The last thing I needed was them knowing about every time I was about to get some dick. So I just kept it on the down low and enjoyed it as it happened and figured I'd tell them eventually but that wasn't the right time and place for it. 

As I was sitting in English, I was tapping my pen on my notebook as Hemmings was droning on about something annoying again. The phone rang and it caught my attention, my head perking up to see what it was about.

Hemmings approached the phone and picked it up, holding the receiver up to his ear.

"Hello... Yes, she'll be right down." He hung up after the short phone call ended and looked at me. "Headmistress Morris would like to see you, Miss Williams."

I stood nervously, wondering what she could possibly be wanting me for. Unlike the last time, no one went by making "ooh" noises as I exited the classroom and headed towards her office.

I knocked on the ajar door, and when she glanced up over her glasses and told me to come in, I entered and sat down cautiously.

"Do you know why I called you into my office, Daisy?" she asked.

"No ma'am," I said. Oh god, I hope she doesn't know about Hemmings and I. I will be ruined.

"I just got off the phone with your parents," she explained. "They said they are satisfied now that your grade in English, and they said it's alright for you to drop your tutoring sessions now."

I let out a breath of relief. "Really?!"

She nodded. "Your hard work has really paid off, Daisy."

"Wow, thank you Headmistress," I said, smiling and relieved that I no longer had to waste time after classes doing tutoring sessions.

"You've earned it," she said. "That's all, you can go back to class."

"There's actually something I wanted to ask you about," I said.

"Go on," she nodded.

"I think I want to take the advanced English class for my last quarter," I said. "The material in this class is way too easy for me and I want something that isn't just busy work."

She nodded. "I think I can arrange that."

"Great, thank you!" I smiled and stood from the chair and headed towards the door.

"Have a wonderful day, Miss Williams."

"You too!"

-

I made my way to the dining hall with the girls that night for dinner, talking and laughing. I was beyond happy that I no longer had to go to tutoring sessions and the girls were also excited when I shared that news with them as well.

"Hey Daisy," I stopped when I felt a large hand on my shoulder and turned around to face who it was.

"Hi Alex," I said, gesturing to the girls that I'll catch up.

"I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out and get lunch tomorrow?" he asked.

I hesitated, adjusting my weight between my two feet a couple times and looking towards the dining hall and then back to him. "Like, do you mean that as in you're asking me on a date?"

"No, we're just friends," he smiled.

"Okay," I said hesitantly still. "I'll meet you in the commons at noon?"

He nodded. "That sounds good."

"Okay."

"Okay." We awkwardly stared at each other for a few seconds before I walked away to sit with the girls again at dinner.

-

Meeting up for lunch with Alex wasn't nearly as awkward as I thought it would be. It was much worse.

It seemed like we small talked the entire thing.

"How have you been?" he asked when we first sat down.

"I've been good, how about you?"

"I've been good too."

The extent of pretty much the entire conversation we had was that he got a scholarship for football and he was excited for it, and that I hadn't heard back from my uni applications yet.

I got back to the dorms and Eleanor and I were in the bathroom curling our hair since we had nothing better to do.

"How was lunch with Alex?" she asked.

"Boring." I rolled my eyes.

"Was it that bad?" she twirled one of her long black strands around the curling iron.

"It was all small talk. He asked me how I've been. He asked if I've been seeing anyone else."

"What did you tell him?" she asked.

"I told him good and no," I said. "He would have questioned if I'd said anything about seeing someone else and then I'd be royally fucked."

"Yeah you would," she winked and I rolled my eyes and swatted her arm. "But really though, how are things with you and Hemmings?"

"They haven't really gone anywhere," I lied. "We're both busy."

"I'm sure it will work itself out soon enough," she said.

"Hopefully," I sighed.


	31. Chapter 31

Spring was creeping up on us quickly, and by April, Hemmings and I were still frequently getting it on after class in "detention." Of course, the girls were all still completely clueless to this and I intended on keeping it that way. Everything was great aside from the fact that Alex seemed to be trying to make things happen between us again. Or so I thought they were.

Something occurred to me while I was sitting in English, watching Hemmings reading something aloud to the class. My stomach turned at the thought, and I knew I had to bring this up and end it as quickly as possible if my fears were right.

"Professor Hemmings, may I speak to you?" I asked after class ended, approaching his desk. Another student was standing and waiting with a question.

"Yes. Go wait in my office, Miss Williams," he said. I carried my bag in and sat down, waiting slightly impatiently.

Within a couple minutes, he entered his office and started making tea. I'm not going to drink it, you might as well stop now.

"Are you married?" I asked. Hemmings almost dropped the cup he was trying to pour, catching it and setting it down, looking at me startled.

"What?"

"Are you?" I raised my eyebrows.

"No, I'm not. Where--"

"Do you have a girlfriend back home?" I asked, interrupting him.

"Daisy, no. Where is this coming from?" He asked.

"What are we?" I asked, not caring that it's supposedly annoying or stupid for a girl to ask that.

Hemmings sighed and handed me the tea he made and I set it on the desk without taking a sip from it.

"You know, we have sex all the time. Once a week sometimes, and yet we know nothing about each other," I said. "Do you know my favorite color?"

"No."

"Do you know my parents' names?"

"Okay, I get it," he said.

"We have no romantic relationship," I said. "Am I your girlfriend?"

"I don't know." He covered his eyes.

"Are you having sex with other students?" I asked.

"No, of course not," he said.

"Then why am I not your girlfriend?" I asked.

"I don't know," he said, standing up and beginning to pace. "Daisy, I need time to think."

I crossed my arms, staring straight ahead of me. I thought about everything going on in my life. I didn't like this. I didn't like being that student, or that girl for that matter. It didn't matter if I was having fun or being a reckless teenager and learning from my mistakes later on. I knew these were mistakes and I didn't want to pay for it later even though i knew I'd have to sometime, and I had a bad feeling it would be very soon.

"You know something?" I said finally, and Hemmings looked up at me. "Alex has been spending a lot of time with me lately." His face changed.

"And you know, he asked me on a date yesterday," I continued. "Even after all the bullshit he put me through, I almost said yes because I need more in a relationship than just sex."

I didn't give him any time to react. I got up and left without drinking any of my tea or looking at him again. He can think about it and really absorb it later when I'm gone.

I made my way to the library, then changed my mind and went to the dorms instead. When I got in the room, none of the girls were there, which I was grateful for.

My homework seemed to suck up all my focus, but my mind kept wandering back to Hemmings.

Why would he need time to think? What was he thinking about too? He was probably wondering how to break it to me that I'm just some temporary student-teacher fling he'd always had a kink for growing up. Maybe he lied to me about being married or having a girlfriend and he was just using me because he was lonely. For some reason this idea seemed logical despite everything he said to me before about supposedly caring so much for me.

My heart sank when I realized maybe this was it. What if everything I'd brought up to him just meant that he'd realize how ridiculous this relationship we had was. I mean, I'm only 18 and he's 25. I'm sure he had so many other opportunities to find someone who wasn't just going into uni after she graduates. He would probably find some other girl who was far more sophisticated than some silly little school girl who had a crush on her teacher. The thought made me feel sick to my stomach.

I held it in though, and I put on another faked enthusiastic expression for the girls when they returned. It killed me that I had to keep pretending to be happy instead of actually doing so.


	32. Chapter 32

For the remainder of that week and the week following it as well, I kept my mouth shut in English. I wasn't in the mood, I didn't think Hemmings was after our chat, and I wanted to rip this off quickly and as painlessly as possible, like a bandaid. I knew that if I did it this way it would be as painless as possible.

I knew that hiding these from the girls was going to eventually catch up to me and make me feel guilty sometime. When it finally did, I knew I needed to admit what I'd done to someone, so I went to the first person I knew wouldn't judge me for it.

"El," I sat down next to my best friend on her bed and she looked up at me from her homework that she was working on.

"Hey Daisy," she said.

"Do you have a bit of time to spare?" I asked. "There's something I need to get off my chest and tell you."

"Sure," she closed her book and moved it aside. "What is it?"

"We should probably go for a walk."

-

I walked with Eleanor through town, working on how I was going to tell her exactly. I wasn't sure how she would react. She finally questioned me enough times to drag it out of me and I stopped with her outside the coffee place we usually went to together.

"Okay," I said. "You know all those times that I would mouth off to Hemmings in English."

"Yes," she nodded.

"And you know how I would always get detention afterwards?" I said, opening the door for us to go inside.

"Yes?" She looked confused, then her face changed and her jaw dropped. "Oh my god, are you serious?"

I sighed and sat down at a table. "Yes."

"Every single time?" She asked.

"Yeah."

"Goodness gracious, Daisy!" She exclaimed. "I was wondering what ever happened between the two of you after that one night. Why did you keep it from me for so long?"

"Honestly, I was afraid that you would judge me for every time that i'd get 'detention' in his class," I said.

"Are you kidding?!" She laughed. "I would be rooting you on every time!"

I laughed with my best friend, relieved that I'd gotten this off of my chest to someone. "There has been some problems though."

"Oh man, what this time?" Eleanor asked, frowning and I knew she was right. Every time it seemed like things were okay between us, something else happened.

"Well, I asked him the other day if he was married or if he had a girlfriend back home," I started.

"Oh no."

"No, he said he didn't," I said. "If he did, that would be the end. I may be a hoe but I'm not a home wrecker. Anyway, he said he doesn't know if I'm his girlfriend and he doesn't know what we are. And if I'm being honest, Alex seems like he wants to try things out with me again because he asked me out on a date a couple weeks ago. I told Hemmings about it and that I almost said yes because I need more than just sex in a relationship."

"What did he say?" She asked.

"Well, nothing. I got up and left after that. But before I told him, all he said was that he 'needed time to think.' What does that even mean? I know hardly anything about him because we don't have that romantic aspect of a relationship. We haven't even spoken to each other in almost 2 weeks."

"Daisy, I'm sure everything will work out," she said. "I'm always here if you need me. And I'll kick your ass if you ever take Alex back."

"I'm not going to." I rolled my eyes. "I went through enough bullshit with him, I'm not stupid enough to go back to that."

"Good," she said. "You're better than that and you deserve better than him."

I sighed and stared at the barista behind the counter, though I wasn't in the mood for coffee or anything. "How has your love life been, Eleanor?"

"I am in a fantastic, very committed and very serious relationship with my uni applications and homework."

-

Eleanor and I had made our way back to the school before dinner started and we're hanging out with Blair and Eileen in our rooms, who were playing Mancala. Blair ended up winning and Eileen accused her of cheating and threatened to never do her hair for her again.

We all headed down to the dining hall for dinner together, and as I was walking, I felt another presence next to me and turned to see Alex.

"Hey Daisy," he said. "Do you mind if I sit with you guys for dinner tonight?"

"No, go ahead." I smiled. Hemmings doesn't own me and I'm going to show him that.

We sat down to eat, Eileen and Blair were poking fun at Eleanor, who was doing a good job dishing it back to them, while I laughed at all of them. Alex talked to me about football. I wasn't interested but pretended that I was listening intently to him for the sake of pissing Hemmings off at the staff table.

I made a few jokes, and he of course laughed at them and I glanced over to see Hemmings watching us with steam practically shooting out his ears. I looked away and smirked, knowing that maybe this was the last straw with him.

Despite my smug attitude, I was still worried that Hemmings wouldn't want me. What if this was going to just make him toss me to Alex because he thinks that's what I deserve anyways?

I pushed my paranoia aside for the time being. If he needed his "time and space" then I'll give it to him. But if he gets that he's going to know that I can't sit around waiting forever.


	33. Chapter 33

Sitting in English was weird enough as it was for me. I still wasn't on speaking terms with Hemmings but Alex was still trying to get near me all the time. I didn't have any intentions on getting back together with him but I was certainly going to milk all of his attention into making Hemmings see what he was missing.

All throughout English, Alex kept leaning over and making comments to me from where he was sitting next to me and I would of course giggle at them. Surprisingly, I knew Hemmings was aware of it and I knew he was angry about it but he didn't give me detention even once throughout the entire thing.

As I was getting up to leave after he dismissed the class, he said "Daisy, please stay after. I need to discuss something with you."

I stopped in my tracks, letting Alex go ahead as well as Eleanor, who looked at me questioningly. I shook my head, knowing what she was thinking and informing her silently that I was not about to get laid.

I stood staring at him for a moment as the rest of the students filed out of the classroom. I could tell he was angry. When the last student left the room, he stared back at me without saying anything for a moment, then walked to the door and closed and locked it.

He was definitely angry. I had no idea what I had coming from him, and didn't know what I was expecting when he sighed, took my face in his hands and leaned his forehead against mine. After a few minutes like this, he pulled away from me. "I have an idea."

"I'm listening," I placed my hands in my lap and waited for his idea.

"I think we should keep this same system we have," he said. "But instead of having sex, I think we should talk to each other. We should get to know each other aside from the physical aspect of our relationship or whatever it is that we have."

"Okay," I nodded. "What does this mean?"

"I don't know yet," he said, rubbing the back of his neck and starting to pace. "I don't want to ask you to be my girlfriend yet if I know absolutely nothing about you."

"Okay," I said again.

"I want to get to know you more, Daisy."

"Okay," I nodded once again, grabbing my bag and walking towards the door.

"Hold on." I stopped and turned around, and Hemmings was right behind me. He leaned down and pressed his lips against mine, and I savored it for the moment I had them before he pulled away and let me go back to my room.

-

We started this on Tuesday when I stayed after class with Hemmings and talked to him. I think we both knew that getting into the heavy stuff right away wouldn't be a good idea, so we started by telling each other about our hobbies and interests.

Hemmings told me about how he played guitar and enjoyed doing it when he was stressed but never wanted to pursue it because his love for English was much more important to him. Although he loved English it turned out he was a total nerd and enjoyed doing maths for fun too, and knew that he would definitely go into maths if he ever failed in English. I hated maths and couldn't stand anything to do with it and made that very clear to him when he said that, which made him laugh.

I mostly told him my hobbies about reading (which he already knew) and I told him about how I also enjoyed writing but didn't do much with it. I told him that I like to listen to music but was never really into it that much, or enough to learn to sing well or play an instrument.

Overall, it seemed to be going well so far but the idea still was set in my mind that soon Hemmings was going to realize what he'd gotten into and decide to change his mind.


	34. Chapter 34

That Wednesday during lunch, Eleanor interrogated me about what was going on between Hemmings and I, so I explained his idea about staying and getting to know each other instead of having sex.

"That's exciting, Daisy!" She said, grabbing my arm. "This means he at least wants to make it work!"

"Yeah I guess, but I don't know." I sighed. "What if this makes him realize he doesn't want me?"

"Whatever happens will happen," she said. "You have to be more positive though."

Thursday afternoon was when we first started really talking about each other, but it was mostly me who did the talking. I don't know what I was expecting, but it seemed like he just wanted to listen.

"Why don't you start by just telling me about your past?" He asked once I'd sat down sufficiently uncomfortable for about 10 minutes already.

"What about my past?" I asked.

"I don't know, everything," he shrugged. "I'm trying to get to know you."

I nodded. "Okay. Well, I was born and raised in London, and I went to a private school up until Year 7, when I came here and I've been coming here ever since. You know Eleanor is my best friend, we've known each other since primary school and we both came here when we were old enough and requested to be roomed together, and we were also put into a room with Eileen and Blair, my other friends. I didn't do much exciting as a child, I had a childhood just like anyone else, I guess."

"What do you want to do after you graduate?" He asked.

"I plan on graduating and going to uni, like I've already told you. I think I want to major in journalism but I don't know exactly yet. I hope someday I can become a journalist and maybe even publish a book of my own but who knows if I'll get that far."

"I know you will," he said. "You're very smart and ambitious and I know you can do anything you apply yourself to."

"Thanks." I smiled, feeling a blush creeping into my cheeks. "Although I don't think I'd do too well in maths."

"I think you could do well even in maths if you wanted."

"Well I certainly don't want to," I rolled my eyes. "Gross."

I told Hemmings a little more, like where I wanted to travel someday and the type of house I want to live in when I settle in somewhere.

"What about your past relationships?" He asked. "Tell me about those."

"Oh." I frowned thinking about Alex and how much of an asshole he really was. Hemmings placed his hand on my knee.

"Well, my first relationship lasted about 10 months and it was with this guy at the beginning of year 10," I said. "It was a little serious I guess, but it just didn't work out. I guess we just got bored of each other. I did lose my virginity to him though, so he was a little significant to me in that way. And then I dated Alex for almost 10 months too. I met him 4th quarter when we were in the same history class together year 11 and we got close pretty quickly. He was sweet at first and my friends loved him and they thought he was perfect for me."

"But?"

"Everything was perfect over the summer," I explained. "We just went for hikes all the time and he'd sneak into my room after my parents went to bed and I mean, sometimes we'd have sex, sometimes we'd just lay together and talk and enjoy each others' company. I think the reason it all worked over the summer was because neither of us were stressed and whenever we'd get into a fight we'd just fuck and then we'd get over it. We never really talked things out, so when school started and we didn't have that option anymore, it was like we didn't know how to actually work things out like a real couple."

"And here I thought the main problem was that he cheated on you," he said.

"No," I sighed. "I mean, that fucking sucked because it was right once I'd restored my faith in our relationship that we could make it work, and then some skank comes and tells me that they made out during a week that we weren't talking. Okay, maybe he didn't cheat on me after that but what if he did? And I hadn't done anything wrong."

"You're right," he said. "Cheating on someone is never okay under any circumstances."

"And you know how it all ended," I said. "After that I felt like I just wasn't good enough for anyone anymore. I didn't even want to be in a relationship until--anyways."

"Daisy, you are so much more than that," he said, reaching and taking my hands. "You are intelligent, witty, and worth so much more than some petty high school relationship with some immature boy."

I didn't reply. I stared down at my hands in my lap and wished he would say something about us. Granted, I didn't know hardly anything about him but I wanted to be with him more than anyone else. And if I was being honest, thinking about Alex was hurting me too. I know he was the past and it didn't matter anymore but it still hurt.

I felt a warm hand on my cheek and I looked up as Hemmings leaned forward and kissed my lips. I let him kiss me for a few seconds before I pulled away, he didn't look ready for me to be done but I wanted to be by myself.

"I have homework I need to do," I said. It wasn't a lie.

He hesitantly pulled away and I stood, grabbing my bag and heading to the library.


	35. Chapter 35

I knew that as soon as our first time of just speaking to each other was over, I was going to hear from Eleanor that I had to tell her everything and how it was going. The thing was that it was too early to tell if this was actually working or not, especially considering I left abruptly after telling him about my ex-boyfriends. That didn't stop her from asking though.

"It's too early to tell," I told her, trying to brush it off.

That Friday afternoon, Luke finally opened up to me about his own life.

"You can probably tell by my accent that I'm not from England," he said, handing me the cup of tea he'd just made me. "I was born and raised in Australia but I always loved England and wanted to move here eventually."

"And you did."

"I did," he smiled, sitting down with me. "I started out by just going to college there. I had one girlfriend in high school, her name was Alecia but we were going in two completely different directions with our lives so we broke up right after graduation. I loved her and I was sad about it but it just wasn't meant to be."

"I'm sorry," I said, though I couldn't lie and say that I wasn't glad.

"It's okay," he shrugged. "Anyways, I started college there and everything was alright, it was actually great until I dated Arzaylea." He stopped and stared at his hands for a moment, laughing a little. "I thought I loved her and that we'd be together forever."

"What happened?" I asked.

He laughed a little and blushed, and my thoughts ran wild wondering what he was about to tell me.

"I need to inform you on some background knowledge first," he said. "I was always kind of a loser and girls always avoided me and kinda stayed away from me."

"But you're so attractive?" I said, not entirely meaning to say it out loud.

He smiled a little at me and looked down. "Well, I guess no one else thought so. Anyways, I was a loser and no girls really liked me, so I was surprised when Arzaylea and her friend Sydney were both flirting with me and trying to get with me at the same time. It caught me off guard quite a bit considering these two really cute girls were both trying to date someone like me. Well, obviously I picked Arzaylea. I'd met her at a party I went to with some of my friends and she approached me before Sydney and I thought she seemed nicer than Sydney anyways. It was weird though, because the entire time that Arzaylea and I were dating, Sydney was still trying to get me to go out with her too. She kept asking me on dates and I had to keep rejecting her. The weird thing was that she only seemed to get annoyed when I rejected her, like it didn't hurt her at all that I didn't want to date her."

"I don't like where this is going," I said.

"You haven't even heard the whole thing," he said. "So I finally got the courage to ask Arzaylea to be my girlfriend, and she said yes. I was so happy, I thought we were perfect for each other. I bought her flowers and I'd come to her apartment that she shared with Sydney and I would cook for her and make her dinner. I even bought her this beautiful promise ring, and I gave it to her one night and that same night I lost my virginity to her. I thought everything was perfect. I'd never been so emotionally invested in someone before. I was in love with her."

"What went wrong?" I asked quietly, scared to find out what his answer would be.

He chuckled a little, then started outright laughing. I stared at him for a minute, a little worried. He was being serious just a minute ago and then he started laughing.

"It was all a lie," he shook his head. "What my entire life revolved around turned out to be a joke. A cruel, sick, fucked up joke."

I stared expectantly, shocked because I'd only heard Luke swear a few times before that one and it was always when we were fucking. Whatever he was about to say could not possibly be good.

He turned to face me more. "Arzaylea and Sydney made this bet that same night that Arzaylea had approached me to talk to me. This whole bet was revolved around who could get the dorky guy's virginity first. I was a pawn in a game they were playing and my feelings and morals and everything I stood for I threw away for Arzaylea just to see her laugh in my face when she handed me back the promise ring and told me about the bet the morning after."

"Oh my god." My mouth dropped open, unable to believe that anyone could be so cruel. I thought that what Alex did was awful but that was nothing compared to this.

"I mean, needless to say I was devastated. She was also cheating on me the entire time we were 'together.' She and her friends were also betting on top of the bet to see how long it would take her to do it. I was so mortified that I transferred colleges to get away from them and make sure I'd never see them again. I transferred to a university here in England and finished college out here. I got the hell away from all of that and decided to go after my real goals and dreams in life."

"Luke, I cannot believe that someone would do such a thing," I said, standing from my chair to be closer to him, wrapping my around around his body and holding him close to me. "I would never do something so terrible and evil to you, ever. I promise."

"I know," he sighed. "There's something I need to also tell you, Daisy."

"What is it?" I asked. He pulled away enough so he could look at me.

"I didn't turn you down because you're a student," he said. "I wasn't worried about that at all, I know how to keep a relationship like this with you and not have anyone find out about it. In fact, ever since the day you walked into my classroom and mouthed off to me and made a comment about me bending you over my desk, I had thoughts about doing that to you. I accepted the job here thinking that I'd be away from women for a while before I could figure out how to trust someone again after what Arzaylea put me through. Telling you that what was happening was inappropriate was all a way to cover my insecurities."

"Insecurities about what?" I asked.

"I was afraid that another beautiful girl would come and act like an angel and then take advantage of me and break my heart again," he said. "Especially with high school girls, who could fuck the new young teacher first."

"No, Luke," I shook my head. "This is all real. I want to be with you and I'm not just doing this as a joke or some petty bet. My feelings for you are real and I don't ever want you to think otherwise."

"I know," he said, taking my face in his hand. "I see that now, after everything I've put you through and I can't tell you how sorry I am for all the times that I brushed you aside."

"This isn't about me," I said. "Luke I'm so sorry that you had to go through that. I promise I want something real with you."

He brushed my hair from my face and leaned forward to kiss me. Everything was clear to me now, and this changed the entire game--no awfully fucked up pun intended.


	36. Chapter 36

After our conversation about Arzaylea and the way she treated him, I began looking at Luke in a whole new light. No longer was he this asshole who was always out to get me and make my life miserable. I saw the way he smiled and laughed with me, the way that even though some girl broke his heart and crushed his spirits he was able to find a way to recover and function like a human being again. I noticed the hesitation behind his kisses, and the way he seemed unsure of certain things when it came to showing affection when it was just the two of us. Like when he'd stare at me for a moment before he leaned down and kissed my forehead when I was doing homework. Or the way he'd invite me to stay and do my homework in his classroom, and he'd turn on James Taylor and hum softly to the songs while I tried to do my homework but was so easily distracted by him. It didn't take me long to realize that I really liked him and I really wanted to be with him, teacher or not.

Eleanor had been excelling in English alongside me, and made the decision to take the advanced English class her final quarter with me as well and sat next to me during our last period of the day.

As for Alex, I kept him distanced far into the friend zone. I didn't want to be with him anyways, but especially after everything with Luke I didn't want him back. I just wanted Luke, and no one else.

"Hello ladies," Eileen and Blair came and sat down with Eleanor and I in the library one day after class with notebooks in their hands.

"Well hello, Eileen, Blair," I smiled at their enthusiasm. "What's this?"

"The two of us are beginning to plan our graduation party and we were wondering if we came across to you guys as more purple and green kind of people or blue and yellow?"

"Definitely blue and yellow," I said. "El, we need to plan our graduation party soon too."

"I completely forgot about that," Eleanor said. "And I agree, blue and yellow."

"We aren't really purple and green either though," I said. "I think we're more like red and brown."

"Ew," Blair laughed. "You could not pick worse colors to go together could you?"

"Oh shut up," I nudged her and Eleanor laughed.

"I mean, she is gay, she knows best," she shrugged.

"Okay, we'll figure it out later," I said. "What day are you guys planning on? So we don't plan them for the same day."

"We were going to do our the day after we graduate," Eileen said. "That way it's not the day of and everyone from this school always does it 2 days after, so more people are going to show up to ours."

Eleanor and I listened as they both discussed details for their graduation party and laughed at the goofy girls bickering about petty things.

"Are things going well with you and Hemmings?" Eleanor asked me. Now that I'd gotten used to addressing him by his first name, it was weird hearing him addressed by his last name by others.

"Yes, for once," I said and she laughed.

"Have you made things official?" She asked.

"No, but I'm not worried about that right now," I said. "I think what we're doing now is perfectly fine and it'll happen in the right time."

"Whenever it happens I better be the first to know," she said, nudging me.

"You will, don't worry." I packed up the rest of my homework. "Will you walk to dinner with me?"

"I would be honored," she giggled, packing up the rest of her homework as well.

For once, things finally seemed to be coming together.


	37. Chapter 37

"We definitely should not have dark colors," I said. "People will think we're emo."

"You are emo," Eleanor rolled her eyes at me as she clicked her pen against the table. I took a sip from my tea and glared at her.

"You know my emo phase ended in Year 7," I scoffed.

"Oh please, you still scream the words to Welcome to the Black Parade every time it comes on."

"It's part of the nostalgia."

"Or you'll just always be emo."

"Eleanor!" She bursted out laughing and I threw a crumb from my muffin at her. We'd been in this coffee place trying to plan our graduation party for over an hour and it had been going exactly like this the entire time.

"Okay, why don't we decide on snacks first?" I asked. "Everyone loves crackers, but we have to make sure we get a gluten free option for Eileen."

"Yes, and I'm sure there will be some vegan that will end up at our party too so we might as well plan for that also," she scribbled down on her notepad and I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Plan for what?" I looked up to see Alex standing above me smiling, sitting down in the booth next to me. I moved over to make more room for him so I wasn't sitting right up against him.

"Daisy and I are planning our graduation party," Eleanor informed him. She didn't seem too pleased with the fact that he was there.

"Well I better be invited," he smiled at me, leaning over and nudging my arm.

"You will be," I smiled back.

"Great. I would love to sit and listen to you guys chat about your girly party plans but I've got an ass load of homework to do, so I'll see you ladies around." I waved goodbye to Alex and Eleanor raised an eyebrow at me.

"What was that about?"

"We're friends," I shrugged. "He's alright I guess. I'm certainly not going to date him ever again, though, and I'm completely devoted to Luke--I mean Hemmings anyways."

"How are things with you guys by the way?" She asked.

"They're good," I said. "We still aren't officially together though."

Eleanor frowned. "I'm sorry, but it seems like he's happy with you?"

"Yeah," I said. "I'm trusting that he's just waiting for the right time to do it."

"I think so too," she said. "I don't think even a real asshole would tell you so much about himself and lead you on for this long."

Eleanor and I worked on planning for a while after that, then met up with Eileen and Blair, who wanted to go for a walk to catch up on each other's lives because we'd all been beyond busy.

"I still have no interest in a relationship because we'll probably break up after we graduate anyways," Eleanor said when Eileen asked if she even had an interest in someone.

"How are things with you and Karen?" I asked Blair.

"Oh," she turned a little pink. "Uh, we broke up a while ago."

"What?!" Eileen stopped and grabbed Blair's arm. "Why didn't you tell us?!"

She shrugged. "I don't know. But things just weren't working out anymore. I'm happier anyways."

"You have GOT to stop waiting so long to tell me these things!" Eileen scolded her, and we all laughed.

"And what about you and Hemmings?" Blair asked me, and I explained to them the same thing I'd explained to Eleanor earlier.

Hanging out with the girls was goofy and fun, as it always is. It was hard to believe we'd be graduating in a few months and we wouldn't be seeing each other everyday anymore.

On Sunday evening, I went in to Professor Irwin's classroom for some extra help with philosophy homework I didn't quite understand. I worked at the questions with him and he helped me through them, and before long it all made sense and I was breezing through it on my own.

"I think you've been working hard enough," Irwin said as I finished answering my last question. "If you've got nowhere to be, we can play a game of chess if you'd like."

"Oh, sure," I nodded. "It's been a while so I'll be a bit rusty but I'd certainly love to play."

Irwin set up the chess board and pieces while I packed my work away, then I sat down in front of him to play.

We chatted a bit while we played, though both of us were focused on the game a lot more. I surprised even myself when I managed to corner his king with no way out.

"Check mate." I smiled and he sat with his mouth wide open.

"How did you just do that?!" He seemed shocked at the fact that I'd just beat him at his own favorite game.

"Oh boy, what kind of trouble is Miss Williams causing this time?" My heart fluttered at a familiar voice and I turned around to see Luke walk in, holding a stack of papers and smiling at us both.

"Beating me at chess!" Irwin laughed, recovering from his shock.

"Really?" Luke set the stack of papers and smirked at me. "I'd like to see this for myself."

"Well I've got nowhere to be, if you'd like to play against her then you can," Irwin said as he approached the table and I reset the game board for us.

Sure enough, after a little while and a ton of concentration, I beat Luke as well and I laughed when I cornered his king very similar to how I cornered Irwin's.

"Check mate." I crossed my arms, pleased with myself and how well I still was after not playing for a while.

"Wow," he chuckled. "I'm very impressed."

"So am I," Irwin said from where he was sitting at his desk grading papers, somewhat watching our game as he did so.

"It's been a while since I've played too," I shrugged. "I guess I've just got a gift."

"You certainly do," Irwin smiled. "Although it is getting late and I would advise the gifted chess player to head to her dorm and get some sleep."

"That sounds like an excellent idea," I said. "Goodnight, professors."

I went to bed smirking, knowing that Luke was going to want revenge for me whooping his ass tomorrow.


	38. Chapter 38

I walked to English with Eleanor Monday morning at the start of our last quarter feeling good for once. I had a feeling things were finally coming together for once, and my optimism was finally taking the lead.

I sat down, smiling at Luke when I sat in my usual spot, Eleanor right next to me. He looked at me, a small smile on his face before he turned away to greet another student and I turned to Eleanor.

"That was cute," she nudged me.

"So is he," I winked and she laughed.

"Okay that was gay."

The bell rang for us to be in our seats, and Luke started class immediately like he always does.

"You're late," he called out a student that came running into the room, sliding into the nearest empty desk.

"I'm sorry, professor, I--"

"No excuses," he cut him off. "If you're late to my class again, I won't hesitate to give you detention."

"Yes sir."

I twirled a strand of my hair around my finger, waiting for the class to begin and the actual challenge for once this year.

"This English class isn't going to be like the one you took all year," he explained. "It will be much more difficult, require much more time, effort and mental focus."

"It's about time," I mumbled.

Luke glanced at me, raised his eyebrow and continued speaking to the class. Clearly he didn't get my hint. I guess I'll have to be a little more sassy.

"Your first assignment tonight will be to write a summary on the most difficult novel or play you've been able to read and understand completely," he said.

"What if everything is so easy for me to read that I can't figure out what the most difficult is because it's all the same to me?" I asked without raising my hand.

Luke turned to me. "Then pick one that you know is higher level."

"But how am I supposed to know what classifies as 'higher level'?"

"You are a smart girl, Miss Williams. I'm sure you can figure it out. If you speak without raising your hand one more time then you'll land yourself a seat in detention."

"I'm feeling like pushing my luck today," I said, leaning forward and placing my head in my hands, smirking at him. His cheeks turned pink as he finally seemed to realize what I was doing.

"Great, then you've earned yourself a VIP pass to 30 minutes in here after class," he turned around so no one could see him smirking, but I knew it was there.

I sat back in my seat pretending to pout. The entire class seemed shocked at my attitude and Eleanor just looked over at me smirking and giving me a wink. She knew what was coming.

I remained in my seat as the classroom emptied after the bell rang. I tapped my pencil against my notebook, Luke watching everyone leave. As the door shut after the last person left, Luke walked over to lock it, turning around and approaching my desk. He crossed his arms, standing over me. I smiled back up at him innocently.

"It seems that you've gotten a little cocky lately," he said. "I think someone needs to be punished to see just where they stand. I am your professor you know."

"I am well aware," I nodded. "However, I think you're only butt hurt because I whooped your ass at chess yesterday."

He leaned down in front of my face, my heart rate picking up like it always does when I'm around him. "How would you like it if I whooped your ass over my desk? Or my knee?"

"You know how I like it." I leaned forward and kissed him with force, and he kissed back for a few moments before he pulled back and I stood from my desk and grabbed him to kiss him again, missing the feeling of his lips against mine and his hands on my skin. I pulled him closer and closer to me, the familiar fire in my chest igniting like every time I'd kiss him like this.

His hands wandered down my body, backing me into his desk as he kissed me feverishly, sitting on top of his desk. His lips moved from mine to my neck, biting down the way he knows drives me crazy. A small moan escaped my lips, his large hands spreading my legs apart as I reached to undo his belt buckle. We hadn't done anything like this with each other in so long that neither of us wanted to even mess around and tease. There was something different this time about the way he seemed hungry for my touch and my body, the way it seemed like he couldn't get enough of me and I knew I couldn't get enough of him. I pulled him closer to me, tangling my fingers through his hair and he let out a short groan when I tugged on it, his deep voice resonating against my skin.

His hands moved up my thighs, pushing my skirt up and his fingers hooking around my panties. There was definitely something different this time, knowing who he is and about his past and what made him the way he is now. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

-

"Hello girls," I smiled at them as I opened the door to our dorm, the 3 of them doing their homework on their beds quietly, and I earned 3 smiling faces in return.

"Someone's in a good mood," Eileen noted. Eleanor looked at me suggestively, as if to say "I know why" and I felt my cheeks flush but brushed it off.

"I'm just having a good day," I said, sitting on my own bed and pulling out my homework.

"Didn't you have detention?" Blair asked.

"Yep," I nodded. "I got some of my homework done during it."

Eleanor rolled her eyes from where she was sitting and I almost laughed.

"I guess that could be a good thing," she shrugged.

As I worked on my homework, my mind drifted to Luke like it always does. I loved having this, both aspects of a relationship with him, sexual and romantic, and it seemed to be working out wonderfully. I held my hopes that maybe he would be ready to make things official soon, but at the same time a worry set in my mind that he didn't see it that way. I tried to tell myself that he wouldn't keep pursuing me if he didn't feel that way, but a small voice kept telling me I'm just a temporary fling to him.

As much as I tried not to worry, I couldn't stop myself from worrying. I wanted to have a future with him and I could only hope that he wanted the same.


	39. Chapter 39

Before I even knew it, the final quarter of the school year was flying right by me and time seemed to slip away right between my fingers. Luke and I kept up our relationship that we had, acting like a couple but never actually making anything official. Graduation was coming up so quickly and I was worrying more and more that things were going to end once I graduated. For once, graduation was something I wasn't looking forward to. I'd been wanting to graduate for 2 years and now that I was right under my nose, I wanted anything but that.

I pushed my worry aside as much as I could and tried to ignore it and enjoy the last bit of time I had with the girls. I cherished every second I got with them and every laugh we shared, knowing things would change so drastically for all of us when we graduated.

My parents would send me letters in the mail every month or so to see how I'm doing and keep me up to date on things back home, like they had been ever since they sent me to school here. So when I was handed an envelope at dinner one night I wasn't expecting anything special. Eleanor was speaking to me as I held it in my hands without looking at it, but I stopped when I realized the envelope was not in the same usual shape that came from my parents.

My first thought was that maybe they decided to change things up and send an envelope in a different shape, but that didn't make any sense because they'd been sending envelopes with that same shape for 6 years now, why would they change it now? I looked down at the envelope in my hands and realized it was from BPP University, the college I'd been hoping to get accepted into all year.

"Oh my god," I said, rudely interrupting Eleanor but she stopped talking and scooted closer to me as soon as she realized what was in my hands.

"Well open it!" She hit my arm and I took a deep breath as I used my finger to tear under the envelope, and also by now had caught the attention of Alex, who was sitting with us that day, and Eileen and Blair sitting on the other side of the table.

"Is it from BPP?" Eileen asked and I nodded.

I carefully opened the letter and held it in my hands, reading quickly. I let my face fall as I turned and looked up at my friends.

"Oh no," Blair said quietly.

"I got accepted!" I quickly turned it back around on them and they all practically screamed in excitement and hugged me, telling me how happy and proud they were for me, even Alex.

"Wow, Daisy that's so amazing!" Eleanor said. "I always knew you could do it!"

Throughout the remainder of our dinner, my problem with where I stood with Luke was the least of my worries. I enjoyed my food and my dessert especially, unable to stop smiling at the wonderful news I'd finally received. I texted my parents both to let them know I'd been accepted and they sent back excited and proud replies just like all my friends.

As I walked back to our room with the girls, I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned around to see Luke, and we just so happened to be standing right outside his classroom since it was on the way back to our rooms.

"I'll catch up," I said to Eleanor and he took my arm and I stepped into his classroom with him, he shut and locked the door.

"What was all that excitement about at the table?" He asked, confusion in his voice.

"I got accepted into BPP!" I couldn't help but smile as I shared the news and his face also broke into a huge grin.

"Really?! Oh my god, Daisy that's wonderful!" He scooped me into a big hug and lifted me off the ground, spinning me around a few times. "I'm so proud of you! I always knew you could do it!"

"Even when I was being a pain in the ass at the beginning of the year?" I raised my eyebrow at him.

"Yes," he kept smiling and took my face in his big hands, leaning forward and kissing me.

"And even when I hated you and you hated me?"

"I never hated you," he said. "Sometimes you'd piss me off and I'd want to fuck the shit out of you but I never hated you. And I refuse to believe that you ever hated me."

His words set off a heat between my legs but I pushed it aside knowing we couldn't do anything right at that moment. "Okay, I wished death upon you a couple times but I never hated you."

Luke chuckled and kissed me again, and I kissed back passionately, feeling like I hadn't gotten enough chances to actually kiss him lately. I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and kept him close to me while his hands moved from my face to my waist, our kiss getting more heated. Our lips worked together as he backed me into one of the desks next to me and lifted me onto it, his hands moving back to my neck and my face and never breaking our kiss. He began slowing down a little, which was probably a good thing because if he hadn't I would have wanted to fuck him right then and there.

"If I don't get back to my room pretty soon Eleanor is going to think we're in here fucking or something," I said as he leaned his forehead against mine, leaning down to give me one last kiss on my lips.

"Yeah, you should definitely get back to your room and get some sleep," he smiled and pulled away. "Stellar students always sleep well the night before."

I smiled at his compliment, wondering how I'd gotten so lucky to end up with him. I never would have thought we'd be here at the beginning of the year. And although we weren't official, something told me there was a commitment between us that wasn't going to end after I graduated.

"I'll see you tomorrow in class, Daisy," he said as I stood and hugged him once more, pulling away and he pressed a kiss to my forehead. I smiled at him before leaving the room, walking back towards my own room to meet with the girls again.

I knew everything was going to be alright.


	40. Chapter 40

Time continued to slip right between my fingers. I savored it with Luke, not sure if I should be certain that we'd be together after graduation or not and I found myself wishing it hadn't approached to me so quickly. I should have been excited but instead I was nervous and unsure if it was what I really wanted.

Two weeks before graduation, El and I sealed the deal with our party and sent out invitations. I sent them to all of my friends and even people I'd only speak to occasionally. I also invited all my favorite teachers, not wanting it to be suspicious had I only invited Luke. These included Professor Irwin, Clifford, Hood and even my old English professor before Luke, Professor Henderson. Eleanor warned me that it might be awkward having both of them there but I insisted it would be fine.

The last week of school was a nervous blur for me. Although Luke was still being loving and affectionate like always--except in the public eye--he still hadn't said anything about where we stood in our relationship and I was beginning to worry that maybe this was going to be the end.

My parents travelled out of London to our school to watch for my graduation, staying in the nearby town at a hotel for the few days beforehand. I greeted them with hugs and they were very emotional for me but I tried my best to keep them cool. They of course hugged and were emotional over Eleanor too, who was literally family at that point.

"Daisy, your father and I would love to meet your English teacher," my mother said to me when we sat at the cafe for breakfast the morning before my graduation.

My father nodded in agreement. "We'd like to thank him for being such a big help in getting your grade up when it was slipping."

"Mother, I don't see why that's necessary," I said, taking a bite from my muffin.

"We'd just like to meet him," she said. "Most students in public school, their parents will meet their teachers and be on a personal level with them actually."

"I heard he's quite young too," my father said. "He was probably easy to relate to and get to know on a more personal level."

You have no idea.

"Oh yeah, we get along great," I nodded. "He's my favorite teacher actually. He's helped me a lot this year." I stopped and realized that I never would have thought I'd be saying that at the beginning of the year.

"I'm so glad to hear that," my mother smiled at me.

"Well, I'll go find him after we finish eating and you guys can meet him," I said. I knew Luke would be nervous about it but I also knew my parents wouldn't suspect anything and that it would all be fine.

I left my parents in the dining hall, which was only barely populated as most students were still in their classes, but those of us in Year 12 were finished a few days early. I knocked on the door to Luke's room and waited to hear his familiar soft voice say "come in."

I cracked the door open and peeked my head around the corner. He was staring down at a stack of papers in concentration, eyebrows furrowed. He looked up at me from his work and immediately smiled behind his glasses. "Daisy."

I stepped in and greeted him with a smile as well, letting the door shut softly behind me. "My parents want to meet you."

The color and smile drained from his face. Maybe I should have eased the information to him instead of just throwing it at him.

"What?" He croaked out, then cleared his throat. "I mean, why?"

"They want to thank you for helping me get my grade back up and all," I rolled my eyes, approaching him at his desk and hoping that keeping a relaxed demeanor would ease his nerves too. "Don't worry, they don't know about anything and they'll love you."

"Are you sure?" He still looked uneasy, turning in his chair away from his desk to face me better, reaching absentmindedly for my hips to pull me closer.

"Yes," I smiled, allowing him to pull me forward innocently but quickly changing the setting of that and slipping onto his lap. His pale cheeks turned pink at my sudden action and I ran my fingers through his hair, leaning closer to his ear.

"And if it all goes well, I think we should have our own after party tonight after the grad dance," I whispered, pressing a soft kiss right below his earlobe where I knew it drove him crazy. I backed off of him, standing and leaning down to kiss his cheek. I stepped back and saw his face was still quite pink, a nervous expression taking over his features.

"Um... Yeah definitely," he said, nodding.

"To what part of that?" I asked.

"All of it," he rushed out immediately. I smiled at him.

"I'm going to get my parents. They've got their rounds to make though so it should be a couple minutes," I made my way back to the door, intentionally giving my hips a little swing while I walked because I knew he was watching.

-

Despite Luke's nervousness about meeting my parents, they adored him just like I thought they would. It went well and also like I thought, they didn't waste much time in talking to him and just thanking him for helping me get my grade back up before leaving to go do whatever else they felt necessary before my graduation.

I got ready with Eleanor, who was excited beyond expression as she curled her hair, nearly burning herself a couple times due to her excitement. I didn't know how to feel considering I had no idea what it meant for Luke and I but I was enthusiastic for the fact that I got accepted into the college I wanted and I was finally graduating.

El and I headed over to dining hall, which was he only place big enough to hold graduation. I felt an arm grab me and pull me around a corner and into a dark room. I panicked for a moment before I got a whiff of a sweet musky cologne and relaxed knowing it was Luke.

"Luke! I need to be out there in a couple minutes!" I whispered.

"Shh, it's okay." I felt his hands on my face. "I just wanted to tell you personally how proud I am of you, because I won't be allowed to show favoritism out there."

"Thank you," I tried to say but was cut off by his lips against mine, a very rushed kiss, though passionate as I leaned back against the wall behind me from his force. I kissed him back for a few seconds before he pulled away abruptly and gave me a slight shove out the door and back around the corner.

I met back up with Eleanor and went to line up with her for our graduation, holding her hand tightly. The ceremony was long and boring. Cameras flashed at me as I walked, shaking hands with Headmistress Morris and sitting with the rest of my graduating class as a few teachers made annoying speeches. Many parents cried, including my own.

The dance was supposed to be going on pretty much as soon as they could get it after the ceremony, but with all the sentimental parents taking pictures and hugging people and crying, they knew it was going to take much longer.

"Oh, Daisy and Eleanor let me get one of the two of you together!" My mother pulled me towards Eleanor standing meant and I laughed as she wiped her eyes to use her camera and take a picture of the two of us.

"I'm just so proud of both of you!" She turned to my father. "They've grown up so much! Oh, Alex, come here and get a picture with Daisy too!"

"Of course, Mrs. Williams," he smiled at her and put his arm around my shoulder to take a picture with me for my mom. She knew we'd broken up, not the reason why, and she was sad about it but glad that we were still friends. I told her it was because it'd be too hard to stay together going into college.

As I was finishing up the picture with Alex, I turned to see Luke standing taking a picture of the two of us also. I crossed my arms and glared at him, and he started laughing behind his phone and brought the camera down to look at me. "Don't worry, I got that too."

"Why don't you stop taking pictures of me and take one with me?" I said, smiling at him.

"Yes, let's get a picture with all of your teachers, Daisy!" My mother ushered Luke and I beside each other. He awkwardly put his arm over my shoulder, and my mom thankfully took the picture quickly before we attracted too much attention to ourselves.

"Okay mother, that's enough, please," I said after what felt like the millionth picture of the night. "There's a dance I'd like to attend with El."

"Of course, sweetheart," she said, finally lowering her camera. "Your father and I are going back in the morning, a couple hours before your train. We'll see you back in London." I gave them both hugs goodbye and they both kissed my forehead as they left to go back to their hotel.

"I need to get heading back to my dorm with El so we can get ready for the dance," I informed Luke, checking my watch to see it was 7:30pm.

"I understand," he nodded. He discreetly slipped his hand to mine for a brief second, sliding a piece of paper between my fingers before he pulled away and walked off.

I concealed the paper from anyone nearby, including Eleanor so I wouldn't get any questions and because I had no idea what this paper had on it. I walked back with her, chatting excitedly about the fact that we were officially graduates and her expressing how she was going to "get turnt" at the dance tonight.

Eleanor ran into the bathroom needing to pee, and Blair and Eileen were chattering to each other while they got their dresses on for the dance. I took this as my opportunity to look at the paper.

I'd still like to take up your offer on that "after party." Meet me in my office at 11.

My heart fluttered, knowing what this meant as I crumpled the paper and tossed it into a drawer, pretending to be taking out a different bra to wear. I changed quickly into my dress, let Eileen touch up my makeup, slipped on my shoes and headed down to the dance with the girls, excitement buzzing all throughout the halls of the school.

The dance was a ton of fun. Alex appeared to be trying to dance with me but Eleanor kept getting all over me and grinding on me so he would leave me alone, which I was quite alright with and even joined in on the shenanigans. Blair looked a little uncomfortable as did a bunch of the guys around us but honestly, I didn't give a fuck. I almost wished Luke was there to witness it too.

At 10:50 the dance was still in full swing and no one appeared to be wanting to stop. Eleanor was still going crazy and complained when I slipped away to "use the bathroom." I was hoping I'd go unnoticed.

"Just freshening up," I informed her as I walked into the bathroom, checking to make sure my hair still looked good and my makeup wasn't smearing. I had to admit that although I'd never really gone for fitted dresses before, they certainly complimented my curves.

"Well let's get back to it!" She grabbed my arm and tried to drag me back out. "Come on, Daisy, we just graduated and we need to celebrate!"

"I am celebrating, but unfortunately I cannot be in the presence of you guys anymore," I said. Figured I might as well tell her because she'd find out anyways.

She raised an eyebrow at me. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I've got an after party for two to attend," I looked at her suggestively, throwing in a wink for good measure and she seemed to understand.

"Oh my god, Daisy!" She giggled. "You have to give me all the gruesome details tomorrow on the train back. You better get going though, or you'll be late to this 'after party.'"

I rolled my eyes and she slapped my ass as I left the bathroom, making my way down the hall towards Luke's room, my heart pounding. I checked the time to see it was 11:02.

I walked inside quietly, locking the door behind me as I made my way to his office. I knocked a couple times before opening it, and seeing that he'd lit a few candles on the file cabinets and rose petals were scattered on the floor and across his empty desk.

"How romantic," I commented, laughing a little.

"It's the best I could do considering it's an office," he smiled.

"I like it," I walked over to him, wrapping my arms around him as he leaned down to press his lips against mine. "Sorry I'm late, Eleanor was keeping me as usual."

"No worry, that just means we'll have to get started right away," he said in my ear, his warm breath already making me shiver. I stepped back and hit his desk, pulling him with me by his tie. His lips attached to my neck as his hands wrapped around my thighs and lifted me onto his desk. I tilted my head to the side, allowing him to bite down and leave his marks on my skin like he loves to do. My breathing and heart rate picked up, his hand finding its way to the zipper of my dress and pulling it down slowly, his cool hands grazing my hot skin. The contrast was erotic. I let out a soft moan as my dress fell down my shoulders and his hand cupped my breast and massaged it, pushing himself further between my thighs. I lifted my hips so he could pulled my dress off of me and leave it on the floor, kicking my shoes off as I pulled his tie to undo it. I worked quickly to unbutton his shirt, pushing it off his shoulders as he reconnected his lips with mine and unhooked my bra.

I dug my fingers into his back as his hips ground against mine, biting down onto his bare shoulder. Before I even knew it, his pants and underwear were on the floor and he was reaching to pull my panties off.


	41. Chapter 41

Finishing my last bit of packing in the morning with the girls was bittersweet. Most of me was glad to be leaving that awful school but a small part of me was going to miss all the fun I'd had with the girls there. And of course the fact that everything was still in the air with Luke.

As I brought my bags downstairs with the girls, I dropped them off by the door and paced back and forth outside Luke's classroom for about 5 minutes before I took a deep breath and decided I had to do it whether I wanted to or not.

I knocked on the door before letting myself in without an answer. Luke was packing up the remainder of his classroom into a few boxes and smiled over at me as I stopped a few steps inside the closed door.

"Daisy," he smiled at me. "You're officially graduated and out of high school. And you're going to the university you've been wanting to go to for years."

"Yeah," I managed to smile, taking a couple more steps into the classroom.

"What are you doing in here? Don't you have a train to catch soon?" He asked, leaning against the side of his desk.

"They start boarding in a half hour," I said. "I was just coming to say goodbye."

"You'll see me in a few days," he approached me, taking my face into his hands and leaning down to kiss me. I couldn't stop it from happening now, the tears started pouring from my eyes and when he pulled away, I leaned my head against his chest to hide the fact that I was crying.

"Whoa, Daisy," he took my face in his hands and forced me to look up at him. "Why are you crying?"

"This is it," a couple tears fell from my cheeks. "This whole thing we had going, it's all over now. And I was here thinking it was never going to end."

"What?" he asked. "You're ending this?"

"I mean--" I stopped. "Isn't that what you're doing?"

"No," he shook his head. "I promise this isn't the end Daisy. Don't you believe that what we have is real?"

"Yes," I nodded. "With all my heart." 

He leaned down and kissed my nose. "This isn't the end Daisy. You better go catch your train though. I'll be seeing you at your graduation party next week though; don't you worry." 

I nodded and let him kiss me one more time, wiping away my tears and hugging me before I let myself out of his classroom. 

Although Luke was reassuring, I wasn't a part of the excited bustle the girls all had on the train. They were excited to be done with high school, and I was too, but I couldn't muster the same enthusiasm they did with the whole thing on my mind.

"Daisy!" my parents hugged me as I got home, kissing me on the forehead and telling me again how proud they were of me for completing high school so well and getting accepted into the university I'd been wanting my entire high school. 

"I was wondering," I said as we sat and ate our lunch together. "if El could come over and spend the night tonight. We want to celebrate for finally getting through it all."

"Of course!" my mother said. "Eleanor is welcome over anytime she'd like."

"Thank you," I smiled. "We're going shopping first and then we'll be back by dinner."

"Okay dear," she said as I took my plate into the kitchen. 

Walking downtown London in the warm sunny air of June was refreshing after a long, cold winter. It was around 60 degrees outside and it was nice to be able to wear my favorite floral romper again. I tried to dress like I was happier than I was in hopes of fooling El. I knew it was no hope. 

"Something tells me Hemmings didn't seal the deal before you left this morning," she said as she was looking at a dress she wanted me to try on.

"What makes you think that?" I asked. 

"You're so quiet, that's why," she said. "Not to mention you'd be jumping up and down telling me all about it by now. And the fact that you've finally graduated."

I sighed. "No. Nothing was made official."

"Oh Daisy," she also sighed. "You let things worry you so much. You need to have some faith! He didn't end things or you'd be crying your eyes out. You have to stay optimistic; you guys aren't illegal anymore now."

"I suppose you're right," I said. "But it still worries me."

"Daisy come on," she said. "You're not going to spend our time together moping about Hemmings. I got my hands on some vodka and we're going to get crunk tonight."

I laughed at my goofy best friend. "And how did you manage to do that?"

"I've got a few tricks up my sleeve," she winked. 

The night ahead of us was a bit of a blur. We both got relatively drunk and giggled about meaningless bullshit, shushing each other in fear my parents would wake up and find the mess we'd made of ourselves. We thought it would be fun to sneak out into the jacuzzi in the backyard but the small bit of logic I had left decided there was no way we'd be able to keep quiet. 

I eventually passed out, the vodka luckily able to drown out my thoughts about Hemmings for the night and I was finally able to relax and enjoy myself, unaware of the eventful week I had waiting for me when I awoke.


	42. Chapter 42

Long hours of planning and hard work finally paid off when El and I were able to throw our graduation party. El helped me pick out a new floral dress that complimented my curves nicely that, aside from my nervousness about him showing up, I knew would drive Luke crazy. 

El and I greeted our guests as they entered the front door of my house, my parents handing out snacks and drinks as everyone walked about and chatted with each other in the living room. My anxiety about Luke grew every second I heard the doorbell ring and I was shaking the hand of someone that wasn't him. 

"Hey Daisy." Alex smiled at me as he walked in the door, hugging me briefly and also giving El a quick hug, who still despised him but acted the opposite for the sake of our friendship. 

"How's the party going?" he asked me, distracting me from the other guest that was entering the door. 

"Um, I'm not sure," I laughed nervously. "I've only been greeting guests at the door." I leaned in so only he could hear me. "If I'm being honest, I don't even know half of these people." 

He laughed, reaching out and putting his hand on my shoulder. "I think that's how it always goes with parties like this. Hey, you've been greeting people for a while. Don't you think the most important people ought to have shown up by now?" He put his arm on my shoulder and steered me away from the front door.

I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying that the single most important person hadn't actually showed up yet at all, but instead stumbled, "um, yeah I suppose so." 

Alex walked me towards the kitchen, where my parents were telling my grandparents just how proud they were of all the hard work I'd done. 

I looked around and noticed that my old Professor Henderson had managed to show up, and was talking with Eleanor. I smiled and approached them, excusing myself from Alex and my parents.

"Professor Henderson!" I smiled, and he looked back at me, smiling back and opening his arms in a hug. 

"Daisy, Eleanor has just shared with me the wonderful news! You've been accepted!" 

"Yes!" I smiled, my nervousness about Luke suddenly vanishing being able to speak with Henderson again. "I'm so excited to leave this autumn." 

"I always knew you'd be able to do it," he smiled. "Eleanor tells me you gave the new English professor a lot of attitude at first but eventually grew quite close with him." 

"She's right," I blushed. He had no idea just how close.

"He's a very nice man," he said. "I just met him a little bit ago."

"You did?" I asked. "He's here?"

He nodded. "In fact, he's right over there speaking with Professor Irwin."

I turned and saw that he was there just as Henderson said. 

"Please excuse me, I'd like to go greet them," I said. 

"Of course," he smiled. 

I walked over to Irwin and Luke, smiling at him when he looked over and noticed me. His eyes moved down my body, clearly looking at me in the new dress. 

"Hello, Professor Irwin, Hemmings," I smiled at the two of them. 

"Daisy! Congratulations on getting accepted to BPP," Irwin smiled back at me, giving me a comfortable side hug. 

"Thank you, it means a lot," I brushed a stray hair out of my eyes. 

"Yes, congratulations, again," Luke said, reaching out and patting my shoulder. I thanked him and stood in the awkward situation, feeling uncomfortable like I always did when I was with Luke around other teachers. Thank god this was going to be done and over with after tonight. 

"I'd better check on the punch in the kitchen that my mother was finishing up, I'm very thirsty." 

Eventually I had a party in full swing, the adults all drinking a little alcohol like wine and champagne, the girls and myself all stuck drinking punch and sparkling cider. I danced with Eleanor, swinging and spinning around in our dresses and laughing at each other. I knew Luke was watching me from afar. 

The music was turned down and the lights turned down a little to get everyone's attention, my father standing on a chair next to Eleanor's father and clinging his fork lightly against his wine glass. The crowd eventually quieted down and my father smiled at everyone. 

"I know this is all a bit unnecessary, but I just wanted to make a toast to our wonderful daughters," he said, gesturing to Eleanor's father standing next to him. "They've both been wonderful students all throughout their entire schooling; always dedicated, always eager to learn more. Daisy knew exactly what she wanted to do from the time she was in Year 7. She's always been ambitious and chased her dreams and we couldn't be more proud of that."

"Eleanor has always been a joy to have in our lives too," El's father spoke up. "She is very driven, very caring and always has something fun and lighthearted to say. Her goofy nature has always made me smile, from the time she was just a little child and would find worms in the yard just to bring and put in her mother's flower garden, saying they were traveling the world. Our girls are no longer little girls and they are starting a new chapter in their lives and I couldn't be happier for them." 

They both raised their glasses, as did everyone else as they clapped for us and Eleanor smiled and put her arm around me.

"Now, enough with the sappy words! There is cake in the kitchen to be served!" My father climbed down from his chair and the music started back up. 

In the midst of people heading to the kitchen to have cake and people beginning to dance again, I informed Eleanor I was going to step outside for some fresh air and managed to get a moment to myself and stepped out into my mother's flower garden. 

I hummed to myself as I went out and sat on the bench, sighing and looking at the roses that were blooming on the bushes in front of me. My mind wandered back to Luke and what was going to happen after this party. I hadn't even had a moment alone with him the entire party--

"Hey Daisy." I jumped at Alex's voice suddenly approaching me, and he laughed.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

"That's okay," I smiled. "What're you doing out here?"

"Checking on you, actually," he said, sitting down on the bench next to me. "You aren't really the type to sit out in gardens by yourself. That's more of a Blair thing to do." 

"Just needed some fresh air," I smiled. "I've got a lot on my mind."

"Like what?" he asked, moving a little closer to me. 

"Well, I don't know. Everything is just happening really fast. It's a bit scary is all," I forced a laugh, trying to play it off like I was only stressed about graduating. If he actually knew me he'd know it had nothing to do with that because I've been waiting for this moment for 3 years now.

"Well I'm sure you'll do great out there," he said. "You always do."

"You really think so, Alex?" I said, turning and looking at him. I knew he was trying to kiss my ass. I didn't know what his intentions were anymore but I tried to tread carefully especially knowing that I didn't know where I stood with Luke. 

"You've always been great at everything you've done," he said. "I've always admired that about you."

I rolled my eyes. "Please. I'm only good at Eng--" 

I was cut off by warm hands against my face and familiar soft lips against mine, startling me at the same time I heard a voice crack, "What the fuck?"

I pulled away as quickly as I could, not only because I heard Luke and knew he'd seen it but also because I'd expected more warning from Alex if he was going to lean in and kiss me and I was on my guard for that. Unfortunately I wasn't quick enough.

I looked over at Luke, who was holding a small bouquet of daisies, which dropped from his hand and onto the ground. He turned around to begin walking away but I jumped up and tried to follow him, my stomach dropping to my feet. 

"Luke, please, I promise that wasn't what it looked like--"

"I don't want to hear it, Daisy!" He turned around and yelled at me, startling me. Any time he'd yelled at me before, I was yelling back. He'd never had the upper hand like this. 

"Luke, please," I begged. "Let me explain." 

"I've been through this before, and I'm not going to go through it again! I thought you were different, Daisy!" he continued yelling, and thankfully the party was in full motion inside and no one seemed to be aware of what was happening. 

"It's not like that!" I didn't even realize I'd started crying. "Please!"

"It's done!" He turned around and went to walk away. "I'm done with this!" 

"No," I whispered, tears falling from my eyes as I started breathing harder. This was not happening.

I turned around, wanting to go inside and find Eleanor but realized Alex was still standing in front of me, looking confused.

"I don't want to get back together with you, Alex!" I yelled. "Can't you see that?! You hurt me! You hurt me so bad, why would I do that to myself again?!" 

I shoved past him and rushed inside, dodging bodies and finding Eleanor standing at the punch table.

"Eleanor," I grabbed her arm and she turned around, smiling at me and then her smile immediately falling off her face. "Oh my god." 

She didn't question me until she'd successfully pulled me into the bathroom, locking the door behind us.

"He left," I sobbed. "He left and he ended it all, I can't believe it just happened! He had daisies and Alex ruined it all! It's all Alex's fault!" 

"Daisy!" She shook her head. "You're not making any sense. Tell me what happened from the beginning."


	43. Chapter 43

I called him so many times.

From the time the party ended and everyone went home and Eleanor was still with me in my room while my parents tried to clean up a little more, basically all night (except the 3 hours of sleep I'd managed to get after Eleanor left and I laid staring at my ceiling until I drifted off) and in the morning when I woke. 

I left him countless voicemails, begging for him to let me explain and trying to tell him that it wasn't what it looked like. I didn't talk to Alex. I didn't need to talk to him; I told him my piece and I didn't owe him any other explanation other than that. 

Feeling heartbroken was an understatement. 

Eleanor came over and tried to cheer me up, but her effort was a bit wasted.

"Daisy, if Luke doesn't realize that he's the one making a mistake here then he's an idiot," she said. "If he doesn't get that Alex is dead to you then he needs to screw his head on straight first anyways! You deserve so much better than that, Daisy. He hasn't even given you a chance to explain yourself or anything and you at least deserve that."

I could have tried to explain it to her, but she wouldn't understand. She didn't sit and listen to him relive the pain of a girl he loved throwing his feelings in the garbage in exchange for some stupid bet in college. She didn't experience him opening up to her and becoming so vulnerable, knowing just what he was the most insecure about. I knew all these and I betrayed him.

Eleanor left, leaving me to my own devices. After another few calls that were missed, I decided to go outside into my mom's garden. I'd been locked inside too much and hoped that getting some fresh air would clear my mind. 

I sat down on the bench, staring at the same roses I'd been looking at the night before, unchanged but brighter looking in the sunlight of the day. I reached out and touched a petal with my fingers, feeling the smooth velvet-like texture and frowning as I remembered the night Luke had laid rose petals out over his desk in a crude romantic gesture. It seemed ridiculous now looking back on it, but I'd do almost anything to go back to that night. 

I looked away from the roses and noticed the daisies from the night before that Luke had left when he'd dropped them and stormed off. My heart twisted as I walked over to them and almost laughed as I realized he'd probably chosen daisies because of my name. I sat down on the ground next to them and picked them up, then noticed a small envelope sitting on the ground underneath them that I hadn't noticed the night before.

Knowing that opening it and seeing what was inside would make things worse for me, I did it anyways. There was no way that whatever was waiting for me inside this envelope was a bad thing, especially knowing that Luke was so positive about our future before I'd left the school and the fact that there was a bouquet of flowers that was waiting for me with it. 

I pulled out a long handwritten paper, immediately recognizing Luke's slightly messy handwriting. I sighed, taking a second to prepare myself. I put the letter back into the envelope and picked up the bouquet of slightly wilted daisies. 

I went inside, finding a vase and placing the flowers in it, adding a pinch of sugar to the water. I carried it with me into my room, setting it on the table next to my bed, above the same drawer I'd kept my one picture of Luke hidden. I sat on my bed, taking a deep breath and opening the envelope again, finally unfolding the letter and reading it.

My beautiful Daisy,

I have to say, I never thought that the first time you mouthed off to me in class that we'd end up where we are now. I figured at the most we would probably hook up a few times, but nothing would ever come out of it. My mind was still poisoned with the pain Arzaylea had put me through as well, which only added to the lack of knowledge I had about just how special you really are. 

I never thought I'd be able to love anyone again. I thought that after something so horrible had happened to me, I could never open up to another person and let them have so much control over my feelings, and yet here you are. I love you infinitely more than I ever did her. I knew I was in love with you for a long time before. I wanted to wait until graduation had come and passed and there was nothing that could raise suspicion before I made things "official" between us. I guess you could say I was paranoid, but I didn't want either of us getting into trouble, especially since you just were accepted into the college you've been dying to get into for years. 

I know I led you on many times, and I know that I've apologized before but I want to again. I want to tell you I'm sorry for all the times you cried because you thought I didn't want you, all the times you hurt, and all the times Eleanor had to tell you that you're worth much more than I made you feel before. I know you've forgiven me, but I want to be able to make that up to you. I want to be able to prove to you just how special you are, just how deserving you are of someone who loves and cares about you. Not the pieces of shit you've dated in the past (for lack of a better word). 

I never told you how I loved the way your lips looked when you'd pout in class, or the way your long red hair always laid a beautiful mess around your shoulders. You make it look so good and so inviting, how you could look so human but so godly at the same time. I love the way your grey eyes are always so dark in comparison to your porcelain skin, and the way your hands fit around my fingers and in my hair. The amount of beauty you hold is indescribable. Everyone wants you; you're smart, witty, and never afraid to speak your mind. And on top of it all you're incredibly captivating, and have a heart of pure gold. Somehow I was lucky enough to end up with you. 

I don't want to mess around with this anymore. You are the one I want. There never was anyone else and there never will be. I can't imagine a life where I hadn't met you and realized what really was waiting for me in the future. Your laugh makes the sun come out on a cloudy day and your smile could make flowers grow; perhaps that's why your parents named you Daisy. I am so in love with you. Maybe the rest of the world thinks it's wrong because I was your teacher, but as far as I am concerned, the universe put you in my class so we could be together. I wouldn't change it for the entire world.

I know this will be hard because you will be away in college and I will be teaching once again, but I want to make this work. I can send you letters, call you every night, and see each other on holidays. I will put in the effort for you. Just as long as I can be with you in the long run, that's all I want. 

-Luke.

I held the letter to my chest, tears pouring down my cheeks. I'd really done it this time.

I lost him.


	44. Chapter 44

I knew he wasn't going to reply, but I called him anyways. I still left him messages for the following week. I reread his letter twice a day and cried every time I did. I went about my day. I cried in the shower and made myself food, and gradually packed my things for college as my parents were at work.

Eleanor called me and checked in just to make sure things were alright. And I guess they were, aside from the constant pain settled in my chest and the urge to hold myself together no matter what. I tried to read to get my mind off of it, but had no such luck. My mind was plagued. I'd never felt so strongly for anyone before, not even Alex. Luke was all I wanted.

My parents seemed unaware of my off feelings all week. I watched TV with them when they got home and ate the food my mother made for dinner and even complimented the pie she made for our dessert. I went to bed early so they wouldn't know I was actually in my room sulking and staring at the ceiling, wishing things had turned out differently.

I decided that after a week of the same thing over and over again, I needed out. I pulled myself together and went outside, walking around downtown London to try and clear my mind. People walked around me unaware, and I wished I could be like them. No one but me knew I was in pain, and I wished for that kind of bliss.

I found myself walking into a park that El and I used to go to when we were younger in the summer months while we weren't away at school. I sat down on a swing and rocked myself back and forth a few times before giving up and sitting on the grass outside the playground, laying on my back and looking up at the clear blue sky. Mostly clear, anyways. A cloud that looked like something between a cat and a turtle was in the sky directly above me, and I found myself watching it change and transform, convincing myself that I would be like that too someday.

Maybe, as much as I didn't want to admit it, I wasn't going to be with Luke. Maybe there was someone else out there waiting for me, even though he seemed perfect to me right then. All I wanted was Luke, but I told myself over and over again that there was someone out there for me, even if it wasn't going to be Luke.

I stood up, running my hand through my chaos of hair that I hadn't had the energy to keep up on all week to get the excess grass out of it and began walking down the sidewalk. I passed a few trees, stopping and touching them, taking deep breaths and trying to appreciate nature instead of dwelling on my misfortunes. I stopped when I glanced around the tree my hand was resting on, not believing my own eyes when I saw Luke himself sitting on a bench with a small dog, the dog drinking out of a little water bowl. He reached down and scratched the dog behind the ears, his little tail wagging at his touch. Oh how I missed his touch.

Telling myself that it had to be a sign, seeing him here with me, I knew this was my one chance. He wasn't going to answer my calls or messages. This was it. If I didn't fix things now, I never would.

I took a deep breath, keeping my composure as I walked towards the bench. I quietly sat down, the puppy looking at me and wagging his tail.

"I didn't know you were much of a park person," I said softly. He seemed to notice me for the first time, looking over at me, and then immediately turning around and standing up to walk away.

"No, Luke, please!" I jumped up and grabbed his arm, pulling him back around to talk to me. He didn't fight me this time. He sighed and sat down, and I noticed the dark circles under his blue eyes that weren't there before.

"You have to let me explain," I said, his arm slipping from my hands. "Just give me 5 minutes."

"Go on." He looked down at the ground instead of at my face and I knew this was going to be hard.

I couldn't stop them from coming. "I swear, I never meant for any of that to happen." Tears began pouring from my eyes. "I didn't know what Alex's intentions were, I had my guard up. I knew something was fishy from the time he came to the party from the way he was trying to pull me away from everyone at every chance he got. I only went outside to get some air, I was worried that I wouldn't get a second alone with you the entire time I was at the party because there were so many people."

"That doesn't explain why when I walked outside I found you lip-locked with that lying, cheating scumbag!" Luke snapped.

"I know, please just let me explain," I said. "I went outside to breathe a little bit and he followed me out. I was a little skeptically of it, so I kept my guard up and I thought that knowing Alex he would give me a little more warning about leaning in to try and kiss me but he didn't. I wasn't even looking at him, he took my face and kissed me and I swear I was pulling away. It was all at the wrong place and time. You know I would never do that to you, Luke. I am different. I never wanted to hurt you and I never wanted Alex to even follow me out into my mother's garden. All I ever wanted was you all along. I know I fucked up but please, Luke, you have to believe me. I don't talk to Alex anymore and I have no intentions to ever speak with him again, especially after all of this happened."

He sat in silence, his puppy jumping up onto the bench with him and jumping into his lap.

"Luke, please. I'm in love with you. You're all I want. I want to be with you, no one else." I sat down on the bench next to him in defeat.

When he sighed and I saw the hesitation in his face, it all started coming together. I realized that I had been in this situation before. Whether it was the same instance and the same feelings didn't matter. I explained my side. I sucked out all the poison and I tried my best. Apparently it wasn't enough.

"Daisy, I just need some time to think."

I shook my head, my vision clouded with even more of my tears. "It's always going to be like that, isn't it? I've been through this too many times, Luke. I've done my part. I told you how I feel about you. If you were truly as in love with me as you said you were in that letter, you wouldn't need 'time to think' about every instance where you have to decide your feelings for me."

Luke up from the ground at me. "You read that?"

I got up and walked away. I walked back towards my house, ignoring his final comment. When he called my name I began running. I didn't need to be waiting around for someone who can't make up their mind. Eleanor's words played through my mind; it was his mistake. And as much as it hurt, she was right. I didn't need to be hurting all the time because he can't decide if my minor mistakes are worth being with me or not.


	45. Chapter 45

Sitting at home after I blew my top with Luke, I realized finally how much of a fool I was for thinking it could ever work between the two of us. He was my teacher for crying out loud. How could I not have been realistic about this before? I let myself dig too deep of a hole and now I was hurting horribly for it.

The more I thought about it, the harder it became to believe that he truly wanted to be with me in a way that was more than just hooking up with your teacher/student. I was in love with him but I knew there was no way he could be in love with me. 

My mind clouded with all the memories of the times he would pick on me in English and we'd both be so smug about it, knowing we'd end up fucking afterwards. I thought about the times I would laugh with him during our tutoring sessions at something stupid, the way his face and eyes lit up when he smiled. He had the most beautiful smile. It didn't seem real. I convinced myself that it was all a figment of my imagination. That I'd somehow glorified what had really happened between us into thinking that we were in love, just caught in the wrong circumstances. But my life isn't a movie or some romance novel. This is reality and I needed to wake up and face it. 

As hard as it was to face, I began thinking maybe there is no one out there who will truly love me and be crazy about me. As far as I'm concerned Luke is still all I want. I'm not sure I'd deny him if he came crawling back to me simply because I love him with all my existence and I wished more than anything that he'd be as crazy about me as I am about him. He isn't and he never will be. 

And somehow, through all of this I cannot cry anymore. The lump in my throat forms and my mouth goes dry, and the pain in my chest is so prominent but my eyes have ran out of tears to shed. 

I decided to start filling my emptiness with just packing for college. I had half of my miscellaneous junk packed away by the time my parents were home from work. My mother knocked on my door as I was packing up another box, poking her head in smiling at me.

"Daisy, I've just received a letter from BPP in the mail for you," she said, walking in and handing me the envelope. I opened it, glancing over it telling me something about the dorms. 

I set it back down on my bed and went back to my box. "It's just about the dorms."

"Do you mind if I look at it?" she asked.

"Go ahead," I said, continuing to wrap my little glass trinkets in newspaper as I packed them into my box. My mom started talking about the dorms and the benefits of being able to stay in them as you go into college and her experiences in dorms while she was in college, but I wasn't listening. I was off in some daydream about what it would be like if Luke had just happened to be my age and we were going to college together, as a happy couple. 

"Daisy," my mother's voice suddenly pulled me away from my thoughts. 

"Yes, mother?" I put my trinket in the box and looked at her.

"Dear, you seem so off from your usual self? Are you doing alright?" she asked me, stepping into my bedroom more and sitting on my bed. 

"Oh, yeah," I said. "I'm just worried about college. I know I shouldn't be because I'm used to going away from home every year but this is different."

"Oh Daisy, you're going to do great," she said. "You have been great at everything you do, and your father and I raised you to be independent. You are so ready for college, your grades and your ambition tell everyone so." 

"Thank you mother," I managed to smile at her despite the fact that her pep talk didn't do me any favors because college was in fact, the least of my worries. 

"Come on, Daisy," she said, standing up. "Your father should be finishing up dinner pretty soon."


	46. Chapter 46

2 weeks.

It's been exactly 2 weeks since everything ended officially between Luke and I. I've been running every morning when I wake up to try and rid him of my thoughts as best as I can. It's been getting a little easier, functioning as a normal human being. It hurts like hell, but I'm surviving. 

Eleanor wanted to hang out, so I went with her to the lake to go swimming and paddle boarding. The other girls joined us, and we walked together down to the dock, stopping by the shed to get our paddle boards. 

"Hello ladies," a young man stood behind the counter, smiling at us. He had dark hair and green eyes, a nice jawline and smile. He was incredibly attractive, though I found myself unimpressed with his looks like I'd normally be. "What can I do for you today?"

"We'd like to go paddle boarding," Eleanor said, smiling at him sweetly. "The four of us."

"No problem," he said. "10 pounds each."

I reached into my bag and pulled out 10 pounds, sliding it on the counter without looking at him. 

We followed him to the equipment where all the boards, paddles and life vests were.

"It's policy for each of you to wear a life vest," he said, taking one down and handing it to each of us. "Wouldn't want such a pretty girl to get hurt out there in the water." He smirked at me as he handed me mine.

"Thanks," I said quietly, putting it on without another word. 

We'd gotten our boards and paddles and were out on the water before Eleanor said something to me. 

"What the hell, Daisy?" Eleanor said. "He's so hot and he was so flirting with you!" 

"I'm not interested," I shrugged. "I'm not really looking for a relationship right now."

"Did things not work out between you and Hemmings?" Eileen asked me.

I shook my head. "No. I guess he decided that I just wasn't important enough to him."

"I'm so sorry," Blair stood on her paddle board, joining the rest of us as we paddled through the water. "You'll find someone who loves you and will put the effort in for you someday."

When I got home, I lit a few candles in the sun room and pulled out a book, trying to immerse my mind with something else. Going outside reminded me of him. The sun looked like his hair, the sky like his eyes. I closed the book, giving up on it. 

I picked up another from the shelf, a recipe book that I hadn't touched for 3 years since I'd mastered most of the recipes without even looking at them anymore. There was no way a recipe book could remind me of him.

I flipped through the pages, examining the pictures and the recipes. It all looked appetizing but the only image that came to my mind was cooking in the kitchen with Luke, laughing as he did something goofy while I stirred something around in the skillet on the stove. The thought of his hands around my waist and his soft lips on my neck, distracting me from what I was trying to do lingered in my mind and left an ache in my chest. I came back to reality and slammed the book shut, throwing it on the floor. I blew out the candles and stomped up to my room, slamming the door shut. 

I plugged my phone into my speaker and pressed shuffle play on all my music. Every soft, bluesy or acoustic song that came on painted an image in my brain. I would have my arms around his shoulders as he held me close and swayed with me around the living room of our future house. I would laugh at how terrible we both are at dancing but we were having too much fun to stop. His white t-shirt and blue jeans were so different from how I normally saw him but there was something about the way we both were in our socks and slipping on the hardwood floors that made it all okay. He'd spin me around and my sundress would twirl around me, making me feel like a little kid again. He'd brush my messy hair out of my face the way he always did and lean down and give me a gentle kiss on my lips, just for a second. Because it wasn't lust anymore; we were in love and I just wanted to embrace every second with him, whether we were having sex or not. And he felt the same way. I'd be comfortable without a trace of makeup on my face. He'd tell me I'm beautiful. And I'd think the same thing, because he is beautiful, but it would be absurd to say it out loud so I would just look up at the human being that I'd somehow ended up lucky enough to spend the rest of my life with. 

I paced around my room, shaking the image from my head. I would never have my happy ending with Luke no matter badly I wanted that. Love can't be forced. It has to come from both sides and I should have seen that it was only one sided sooner. 

Was it always going to be like this? Everything seemed to remind me of him no matter how much I tried to rid him of my brain. Everything familiar to me was connected to him in some way and I needed out. I wanted to be out of this mess. 

I went into the bathroom, starting to run bath water. Maybe I just needed to relax. I set my phone down on the counter as the bathtub filled, looking at myself in the mirror. My skin seemed pale; paler than usual. The dark circles under my eyes were practically framing my face. I hadn't even touched my makeup in weeks. I picked up my hairbrush, taking a deep breath and beginning to brush out the tangles. It was calming almost, until I remembered the times Luke would play with it, running his fingers through it to take out the tangles. I huffed, setting my brush down. I stared at myself in the mirror. I couldn't keep doing this anymore. 

I looked around on the counter, spotting a pair of scissors and got a crazy idea. 

Gathering my hair in one hand and holding the scissors in my other, I began snipping. I cut probably 10 inches off. I let my hair drop onto the floor, looking at all the long red waves. My safety blanket for years. I'd never had my hair shorter than halfway down my back, and here I was, my hair just past my shoulders. I didn't care that it was a little choppy; I'd have my mom even it out later. I was just relieved to have it all gone. At last something wasn't about Luke. 

Speak of the devil and he shall arrive, I guess.

I looked down at my phone buzzing on the counter. Luke's face lit up the screen. Fuck him. Fuck him and his stupid timing. 

I threw my phone down the hallway. I was tired of all the pain and grief he had caused me. I was not about to open myself up to more. 

"Fuck you, Luke Hemmings," I muttered as I stepped into the bathtub. I sunk down into the bathtub, trying to will the mildly scalding water to burn away any memory of him left in my mind.


	47. Chapter 47

My mother fixed my hair, shocked that I'd actually cut it all off like that. It laid around my shoulders now, still messy but I didn't regret it. 

I sat at the end of the table, eating dinner by myself a few days later. Everything felt so empty. The only sound in my entire house was the clanking of my fork against my plate as I scooped up my green beans to eat them. Gradually I felt the pain from the entire ordeal turning into numbness and I hoped it would stay that way. 

I washed the few dishes I'd used to heat up my leftovers, then went to my bathroom to take off my bra, put on my cotton pajama shorts and brush my teeth. I told myself all the while that I can and will function as a normal human being, with or without Luke. 

I sat on the couch in the living room, flipping mindlessly through the channels on the TV. I didn't really want to watch any of them. I finally settled on some stupid movie I'd seen countless times before that I no longer enjoyed watching but it would probably put me to sleep eventually. 

I jumped at a sudden knock on the door, confused as to who might be showing up at my house at seven in the evening. I wrapped my robe around my body and walked to the door, figuring it was probably Eleanor with a bottle of alcohol wanting to get me hammered to cheer me up, knowing my parents were out of town all weekend. However, I was quite shocked to open the door and see Luke himself holding another bouquet of daisies. 

Coming back to my senses, I went to shut the door on him, but he stopped me from closing it and let himself in. 

"Wait, Daisy," he said. "I need to talk to you." He shut the door behind himself. I turned around so he couldn't see the expression on my face and instead turned off the TV and sat down on the couch. Luke sat on the other side, facing me. 

"How did you know my parents weren't home?" I asked without looking at him.

"I asked Eleanor when you ignored my call the other day," he said. "I didn't know what to do and she said she was planning on surprising you this weekend instead but suggested that I do it instead." 

God damn it Eleanor. 

"Why are you here?" I asked, turning to him. "Did your indecisive mind finally decide that you want me in your life? Because you're wasting your time. I'm done with this back and forth shit." I tried to mask my pain and hurt with acting angry and unaffected but I had to admit to myself that sitting in front of him like this was hard and I had hope that maybe we could work things out. 

"Daisy, I didn't know what I was thinking," he said. "I was stupid for what I did and I know that now and I won't make the same mistakes again. I was too busy comparing you to someone you're not to realize that you were right in front of me the whole time. You are the real blessing in my life, and I was ignorant to that."

I didn't say anything, trying to process what was happening. I didn't want to jump in and forgive him for all he'd put me through right away. He's said it so many times before. 

"I love you Daisy," he said. "I love you more than I could describe. All I want is to be with you."

A couple tears fell from my eyes. I wanted to believe him; I was just so afraid of getting hurt again. "Why should I believe you?"

"Because I'm in love with you," he said, scooting down the couch closer to me, I scooted away but he cornered me into the edge, taking my face in his hands. He used his thumb to brush away my tears like he'd done so many times before. 

"I'm so sorry, Daisy," he said. "I swear I'll never make the same mistake again. I've let you go too many times before and I can't bear another second knowing that you're slowly sitting here slipping away from me little by little."

"I shouldn't trust you," I said. 

"I know," he said. "But please let me prove it." He leaned in and kissed me, leaving no opportunity for me to say anything else to him. I hesitated, but the familiar feeling of his lips against mine, the smooth feeling was too much to resist. I let him kiss me, pull me closer to him and over his lap. My hands rested around his shoulders, one of his around my waist and the other resting on my cheek, holding me close to him as if he were afraid of me getting away, which was probably somewhat true. His kisses moved from my lips down my cheek and jaw, all over my neck, my collar bone, and my chest. He untied my robe with one hand, pushing it off my shoulders and dropping it on the floor behind me. 

"There's a window right there," I said. "My neighbors could see."

"Let's go to your room then," he said, lifting me off the couch and following me up the stairs and down the hallway to my room. Luke shut the door behind me as I walked to my window and pulled the curtains shut. I turned around to see Luke was right on my heels and was right behind me, pulling me close to him and leaning down to kiss me again. His lips moved against mine as he turned me around and laid me back on my bed, lifting my shirt over my head to expose my bare chest. It crossed my mind that this was our first time doing this on an actual bed and in an actual bedroom. 

There was something special and different about it this time, as my hands slid up his shirt and he helped me to pull it over his head. I wasn't used to casual Luke, in a t-shirt and jeans and a little scruff from a couple days of not shaving but it looked so good. Now that I wasn't trying to ignore his presence, I was able to appreciate this Luke in all its glory. The flip of his hair, the tickle on my neck from his scruff that made me shiver as he kissed me, the soft touch of his fingers over my thighs as he pulled my pajama shorts down my legs. 

"I would have shaved my legs if I'd known--" 

"Shh, I don't care," Luke kissed my lips, hushing my remark as he fit himself between my legs, his hips grinding against mine. I laid my head back against my pillows and let him kiss down my chest and stomach, biting my skin here and there, leaving small purplish red marks. He pulled away just long enough to unbutton his jeans and pull them off, leaving them with the rest of our clothes on the floor. 

-

I laid against his bare chest, his heartbeat against my ear as we both enjoyed the blissful silence. A worry still sat in my own chest but I tried to enjoy this moment together while we had it. 

"It's nice being able to do this with you in an actual bed," he said, brushing my hair away from my face. "More special."

"Yeah," I sighed. "It's a lot more comfortable than a desk."

He chuckled, rolling over to face me and kiss my forehead. He kissed my cheek, then my lips and looked down at me. 

"Luke," I said. He continued looking down at me. "What's going to happen now?"

"I don't know, honestly," he said. "But whatever it is, I want it to be with you."

He kissed me again, and at long last I felt more relieved. "Are you sure?"

"Of course I am," he said. "I told you, Daisy. I'm not making the same mistake again."

"So what happens with us now?" I asked. 

"I wanted to make things official," he said. "And as far as I'm concerned, ever doubting that was a mistake. So I want things official with us."

"You want me to be your girlfriend?" I asked. "Not just a student-teacher fling?"

"I'm in love with you, Daisy. Be my girlfriend."

I smiled up at him. "Okay." He leaned down and kissed me again, lingering on my lips for a second longer than usual. 

"I love your haircut, by the way."


	48. Chapter 48

Keeping my relationship with Luke secret from my parents was the hardest part, especially considering he had to go back and teach again in the fall. I knew it was because of what Alex had done to me, but I couldn't help but worry that he'd have an affair with some other student and that he'd treat her the exact same way he treated me. But even despite all the fears and doubts in my mind that I had, I knew how Luke felt about me. He wouldn't have gone out of his way and through the trouble of coming back to find me and talk it out with me if he didn't care. We had a lot of work to do but I knew we could do it. I loved him, and I knew that he loved me.

Throughout the summer off, I spent a lot of time with Luke and met up with him regularly. Sometimes we'd get a smoothie together and walk around London, a few times we went to see a movie or he took me to dinner, and he even took me on the London Eye for the first time in probably 10 years or so. I forgot just how much I was afraid of heights before hand, and I swore I'd never go on it again after that but knew that I probably would anyways.

And of course along with the fun romantic times we spent together during the summer, there were times when he would take me to his apartment he stayed at during the summer and we'd relive the days we spent in the back of his office, but in a comfortable bed instead, or maybe on the couch, in the shower, on the kitchen counter... I was over at his apartment a lot.

He explained that he stayed in his apartment only during the summer months, and when he came home from holidays, he would just go back home to his family in Australia. He promised that I'd get to meet his mother eventually, and that she'd absolutely love me and I'd feel welcomed right away. He wanted to wait and let it seem less suspicious for us meeting and being so serious seeing as he couldn't really open up and be honest about the fact that I was his student given the judgment that would be passed for it. I was fine with it, and had no intentions on telling my parents anytime soon for the same reason.

I knew that it wouldn't be long before that summer would end and I dreaded it horribly. I knew that I would be away at college and Luke would be away teaching at school and we wouldn't be able to see each other for months at a time. I wasn't looking forward to this, but I was trying to savor every moment I had left with Luke while it lasted.

Eleanor came over and spent the night at my house one more time before we left for college. The feelings were weird and bittersweet. Eleanor and I had been going to the same school together for as long as we had both even been in school, and it was hard realizing that this would be the first time without us doing that.

"I cannot tell you how happy I am that you and Hemmings finally worked everything out," she said as we sat sipping at our shared bottle of wine that she had sneaked over for us, my parents had long been in bed. "I really had faith that he wasn't a prick like Alex and he almost proved me wrong."

"No, and I am never speaking to Alex again," I rolled my eyes, taking a long swig of the bottle. "I was starting to reach a point where I was sure that things were really over between us."

"Me too," she sighed. "I'm kind of jealous. You get a hot boyfriend who's also a teacher who is all grown up and independent and SO good looking." She giggled.

"Yeah, yeah," I rolled my eyes but also giggled, knowing she was right. "You know for once, I'm not annoyed that you're talking about him like that, because I know you're right."

"Of course I'm right, I'm me," she flipped her hair back. "By the way, what's with the new haircut?"

"I had a break down," I shrugged. "You know, thought things weren't going to work out, wanted to get rid of something. It was an act of impulse. I thought I'd end up regretting it but I kind of love it."

"I love it too," she agreed. "I never imagined you with short hair but it looks really good on you."

"I know," I said dramatically, twirling my hair and she giggled.

"Alright enough of that, we need to take some pictures together for the sake of not seeing each other for the foreseeable future, which I am trying not to show that I'm actually devastated about."

Eleanor and I promised to speak to each other as much as could each day while we were away at uni. I tried not to be too upset thinking about school without my best friend and now, boyfriend.

I still had a few nights with Luke, which was relieving but also frightening at the same time after spending most of the summer together and about to go to not seeing each other again for possibly months at a time.

It felt surreal, but I tried to keep myself calm about it. We could make this work, if he's committed to me like I am to him. I'm sure of it.


	49. Chapter 49

"I don't want you to leave until Christmas," I said, sitting on the counter of Luke's kitchen in his apartment while he made us dinner.

"Hey, we're not thinking about that right now," he said, eyeing me twirling my hair with a frown. "Don't give me all that bad energy, it's going to make the alfredo taste bad."

"Okay, okay," I sighed. "I'll hold off until later."

He smirked at me, and I managed to give him a small smile back. "That's more like it. And besides, you know I'm going to call you and Skype as much as I can, and write you letters, and see you on holidays and stuff. You'll hear from me so much you'll start getting sick of me."

"That's unlikely," I rolled my eyes. "I put up with an entire school year of getting on your nerves just fine and look where we are now."

"Well I wasn't praising you and constantly telling you that you're beautiful and all the other sappy things I do now," he said. "It's easier to get tired of that."

"Well if you knew about half the things I think about you when you'd have been tired of me the first week you knew me," I smiled.

He rolled his eyes. "If you don't remember correctly, I WAS tired of you the first week."

I let out a genuinely whole-hearted laugh at his comment, glad that we had come as far as we had. He laughed with me, finishing up the alfredo sauce he was making and dishing our pasta and salad for ourselves.

Luke's dinner was delicious, as it always was, and cuddled up together in bed after a game of chess, which I had beat him at like always.

Laying with him and knowing it was our last night together was hard, my head against his chest, and I couldn't help it even though he had insisted that I not dwell on it so much. I couldn't stop the tears from coming to my eyes.

"Hey come on, don't cry Daisy." He reached over and brushed my tears away, leaning in and kissing me. "We're here together now, that's all that matters."

I nodded, and he leaned in and kissed me again, longer this time, more intention to try to get my mind off of it. I let him, soaking in his embrace and enjoying the time I had with him while it still lasted. He rolled onto his side to continue his kisses, pushing my hair from my face, his hand slowly trailing down to my collar bone, down my chest, resting near my hips and slowly slipping his hand into my panties. I gasped softly into his kiss as he slipped a finger into me.

"One more time tonight for old times sake?" He asked, winking at me. I managed to giggle a little, but was quickly cut off as he added another finger and I moaned softly, rolling over so I was on top and he pulled my shirt over my head.

"I love you so much," I said, leaning down to kiss him again and he moaned softly as I pushed my hips against his. I tugged his shirt over his head, kissing down his chest and down to his sweatpants where I pulled them down his legs and freed his already hard erection. I sucked him into my mouth, earning a gasp as he touched my head gently at first, but then pulled me away and said, "no, I want all of you tonight."

He pulled me back up close to him, flipping us over again so he was over me, pulling my own pajama pants and panties down my legs, kissing my thighs and spreading them apart before leaning down with his tongue and using it against my core. I moaned again, his soft tongue against me doing criminal things to my body like it always does. It wasn't long before I had tugged him back towards me, and he was reaching into his drawer for a condom.

-

I had passed out in Luke's arms that night, sleeping soundly within the comfort of his embrace until I had to wake in the morning and help him pack up the last of his minimal belongings.

The morning was quiet, neither of us wanting to face the reality of the situation. I didn't say anything to him actually, until we were at the train station and it was time to actually say goodbye.

"Am I allowed to cry now?" I asked, but tears were already coming out and there was no stopping it this time.

"No," he said softly, pulling me in for a tight hug. "You know I'm not going to stop thinking about you the whole time."

"Me too," I said, hugging him tighter to me. I didn't want this moment to end, but I knew it had to. I pulled away and he leaned down and gave me a passionate kiss on the lips.

"I'll call you tonight, I promise," he said. "And you're going to do great at uni and I can't wait for you to tell me all about your first day."

I smiled at him through my tears, kissing him one more time. "I love you so much, Luke."

"I love you too, Daisy." He kisses my forehead before releasing me. "It'll be okay. I promise."

I nodded. "I know." I sure hoped it would.

-

Luke kept his promise to me, just like I did to him. He called me regularly, multiple times a week, telling me how much he missed me. I tried not to cry as much as I could. I missed him so much but it got easier knowing I had days I would see him again to hold onto.

His calls and words of validation were comforting, and I trusted him, but still couldn't help but worry when we had short phone calls. I knew he wouldn't cheat on me, but the worry still sat prominent in the back of my mind that he would find some other student he thought was cuter than me, smarter than me, wittier than me, and he'd start sleeping with her and slowly grow tired of me. I knew this was because of what Alex did but it didn't stop the worry. But I promised myself not to be wrapped up in this and torn up by it when it was clearly not the reality.

Uni, on the other hand, was everything I dreamed of and more. The freedom I had was better than the strict setting of the private school I'd be stuck in for so long, it occurred to me that school when you're younger is much more like prison than anything else. But once I went to BPP, I had the freedom to choose my classes, my major, no school wide consequences for being late to class by accident or needing to read things aloud with everyone else. It was independent and self paced, which is where I really excelled best in my studies.

Surprisingly, my first year of uni seemed to slip right past me without even noticing. In the spring time Luke had promised me that he had a big surprise for me in the summer, and I couldn't guess what it could have been, but he was very secretive about it and wouldn't even give me hints. It drove me insane.

Eleanor and I actually met up with each other for spring break instead of spending it with Luke and she gushed to me all about this guy she had met and how respectful he is, and how well he treated her and how they'd only been together for a little over a month but that she was convinced he was really the one for her. I made her show me pictures and I approved, as he was a very incredibly good looking guy. I was so happy for her, a bit envious that she got to see him all the time and I didn't have that luxury with Luke, but more excited for her than anything else. She had really started realizing her love for maths, which I could not at all relate to but was excited that she was figuring out maybe what she wanted to major in.

By the time summer came around, Luke had been so secretive of his surprise that I almost forgot about it entirely. In any case, I was more excited to see him than I was for anything else.

As he got off the train, I ran to him and jumped into his arms, him holding me close and tight. "I missed you so much."

He set me down, kissing me softly and smiling at me. "Yep, beautiful as ever, just as I remember." 

"Stop it," I blushed, smiling at him as he kissed my nose. "Come on, let's go get something to eat. I'm starving."

As we sat down and ate our sandwiches at this little cafe, I caught up with Luke about everything he had been dealing with the past few weeks, finishing up last minute grades and everything. I had finally finished all my finals and had officially passed my first year at uni, and was glad to have it done, behind me and have a whole summer to have Luke for.

"Hey, I have that surprise for you," he said as we walked to his apartment, which wasn't far from where we had gotten lunch. I stopped and looked at him digging in his small carry-on bag he'd had from the train, pulling out a very small box and handing it to me.

"You said it was a BIG surprise," I teased, and he rolled his eyes playfully.

"It is big, you'll see that once you open it up you lunatic."

"Okay, okay, it better not be your dick somehow magically squished in here."

He blushed. "Very funny."

I smiled at him smugly and finally turned to the little box and untied the string around it. I lifted the top to see it was a key.

"Is this—"

"It's a key to my apartment," he said. "Well, our apartment. I want you to live with me."

"Well yes," I smiled at him. "I figured I'd be over pretty much all the time this summer anyways." I had to admit, this wasn't what I was expecting. And I didn't really want to be stuck there all winter by myself without him.

"There's more," he said. "I'm going to be home all winter this time. I didn't want to spoil it for you, but I've actually been trying to train to get a spot as a professor at BPP and they finally hired me for this next fall quarter."

"Shut up." I stood with my mouth gaping open.

He smiled. "I'm not working at that private school anymore, packed up my entire classroom just last week actually."

"Oh my god Luke! This is amazing!" I yelled, throwing my arms around him. "I get to see you all year?"

"Yes," he laughed, and I squeezed him, suddenly excited to go home to our new shared apartment.

"Well let's go! I'm going to have a lot of packing to do soon!" I pulled his hand down with me towards his apartment, unable to wipe the smile from my face and felt a huge wave of relief wash over my whole body.

We spent that night together, and I bugged him about all the redecorating we would need to do because I simply couldn't live in an apartment so bland. He laughed the whole time, playing along and agreeing that he wasn't the best at decorating. Our idea of celebration was the same as it always is, having lots of sex especially seeing as we hadn't in so long it was needed.

I laid with him in our bed afterwards, cuddled up into his side, feeling relieved and content and finally like I had nothing lurking around the corner. Except maybe telling my parents, but that was the least of my worries at the moment.

"I can't tell you how happy I am about this, and you," I sighed.

"But I get it, because I feel the same," he said, tracing small circles on the bare skin of my arm.

I rolled over and smirked at him. "I never thought I'd be saying this when I first met you, but I'm glad you replaced my old English professor."

He laughed, pulling me closer to him and giving me a kiss on the lips. "I'm sure that was painful for you to admit."

"Incredibly painful, might need some morphine," I replied, though the air around us was lighthearted and I couldn't hide my smile.

"I love you so so much," he said, smiling still and kissing me again.

"I love you so so much," I said back, leaning into his embrace and feeling all of the pieces finally fall into place.


End file.
